My story and a few questions
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 4
My story and a few questions
I'm a 23 year old man and I have been struggling with alcohol for the better part of 5 years. I started binging at 18 when I was in the Army and it has been all downhill from there. I'm a college student now, and the binging has just continued - I can't have more than 2 drinks without binging for at least 3 or 4 days. In March I made the decision to quit, and I started to alienate myself from my - now ex - girlfriend and most of my friends because they just couldn't accept me wanting to be sober. I've since realized that they weren't really friends of mine, and more of drinking buddies, but the problem is that I'm very lonely. I'm afraid to visit my parents because my father drinks a lot and he always tries to get me to drink - he has a problem too, but he loves alcohol and will never give it up. I made it two months sober but I couldn't take the loneliness and ended up going out for drinks with an old friend, and here I am a month and a half later just getting over an alcohol withdrawal. I'm truly tired of this existence and I want really want to live my life without alcohol.
For those of you who have remained sober, how did you deal with alcohol within your family? I love being around my dad, but I can't continually have alcohol shoved in my face - and to be honest, I really don't want to be around it. He says he doesn't push it on me, but he definitely does.
I want to start going to meetings because I need to be social again but without alcohol. Should I use the counseling center at my school and have a therapist find a good program for me? How did you go about finding a good program?
For those of you who have remained sober, how did you deal with alcohol within your family? I love being around my dad, but I can't continually have alcohol shoved in my face - and to be honest, I really don't want to be around it. He says he doesn't push it on me, but he definitely does.
I want to start going to meetings because I need to be social again but without alcohol. Should I use the counseling center at my school and have a therapist find a good program for me? How did you go about finding a good program?
Let go and Let God!
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 352
Welcome!!
I come from a family of drinkers. My dad died of alcoholism. When I first got sober I didn't go around my dad, unless I knew he wasn't drinking. If he was going to be drinking it was and in and out thing. It has gotten so much easier with time. Now I go to the family get togethers (extended family) and as soon as everyone starts getting drunk that is when I know it is time to leave. I am lucky enough that my mom is the Alanon Queen, so there is no alcohol at her house.
You can try the counseling center at your school or you go to an AA meeting. You have to find what works for you.
I come from a family of drinkers. My dad died of alcoholism. When I first got sober I didn't go around my dad, unless I knew he wasn't drinking. If he was going to be drinking it was and in and out thing. It has gotten so much easier with time. Now I go to the family get togethers (extended family) and as soon as everyone starts getting drunk that is when I know it is time to leave. I am lucky enough that my mom is the Alanon Queen, so there is no alcohol at her house.
You can try the counseling center at your school or you go to an AA meeting. You have to find what works for you.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome...
Thanks for your military service...good to know you are back home.
I'm so glad you are now in school
I went directly into AA for my alcholism...and as you mentioned I too
wanted to find new friends to socialize with. Worked out great for me.
We do all sorts of interesting and fun things outside of meetings..
and together we move ahead in our lives....
Sure.there are other ways...and asking about them with the center
might be the way to go.
We also have members here who are willing to share with you on
what they are doing to improve their goal of lasting sobreity.
My late parents were not drinkers..others will be able to share on that.
Thanks for your military service...good to know you are back home.
I'm so glad you are now in school
I went directly into AA for my alcholism...and as you mentioned I too
wanted to find new friends to socialize with. Worked out great for me.
We do all sorts of interesting and fun things outside of meetings..
and together we move ahead in our lives....
Sure.there are other ways...and asking about them with the center
might be the way to go.
We also have members here who are willing to share with you on
what they are doing to improve their goal of lasting sobreity.
My late parents were not drinkers..others will be able to share on that.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: KC MO
Posts: 980
Welcome to SR.
I would try AA first. There is no way someone can did that out of your closet down the road,like they "might" be able to if you got school involved. Not saying I wouldn't go that route. But I would try other things first. And you sound like you need sober (or trying to get sober)friends. And if you find the right AA. That will fill the bill.
When quit drinking,I did whatever it took to keep from taking that first drink. And I am talking about situations like your father. If he is a trigger,then it's best to stay away from for a while. Nobody in my family drinks,but then again I don't really have any family. But what I am trying to say is sobriety HAS to come first.
It is OK to be selfish when it comes to that. When I quit I always thought ahead,and had an escape plan when I thought I would get into sticky situations.
There is nothing wrong with just leaving.
I wish you the best.... Fred
I would try AA first. There is no way someone can did that out of your closet down the road,like they "might" be able to if you got school involved. Not saying I wouldn't go that route. But I would try other things first. And you sound like you need sober (or trying to get sober)friends. And if you find the right AA. That will fill the bill.
When quit drinking,I did whatever it took to keep from taking that first drink. And I am talking about situations like your father. If he is a trigger,then it's best to stay away from for a while. Nobody in my family drinks,but then again I don't really have any family. But what I am trying to say is sobriety HAS to come first.
It is OK to be selfish when it comes to that. When I quit I always thought ahead,and had an escape plan when I thought I would get into sticky situations.
There is nothing wrong with just leaving.
I wish you the best.... Fred
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 4
Thank you all for the quick responses. This is a great forum; it's good to know that I'm not alone and that others have made it through this to live good lives. I'm out of town right now, but as soon as I get back to my apartment tomorrow morning I'm going to look up AA in my area. After reading the posts on here, most people who go seem to enjoy it. I'm struggling through a lot of negative emotions right now after this withdrawal - I'm ashamed that I made it two months without a drink just to end up back in the pits. A good community of support is really what made me fail and I definitely need to take steps to change it. I know what I need to do, it's just a matter of sucking it up and going to a meeting. I'm definitely gonna stick around here too.
If anyone else can share stories of their sobriety in relation to family members and friends drinking, please share.
If anyone else can share stories of their sobriety in relation to family members and friends drinking, please share.
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