Tetra

I find that nights are hard. I feel very lonely, like everyone in the world is asleep except me.

It's 1am here. I have to give a big presentation at college tomorrow, and I am so nervous I could wet myself. I hate to admit this, but there were times as an undergrad when I drank a glass or three of wine, and then did a presentation.

My parents have some wine downstairs that they got as Christmas gifts. I feel like opening a bottle right now and drinking it, but that would be the stupidest thing in the world. I don't know why I feel like this, I am over a year sober and I know how ill alcohol makes me.

I am a shy and reserved person by nature. The thought of tomorrow makes me want to throw up, especially as our presentations will be videotaped, and feedback given after.

I am sitting here with a glass of milk and a plate of cookies. If any of you reading this are religious, could you say a little prayer for me, and if you don't pray, then cross your fingers

I love this site, and I am very grateful for all the support here, I find that it helps a lot. I will get through the presentation tomorrow, without any wine, and report back tomorrow night.

Thanks to all of you.

Sapling

I'll say a big prayer for you...You're going to be fine.

mytime66

I'll say a prayer for you. And just relax about your presentation. Your going to do fine cause you've already shown how strong you are by getting that year of sobriety behind you. Stay strong and trust yourself and get some sleep.

OneLessLonely

I'm not asleep. The great thing about SR is there are always people around. And we all understand. Sending hugs to you. Grats on over a year by the way. That is a show of your strength. Not a lot of people are good at presentations or public speaking. Just speak what you know and what you've learned and you'll be okay. Act like your audience is SR!

LDT

Prayers said for you. You will be fine, Tetra. Here's what works for me when I perform ( I'm a musician). I walk out on stage....take a bow.....and then take a few extra seconds to look the audience straight in the eye(s).... I scan the auditorium.... and then I smile......and then I play.

Congrats on your sober time!

zjw

yep a year of sobriety and your worried about a presentation should be a piece of cake you'll do fine!

ForMyGirls

Prayers sent. I'm with you on the public speaking thing.... I hate it, but unfortunately, my job requires a lot of it....

I have noticed though that the anxiety meter is way lower now before I speak compared to where it used to be when I was drinking, and I only have a few weeks under my belt. With over a year under yours, you should be golden!!!

pooky

Praying for you Tetra
Pook

neferkamichael

Tetra, praying and keeping my fingers crossed. Rootin for ya. Good luck.

LatteLady

By now, you have already made the presentation. How did it go?
The fear of public speaking is ranked almost equal with the fear of fire amongst people.
I am a retired motivational speaker. Yeah, sometimes my knees were knocking, but after a few moments I was in gear and going great.
Speak, at first, just to one friendly face in the audience. Then you will relax and all is well.
A podium, or a notebook in your hands is a good crutch.

akberry

How did your presentation go? I hope well, sweaty palms and all. I don't like public speaking either. I usually take my glasses off so that I can see their faces. Everyone is a fuzzy face. Seems to be less intimidating.

TTBABP

I did not read your post to pray pre-presentation but I just said a post presentation prayer - so how did it go?

TrixMixer

EARTH to TETRA!!!!!Come In.........

How did the presentation go?? We are here and ready to talk about it.

Tetra

Holy **** on a cracker, that wasn't easy at all. Especially as feedback was given afterwards. However the lecturer did say that despite everything, I did manage to be funny and I set a high standard I am going to focus on the positives There was a time when I would have drunk to get through it, and drunk afterwards as a reward for doing it. I'm so happy that I don't do that any more I'm sitting here with my usual glass of milk and plate of cookies. I'm so glad I found this site Thank you all for your prayers and good wishes.

TrixMixer

[B]CONGRATULATIONS! TETRA[/B]

I think you deserve a Hot Fudge Sundae with LOOOOOOOTS of whipped cream, eh!

mytime66

Congratulation

Sapling

Prayers work...You worked...Nice job all around!

Sie

vegibean

Oh Tetra, how I feel for you. I just got back (and not quite in the clear) of a relapse after getting almost 5 years of sobriety under me. I had my good days, I had my bad days, I felt lonely, I THOUGHT about drinking, but didn't.

Just and FYI... I work full time and am also a full time student... through the last several years I can relate to how you are feeling.

Don't touch the wine, it is NOT WORTH IT, YOU ARE!!!!! I am worth it, even with the relapse that I have had, but you know what?? I also did more "research" and sit here and tell you, that, "yes, it can get worse again", so don't do it. Hang in there, we're all here for you. This site is THE BEST EVER, and even now is my saving grace, and I have felt so good be welcomed back.

Hang in there, the more you get through things SOBER, the easier they get. Let me tell you, coming clean and admitting to several people that "hey, I relapsed" took some nerve on my part, but I don't think I could have done it if I hadn't already walked over/through four years of "doing it sober."

You can do it!! :ghug3