T1pp

Hi All,

I was here back in October when I was beginning to think about my drinking. I only posted twice that day from work. And I had resolved to quit drinking, at least for a while to see how it went. That lasted for about 30 minutes after I got home and realized how bored I was without alcohol. I ran out and got a bottle of my favorite Bourbon and continued to drink as usual.

This went on for another two and a half months until I began having the symptoms that originally got my thinking about my need to quit drinking. Basically, I hold water to the point that I have difficulty catching my breath. My doctors haven't been able to figure it out, although I think it is pretty obvious. I had my mitral valve replaced and double bypass surgery two and half years ago and have had this problem ever since. However, my cardiologist says my heart is just fine. Anyway, I'm pretty sure that I have mild congestive heart failure, which is the most common cause of this symptom.

About a week before Christmas, I decided to take it upon myself to treat me for mild CHF. This means a healthy diet, appropriate exercise, and cutting way back on alcohol. The literature that I found said that people with mild CHF should limit themselves to no more than two drinks per day with at least two non-alcohol nights per week.

I began by weening myself off alcohol by not drinking a couple nights a week, and when I did want to drink at home, I'd purchase a single pint of good beer. After a week, I replaced the beer with chamomile tea and resolved to not bring alcohol into my home. Besides a couple glasses of wine on Christmas and New Years Eve, I've been alcohol free with very little desire to drink. Last night a friend wanted me to go to happy hour with her, and since I've kind of neglected her the last several weeks--mostly because she gives me a hard time about not drinking, as do several other friends--I decided to go with her. It's not that they're not supportive. They just don't think I have a problem. That's because they only see me in public where I'm the master of moderation, especially when compared to them. They don't see how I am when I'm home alone, which is where I drink to excess.

Anyway, although I had no desire to drink, I had two beers, with no problem holding myself there. But wow! I have a hangover today! No headache or nausea, but just tired and foggy headed. Now I don't know if I ever want to drink at all. I've been feeling so good lately after an alcohol free night, so how I feel today is kind of a wake up call.

I guess the hardest part is the social aspect. My social life pretty much revolves around bars and friends who drink heavily. I've gone out a few times with them and only drank diet coke. I was perfectly fine with that and had just as much fun as I normal do--probably because I wasn't stressed out about drinking and driving. I just wish bars had calorie free, caffeine free alternatives.

Well, I know I'm rambling. I guess I just wanted to write about it, since I really don't have anyone who wants to talk about it. I think it makes them uncomfortable. Anyway, if you got through this book of a post, I thank you for taking the time to read it.

Michael

least

I hope you can give it up for good, especially with your health issues. Living sober really rocks, at least it does for me.

Dee74

Welcome back Michael

I was bored without alcohol too - I discovered eventually that was a 'me' problem...I wasn't really doing much to make my life not boring, y'know?

I've changed myself, and my life, and some of the people and places I used to hang out at. I love my life now.

For me any amount of alcohol led me back to the same dark place, so I'm a complete abstainer. If drinking makes you ill, why not stop?

D

CarolD

welcome back....

I sure needed to make changes in my social circle to protect
my sobriety. Bored? that was me hanging in bars sober...

Hope you will soon find your way into a healthier future
This may entail finding new sober friends and different activities.