Inner Turmoil and Drinking
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
Inner Turmoil and Drinking
First off...I'm 23 days sober...again. Anyways...
I've been dealing with some inner conflict, discouragement, disappointment, and overall feeling of absolutley no hope to improve my life.
I have been dealing with this bundle of crap for years. I know it is the number one reason why I drank or consider going back to drinking.
I just can't seem to find a way out of this mess.
The main issue which is causing me the most stress/discomfort is:
Career/Job/Periods of Unemployment/Interviewing and applying to jobs with no success. I am so discouraged with all of this mess right now. Have been for years. Ever since I graduated from college six years ago my whole career/job aspect of my life has been a joke/mess.
Anyway, this mental mess just won't go away. AA is not going to help this, counseling is not, meds are not, ect.
I don't know what my point is really, but I am an emotional wreck and really, really want to drink. (Please understand that I know drinking will not help, but neither will anything else. I have tried everything under the sun.
Bottom line is that for those that have a lot off Inner Turmoil inside of them that I can relate and hope peace may come our way one day.
Peace from within everybody!
I've been dealing with some inner conflict, discouragement, disappointment, and overall feeling of absolutley no hope to improve my life.
I have been dealing with this bundle of crap for years. I know it is the number one reason why I drank or consider going back to drinking.
I just can't seem to find a way out of this mess.
The main issue which is causing me the most stress/discomfort is:
Career/Job/Periods of Unemployment/Interviewing and applying to jobs with no success. I am so discouraged with all of this mess right now. Have been for years. Ever since I graduated from college six years ago my whole career/job aspect of my life has been a joke/mess.
Anyway, this mental mess just won't go away. AA is not going to help this, counseling is not, meds are not, ect.
I don't know what my point is really, but I am an emotional wreck and really, really want to drink. (Please understand that I know drinking will not help, but neither will anything else. I have tried everything under the sun.
Bottom line is that for those that have a lot off Inner Turmoil inside of them that I can relate and hope peace may come our way one day.
Peace from within everybody!
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,910
Everyone faces discouragement and disappointment in life. A whole lot of people are also out of a job and they are hard to come by in these economic times. This is all called life and we all need to be able to face life on life's terms. You said you know drinking won't help, but it can also make things a lot worse. A LOT worse.
Have you considered signing up with a temp agency for work until you can find something permanent? Maybe even a part-time job or two part-time jobs can tide you over until you find something better. There are always things we can do to inch ourselves along until things get better. You aren't the only one out there with these problems, but as you said, drinking won't help.
Have you considered signing up with a temp agency for work until you can find something permanent? Maybe even a part-time job or two part-time jobs can tide you over until you find something better. There are always things we can do to inch ourselves along until things get better. You aren't the only one out there with these problems, but as you said, drinking won't help.
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
I know, I know. Drinking won't help.
It has been hell since leaving college. Not even going to lie. It doesn't matter what I went to school for or what I majored in. College was and is a complete waste of time. Just about everyone has a college education these days...Finding a job with a degree and with some job experience isn't enough these days. Basically there is no way to even get a job or one that will pay the bills.
The only good thing that I have figured out these last six years is that I know for sure what I don't want to do.
Been drinking since 12/13. Actually probably had my first drink/beer when I was 11. Almost 30 now. Since then alcohol has always been on my mind. I'm not gonna drink for a while, but lately that temptation has been creeping into my mind.
It has been hell since leaving college. Not even going to lie. It doesn't matter what I went to school for or what I majored in. College was and is a complete waste of time. Just about everyone has a college education these days...Finding a job with a degree and with some job experience isn't enough these days. Basically there is no way to even get a job or one that will pay the bills.
The only good thing that I have figured out these last six years is that I know for sure what I don't want to do.
Been drinking since 12/13. Actually probably had my first drink/beer when I was 11. Almost 30 now. Since then alcohol has always been on my mind. I'm not gonna drink for a while, but lately that temptation has been creeping into my mind.
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
Originally Posted by suki44883 
Everyone faces discouragement and disappointment in life. A whole lot of people are also out of a job and they are hard to come by in these economic times. This is all called life and we all need to be able to face life on life's terms. You said you know drinking won't help, but it can also make things a lot worse. A LOT worse.
Have you considered signing up with a temp agency for work until you can find something permanent? Maybe even a part-time job or two part-time jobs can tide you over until you find something better. There are always things we can do to inch ourselves along until things get better. You aren't the only one out there with these problems, but as you said, drinking won't help.
Have you considered signing up with a temp agency for work until you can find something permanent? Maybe even a part-time job or two part-time jobs can tide you over until you find something better. There are always things we can do to inch ourselves along until things get better. You aren't the only one out there with these problems, but as you said, drinking won't help.
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Ontario Canada
Posts: 91
I know its not much encouragement but Dave Ramsey said it today, the best way to make 80K is to make 30K, if there are no jobs in the area you went to school in, you may have to work at something that makes way less in order to prove yourself. I know its not great, but it may a good start in the right direction.
Good luck to you and stay strong!
Good luck to you and stay strong!
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,910
Dave is absolutely right. No one starts out at the top; we all start small and work our way up. Figure out how much you need a month to get by and then look for jobs that will give you that much. It's always easier to get a job anyway if you already have one. You'll be gaining work experience at the very least.
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 147
Originally Posted by Supercrew
What type of work are you looking for?
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Join Date: Oct 2010
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Posts: 147
Originally Posted by suki44883
Dave is absolutely right. No one starts out at the top; we all start small and work our way up. Figure out how much you need a month to get by and then look for jobs that will give you that much. It's always easier to get a job anyway if you already have one. You'll be gaining work experience at the very least.
The thing is I do have some pretty good work experience. I don't feel like I am entitled to anything. I am not some typical young buck looking to make big money. Seriously. Decent job, decent pay, decent experience, room to progress are the main factors for me.
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I actually have an interview coming up on Thursday. I will drive 3.5 hours to get there and 3.5 hours to get back home. Just to note that I have been to several different states and cities for interviews. Just saying it's not like I'm not trying.
Usually after I get back home from these "interview trips" I always seem to feel discouraged and like I have wasted time, money, gas, ect and it always makes me want to get obliterated. Even if I feel good about how the interview went I always end up feeling bad b/c these people interviewing can act one way and mean another. It's such a ******** game. I hate job interviews. It's all pretentious BS.
Usually after I get back home from these "interview trips" I always seem to feel discouraged and like I have wasted time, money, gas, ect and it always makes me want to get obliterated. Even if I feel good about how the interview went I always end up feeling bad b/c these people interviewing can act one way and mean another. It's such a ******** game. I hate job interviews. It's all pretentious BS.
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
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Originally Posted by Rift
Honestly, temp agencies are a joke. I have tried that route, but they usually only look to place people in administrative jobs, clerical, filing type crap, but if you don't have work experience doing these very simple things then they will not consider you. Temp agencies also try to find people for forklift/warehouse type work but again they will not consider me at all.
I've worked some real crap jobs just to pay bills and put food on the table.
Sounds to me like you have a reason for everything not working out in your life.
I have found that a job, no matter what it is, has helped me feel productive and a contributing member of society.
I worked in a welding shop for a year, the only woman, and I ran a drill press, beat the slag off of freshly cut parts, and ran grinders on the finished earth movers. It was hot dirty work, but it brought money in, and I did my best at that job.
I raised two daughters by myself on plenty of minimum wage jobs, including working as a dishwasher for three years in a restaurant.
I'll tell you one thing. Self pity got me nothing but drunk in the end.
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Originally Posted by Freedom1990
Actually I'm currently working through a temp agency at a large medical center. The temp agency pays better than any other job I've had.
I've worked some real crap jobs just to pay bills and put food on the table.
Sounds to me like you have a reason for everything not working out in your life.
I have found that a job, no matter what it is, has helped me feel productive and a contributing member of society.
I worked in a welding shop for a year, the only woman, and I ran a drill press, beat the slag off of freshly cut parts, and ran grinders on the finished earth movers. It was hot dirty work, but it brought money in, and I did my best at that job.
I raised two daughters by myself on plenty of minimum wage jobs, including working as a dishwasher for three years in a restaurant.
I'll tell you one thing. Self pity got me nothing but drunk in the end.
I've worked some real crap jobs just to pay bills and put food on the table.
Sounds to me like you have a reason for everything not working out in your life.
I have found that a job, no matter what it is, has helped me feel productive and a contributing member of society.
I worked in a welding shop for a year, the only woman, and I ran a drill press, beat the slag off of freshly cut parts, and ran grinders on the finished earth movers. It was hot dirty work, but it brought money in, and I did my best at that job.
I raised two daughters by myself on plenty of minimum wage jobs, including working as a dishwasher for three years in a restaurant.
I'll tell you one thing. Self pity got me nothing but drunk in the end.
Whatever though...I don't need anymore crap. Sorry I posted.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
You could join the military ...with your education they might offer you the chance to become an Officer
Check out the pay scale...look at the benefit packages.
You might want to stay after the initial enlistment but if not the Current G>I> Bill for more education is really good...
Check out the pay scale...look at the benefit packages.
You might want to stay after the initial enlistment but if not the Current G>I> Bill for more education is really good...
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I agree with Freedom.
I have had a lot of jobs in my life. I was a military wife for 22 years and that meant moving every couple of years and finding whatever job I could, at the time. Right now I am working in retail and it's really a stretch for me to be in this field. I'm not an outgoing person. Some days are really tough, but I know that this is an opportunity for me to grow as a person. I work with a lot of young people and they are either back in school full-time, hoping to change careers, or they are working two part-time jobs to make ends meet.
And, I learned something from every job I ever had too. Keep yourself open. Maybe the time is right to go in a different job direction. Or maybe it's time to go back to school and work on a career that seems to be more employable.
I have had a lot of jobs in my life. I was a military wife for 22 years and that meant moving every couple of years and finding whatever job I could, at the time. Right now I am working in retail and it's really a stretch for me to be in this field. I'm not an outgoing person. Some days are really tough, but I know that this is an opportunity for me to grow as a person. I work with a lot of young people and they are either back in school full-time, hoping to change careers, or they are working two part-time jobs to make ends meet.
And, I learned something from every job I ever had too. Keep yourself open. Maybe the time is right to go in a different job direction. Or maybe it's time to go back to school and work on a career that seems to be more employable.
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Join Date: Oct 2010
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Basically, older people or older adults don't understand how it is out there. That has been my experience. My parents, friends, strangers, all think...sure you can get a job. It's not hard.
Older generations still have that mentality...like you can make it happen, you have to help you, you can get a job if you want to. So sick of hearing this crap. How about try going on some interviews and see how it is out in this world.
Older generations still have that mentality...like you can make it happen, you have to help you, you can get a job if you want to. So sick of hearing this crap. How about try going on some interviews and see how it is out in this world.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 95
There is a lot of people in the whole world going through unemployment right now, especially young people, due to the global turmoil the economy is facing. There is a lot of people in my college, from 25 to 30 years old, that are actually going to college for the second time simply because they have spent a lot of time looking for work and have not found anything good.
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
Originally Posted by Rift
Basically, older people or older adults don't understand how it is out there. That has been my experience. My parents, friends, strangers, all think...sure you can get a job. It's not hard.
Older generations still have that mentality...like you can make it happen, you have to help you, you can get a job if you want to. So sick of hearing this crap. How about try going on some interviews and see how it is out in this world.
Older generations still have that mentality...like you can make it happen, you have to help you, you can get a job if you want to. So sick of hearing this crap. How about try going on some interviews and see how it is out in this world.
I know how hard it is to get a job. It took over 2 years to find the one with the temp agency.
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Join Date: Apr 2010
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I am grateful for this thread because it reminds me how much it sucks when i get inside my head - Because I can relate to the angst and focusing on the angst instead of, well, anything else.
Rift, you can control this. We can't offer you any exact answers. But I can tell you that the title of the thread is Inner Turmoil and your post did not talk a lot about inner turmoil. Just the outer turmoil of the job situation, a very external circumstance.
I firmly believe that pausing to breathe, or focusing on something positive for even just 2 minutes will help you relax long enough to find a temporary solve for your situation while you put more effort into finding a long term job while staying sober.
You are going to survive this!
All of this sucks, but these are fixable circumstances. This conclusion of mine has nothing to do with age and everything to do with sobriety.
Wishing you the best!
Rift, you can control this. We can't offer you any exact answers. But I can tell you that the title of the thread is Inner Turmoil and your post did not talk a lot about inner turmoil. Just the outer turmoil of the job situation, a very external circumstance.
I firmly believe that pausing to breathe, or focusing on something positive for even just 2 minutes will help you relax long enough to find a temporary solve for your situation while you put more effort into finding a long term job while staying sober.
You are going to survive this!
All of this sucks, but these are fixable circumstances. This conclusion of mine has nothing to do with age and everything to do with sobriety.
Wishing you the best!
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