NewDay79

Hello all,

So I am new and just beginning to get my plan together for my sobriety and have a question for you all.

Are there certain activities (besides the obvious bars and such) that you had to stay away from to prevent yourself from being triggered?

There are several TV shows I watch and enjoy (yes, introvert to the max) but I realize that many of them have characters who consume a considerable amount of alcohol (Shameless, Archer, Weeds, Desperate Housewives, etc.). They pretty much normalize drinking and I am thinking that I should stay away from them for a while at least.

Have any of you done the same?

Sorry if this is already posted somewhere. I am new to the site and haven't quite searched all the threads.

kittycat3

Yes, you should initially avoid triggers. It works the same for quitting smoking. I had to avoid Mad Men for a time.
But what triggers you is a personal decision. I don't think that for me a TV show would be a trigger, but I did not drink while watching TV nor is watching others drink (in person or on TV) a trigger for me. If it is difficult for you then by all means, avoid the shows & use this time to explore some different hobbies!

NewDay79

When I watch certain shows, my AV (that means alcoholic voice, right?) tells me: "See how she is doing it. She had one bottle of wine that she shared with another person and is able to still have a productive day. You can too, love! Just try again".

Of course, now I know that is no longer the case.....................

grandma12

Welcome New day, Yes i have 79 days in last weekend i was in a hotel hot tub wit my family, a couple came in wit a bottle of wine i had to leave as hot tubing wit wine is my fav, but staying sobor is a great trade off.

janiebluebird

I find TV shows and movies with drinking and smoking to be huge triggers for me. They make it seem fun and normal. The plane ride scene from Bridesmaids cracks me up, I have to remind myself that being a loser alcoholic who is hung over and embarrassed the next day is not funny and don't get any ideas. Even How I Met Your Mother - another favorite of mine - features a bar in every episode where the gang seems to nonchalantly drink beers together every day like its just the normal meet up and there are no negative consequences. I remind myself that many, many actors and actresses do not even consume alcohol in real life because they take their careers and physiques very seriously. Its a big conspiracy!! Ha.

Gottalife

Avoiding triggers can be a useful short term strategy to allow you to get your feet on the ground, but if you are as alcoholic as I was, triggers weren't the cause so hiding from them provided only temporary relief.

Triggers were not part of the lingo when I was drinking. What I tried was a geographical - which was to get me away from all the people, places and things that made me drink. Only problem was I took me with me, and all the old problems arrived soon after. It wasn't people, places or things that made me drink. It was the disease of alcoholism, and I became a hopeless case. When I drank I couldn't stop, and when I tried to stop I was tripped up by the strange mental blank spot where I couldn't bring into my mind the reasons why I should stop, always preferring some trivial excuse, or manytimes drinking without any conscious thought at all.

Something more was required for me to recover.

FeelingGreat

TV didn't bother me but I stayed away from social gatherings that centred around alcohol. Avoided liquor outlets.

firstweek

Have stayed away from the social gatherings so far which has helped but I know that I am going to have to face them at some point. The first one is a friends 30th party next week but I am going as the designated driver so should be ok. My big trigger in the past is that I live in a country where the language is not my native one therefore when people start getting drunk and speaking really fast I get a bit bored and sort of retreat into my own world and drink. So it will be interesting to see what the next social function brings. By driving I know I CANNOT drink so I think that's a step in the right direction as I am responsible for getting myself and other people home safely. Strangely enough booze in the house doesn't bother me so much. I mean our wine racks are full and there's beer in the fridge and I haven't felt the needs to take one. I suppose I have tried to quit in the past by banning all alcohol from my immediate vicinity and that didn't work either so I guess I'm trying to keep the environment as "normal" as possible and beat my demons in spite of the temptations. I think its different strokes for different folks! Strangely the one thing I have been thinking about is when my sister visits in July (she sure likes a bottle of wine)....I'm already wondering how I will feel when we are sitting in the sun on my stoop and she's knocking back a glass and I'm there with my 7up...but oddly I'm sorta looking forward to it. Anyhow's rambling out loud here but it really is a very important thing you raise "the trigger" got me thinking so thank you! You are totally normally - I have all the feelings you describe! On day 12 now and while I still worry about future urges (pointless we can only take each day as it comes right!?) I feel much better health wise, more aware, skin is better, sleeping better, moods settling down. Stick with it, stay sober and best of luck!!!!

JCMalta

Lots of triggers to ruin my 10th sobriety day, mostly supermarkets from where I used to buy the crap.

Nevertheless

My big thing was stress. If you know you are headed for something that will stress you out try to avoid it is possible.
Also,try not to go anywhere without an escape plan. Carol used to always say a craving only lasts a few minutes,and for the most part I agree. If you can simply get away from whatever it is that is making you want to drink,even for a few minutes. It will help a lot.
The best thing is experience. You know more what will trigger yourself. Think ahead and try to avoid those situations.
I wish you the best.
Fred

bigsombrero

I didn't stop watching many shows - but I DEFINITELY had to stop watching "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" and if you've ever watched the show you'll know why. Other things I avoid are going into bars or pubs (even to meet friends who know i'm not drinking), and I also do my best to stay away from liquor stores and liquor aisles at my local grocery store. Probably different for everyone. Good luck!

mfsteve1

The pool table. I have one in the Man Cave that's become decoration.

NewDay79

Thx all. I really appreciate the input.

pluginjug

When I got sober, I didn't want to have sobriety where I had to avoid situations, places and persons in order to stay sober.

I wouldn't avoid TV shows because of drinking in them. I'm not violent, but I watch movies with violence in them.

I go to events with drinking if there's a reason for going other than getting drunk. I also go to pubs with non-alcoholic drinkers.

About the only thing I avoid is going out on the town with people specifically setting out to get hammered (or at house party where everyone is getting hammered). These days all of my friends are sober or not alcoholic so it's really not an issue.

wheresthefun

I stayed away from nothing, and still do, BUT that's ME. When my wife is finally "ready" to stop, she has a list of things she'd like us to steer clear of, at least for a while, and I will honor any request that will help her to get and maintain sobriety.

Carlotta

The only thing I try to stay away from is the corner convenience store. I will only go there with a specific list (even if it s one item) and will not even go down the aisle since I found myself in front of the beer/wine case one time when I went to buy cigarettes.
Otherwise, I just go on with my life as normal and some of my friends are normal drinkers, no trigger if someone has a glass of wine or a beer in front of me but I have a friend who is an alcoholic and I have to remove myself when he gets a buzz because his stupidity gets on my nerves and he is the type of drunk who will not shut the H ..up. I am lucky I drank home alone so I really don t go to bars and restaurants are not a problem either.

Critica76

I used to listen to certain music and drink...I don't listen to that music anymore.

Threshold

in the early days, certain music that I associated with drinking and getting wasted. Californication...sigh. I love that show.

Liquor aisle at the store, liquor shops (even today, with friends, I get twitchy and wanting to have just a little...ugh)

Parties where drinking was a huge part of it...but dinner parties and most birthday parties are still cool.

certain recovery meetings made me want to use SO badly, I had to pick and choose very carefully.

War stories about how much people drank and used, etc...made me feel inferior, a poser, like I had to go prove myself...how stupid is THAT.

YouRmySunshine

You will be surprised at how many things you look back & say "wow not sure the last time I did/watched/listened to that SOBER!
It was hard to learn how to just have fun or even just "be" with out that alcohol crutch.

It slowly gets easier. But I am still actively in treatment & learning ways to avoid relapse, and deal with triggers, which for me are many!

Eddie2010

My advice is to just stay away from that first drink no matter where you are or who you're with. Alcohol seems to be everywhere, so it's kind of hard to avoid it entirely. Just never let yourself be fooled into thinking you can have just one. It never works.