I Can't Keep Living Like this
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Chicago Area
Posts: 47
Originally Posted by Sudz No More 
Great news Ana, I was worried you had started a new bottle. I'm glad you made the trip to the ER and hopefully this is the beginning of a great new journey for you into sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 226
Dear Ana,
Just keep it in the day. I'm so sorry to hear you are suffering (throwing up blood). Did the doctors tell you to expect this? Do you need to go back to the ER? Seriously, take care of yourself and be willing to go to any lengths. I do hope this is the last time you have to go through this.
Just keep it in the day. I'm so sorry to hear you are suffering (throwing up blood). Did the doctors tell you to expect this? Do you need to go back to the ER? Seriously, take care of yourself and be willing to go to any lengths. I do hope this is the last time you have to go through this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Chicago Area
Posts: 47
I have been to detox almost 15 times. My liver enzymes have been extremely high in the past. I just relapsed after being sober for nearly 9months. I hope my physical health improved during that sobriety time.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 22
Anaconda,
If you are throwing up blood, that is an extremely severe condition which can be fatal.
My father is an anesthesiologist, and he often describes cases, esepcially during the drinking holidays, in which young and otherwise healthy people end up dying because of gastic/esophagal bleeding.
If you pass out, the bleeding will not stop and you will die.
Whatever you need to do in your life, now, Anaconda, make the change and do not drink. If it means living somewhere different temporarily, do it. Your life depends on it.
If you are throwing up blood, that is an extremely severe condition which can be fatal.
My father is an anesthesiologist, and he often describes cases, esepcially during the drinking holidays, in which young and otherwise healthy people end up dying because of gastic/esophagal bleeding.
If you pass out, the bleeding will not stop and you will die.
Whatever you need to do in your life, now, Anaconda, make the change and do not drink. If it means living somewhere different temporarily, do it. Your life depends on it.
Its time for bed
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Undisclosed Location
Posts: 343
Do you have a plan now?
After de tox I went to meetings every night for a long time. Added exercise and still run for my stress and peace of mind. Eat good and healthy... Everything is done at 1 day at a time.
You had some sober time so I hope you already know what to do different this time and I hope your health rebounds quickly. I drank like you did and we know its not an option anymore... more like suicide!
After de tox I went to meetings every night for a long time. Added exercise and still run for my stress and peace of mind. Eat good and healthy... Everything is done at 1 day at a time.
You had some sober time so I hope you already know what to do different this time and I hope your health rebounds quickly. I drank like you did and we know its not an option anymore... more like suicide!
Grateful Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: MI
Posts: 1,080
Ana, I'm glad you went to the ER. I hope this is the last "wake up" call you ever need again. Do whats right. You know what that it Ana. Do it. Your life depends on it. I will say a prayer for you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Poconos PA
Posts: 1,544
Maybe you can find a non-profit organization like the Salvation Army that will give you a free detox. Certainly there has to be some help out there. I am worried you are going too far with the potential damage you could be causing to yourself.
Think about it Buddy, try calling around to medical buildings in your area and ask the nurses who answer if they know where you could go. Someone must have the location of a place you can detox without cost to you.
Think about it Buddy, try calling around to medical buildings in your area and ask the nurses who answer if they know where you could go. Someone must have the location of a place you can detox without cost to you.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Mgm, AL
Posts: 1,000
I used to want to be the center of attention at all costs and it nearly ended my life. Alcohol is a great advocate for sobriety, and when the pain of getting well becomes less than the pain of continuing the insanity, there will be a decision point. Choose wisely.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,955
A serious medical condition was one of the prime motivators that moved me into recovering from bona fide alcoholism. The choice really got simple for me back then: do I want live or perish.
Please do everything you can to recover from this horrible illness of alcoholism. A far better life is awaiting for you. All you have to do is be an active participant in recovery.
Please do everything you can to recover from this horrible illness of alcoholism. A far better life is awaiting for you. All you have to do is be an active participant in recovery.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
Towards the end i realised the problem actually wasn't that i couldn't keep living like that, i could easily have kept on living like that until i died or did something "silly"...
The problem was i didn't know how to change and, as with other things in life, i needed to accept i didn't know and ask for help...
The problem was i didn't know how to change and, as with other things in life, i needed to accept i didn't know and ask for help...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Middle of MO
Posts: 666
Sounds like a serious situation. You may *think* you cannot afford treatment, but can you afford not to? I know I would have loved getting a script for benzos and sent home, but I am certain that would have accomplished nothing. When we get into the shape you describe, we don't have many chances left, quite possibly none. It sounds like you right at the edge of the cliff and need to do whatever it takes.
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
The thing is...you know what must be done.
You know it, deep down, but you aren't willing to do it.
Your alcoholic ego, which allows you to feel greater than or less than your fellows, but never equal to, is destroying you. ...and it's all a lie. You're killing yourself over a lie.
I want you to go get help. Period. No more talking. Action only.
Kjell
You know it, deep down, but you aren't willing to do it.
Your alcoholic ego, which allows you to feel greater than or less than your fellows, but never equal to, is destroying you. ...and it's all a lie. You're killing yourself over a lie.
I want you to go get help. Period. No more talking. Action only.
Kjell
Thriving sober since 12/18/08
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 3,115
I typed up a big long post, but alas, the dreaded "database error" ate it up.
Hi again ana.. I'm putting on my work hat temporarily to provide you a few resources. I work with people that have very severe medical issues. Many of them are uninsured, and these are the resources I provide to them. I'm also including the local Salvation Army information for detox/rehab if you want to go that route.
All hospitals have indigent care programs and can work with you on payment plans, reduced inpatient/care costs, and aftercare costs if you are eligible. Every hospital has to treat you regardless of your ability or inability to pay them.
Here is the Illinois guide for people without insurance coverage. Depending on your situation, there are different resources here for most anything insurance related:
http://www.familiesusa.org/assets/pd...9/illinois.pdf
Here is a tool through the US Dept of Health and Human Services to find free/low cost (indigent) health care services in the US, you just put in your zip code and it pulls up all the health clinics in the area;
Hill-Burton Free and Reduced-Cost Health Care
And lastly, here's your local Salvation Army, they offer free rehab;
Salvation Army Harbor Light Center
1515 West Monroe Street
Chicago, IL, 60607
(312) 421-5753
Hi again ana.. I'm putting on my work hat temporarily to provide you a few resources. I work with people that have very severe medical issues. Many of them are uninsured, and these are the resources I provide to them. I'm also including the local Salvation Army information for detox/rehab if you want to go that route.
All hospitals have indigent care programs and can work with you on payment plans, reduced inpatient/care costs, and aftercare costs if you are eligible. Every hospital has to treat you regardless of your ability or inability to pay them.
Here is the Illinois guide for people without insurance coverage. Depending on your situation, there are different resources here for most anything insurance related:
http://www.familiesusa.org/assets/pd...9/illinois.pdf
Here is a tool through the US Dept of Health and Human Services to find free/low cost (indigent) health care services in the US, you just put in your zip code and it pulls up all the health clinics in the area;
Hill-Burton Free and Reduced-Cost Health Care
And lastly, here's your local Salvation Army, they offer free rehab;
Salvation Army Harbor Light Center
1515 West Monroe Street
Chicago, IL, 60607
(312) 421-5753
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 711
You may not be able to afford having to pay for detox, but you sure as heck can't afford to spend anymore $$ on booze!! Ditto to what everyone else is saying - nobody would respond if nobody cares. You have alot of people that care immensly about you including me. Please run with the info you have, or crawl, just as long as you do it my friend.
I am praying for you right now. Begging that you take action anaconda.
I am praying for you right now. Begging that you take action anaconda.
Sunny Side Up
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Sth Australia
Posts: 3,802
Originally Posted by Kjell
The thing is...you know what must be done.
You know it, deep down, but you aren't willing to do it.
Your alcoholic ego, which allows you to feel greater than or less than your fellows, but never equal to, is destroying you. ...and it's all a lie. You're killing yourself over a lie.
I want you to go get help. Period. No more talking. Action only.
Kjell
You know it, deep down, but you aren't willing to do it.
Your alcoholic ego, which allows you to feel greater than or less than your fellows, but never equal to, is destroying you. ...and it's all a lie. You're killing yourself over a lie.
I want you to go get help. Period. No more talking. Action only.
Kjell
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Originally Posted by justjo
This is very true, I know it, now, my sister is dead. The booze won in the end.
My father died too b/c the booze won early on in his life.
It darn near killed me too (same car accidents b/c of drinking/driving and blacking out as my father). History darn near repeated, but I think I caught it before it was too late.
I hope the OP catches it too, before it's too late.
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