LimaCharlie

Anger is my worst drinking trigger I'm finding. Tonight I am fricking livid with a couple jokers who not only damaged my car while putting on new tires but managed to F up the job so I had a flat 20 miles later. Brand new tire is now damaged as well. Had to change the flat and now have to go back tomorrow to fix this BS situation. I am demanding a new tire and I know they are going to fight me on it.

Just really pissed off about this and the first thing that came to mind was how much I'd love to pound about four shots right now. Very hard to combat that urge but I was able to. Still very angry but passed the danger zone. I need a better way to deal with anger but don't know what.

Boleo

"Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else."
(Big Book page 64)

suki44883

If that happened to me, I'd be pistoff too! You have every right to be angry, but, as you have realized, pounding about 4 shots isn't going to change what happened. Good on you for realizing that!

sunrise1

Didn't it used to be so easy to just drink and numb whatever emotions that threatened us? Good on you for getting past the hurdle.

Wolfchild

Anger, for me, indicates a lack of acceptance & surrender. How i learned how to deal with any of my feelings, that i didn't understand, was by sharing about them with my sponsor and at meetings. When i felt what seemed to be overwhelming or very intense emotions, i called people or talked with them one on one after the meeting. Doing this, which i occasionaly still do, led me to develope the faith needed for me to reach out to the God of my understanding in times of emotional turmoil and confusion. i know that i will experience many emotions today, but the difference is that i know i don't have to feel them alone. God is always available to help me and guide me as i life life without basing my actions on what i am feeling. Writing on the Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions has helped to establish me upon a spiritual foundation and to have the integrity of character to do the right thing, for the right reasons, at the right time, regardless of what i am thinking or feeling.

1SoberSwede

Hey I totally relate to what you are saying.I got really angry when I loaned my car to a family member who had financial problems.The agreement was,to return the car in a week.....that was 8 months ago.She moved out of her house,and won't tell me where she is,and has nothing but excuses when I talk to her on the phone.I still am trying to recover my car.It has been EXTREMELY difficult to keep my anger in check.

However I refuse to drink over it,because it will not make it better.What helps keep me from blowing a gasket is working out,and cycling.Since I don't have a car,I have gotten back into mountain biking.I average 15 miles per day,and when I have a bad day like yesterday I logged over 25.When my natural endorphins kick in the anger goes away,and the side result is that I'm in the best shape of my life.Sure beats drinking....

LimaCharlie

Well I got things fixed now so that is good. Thanks for letting me vent and being able to relate. Live and learn.

sunrise1

Live and learn, and without the drinking. Congrats!

dasha

Yes good you got it sorted and never cracked!! my anger management used to come in
bottled form also now its a whole new approach needed! admittedly this is
gonna take some gettin used to bein sober, and dealing with these strong emotions and
not givin in to old methods of mind numbing booze! a little practice hope to get the hang
of sooner than later... sat night now and normally pretty scunnered by now.. Heres me
cold stone sober.. Morrow morn i,ll be the one with the smile on my face...

hendershot

I find that it is harder to get angry at a stranger who is three-dimensional person, rather than the two-dimensional caricature I make up in my mind about them. In other words, they are a full person, along with defects of character, a mixture of good and bad. It is harder to get this kind of loving detachment about people who we are really close to, like family, but it is always my goal. I think the person who said acceptance hit the nail on the head. It is never about their behavior, it is about our reaction to it.

1SoberSwede

That's a great way of explaining it.Nobody can make you feel anything.It has taken me a long time to change how I respond when the "Hot" button gets pushed.It's a-lot easier controlling myself sober.It's really not a good idea to drunk dial your old boss at 3 a.m. telling them exactly what you think of them!

iloveme

When i felt what seemed to be overwhelming or very intense emotions, i called people or talked

When you currently live with a not so sober guy that is impossible~!!!