4 months...trying times
jimbo
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: london berks England
Posts: 426
4 months...trying times
its four months no drinking for the bald guy
its/was would of been ?? my daughter Natasha's birthday on the 5th of october i have never got through this day sober before but this time i'm gona make it without drinking ,every year i have just got smashed to shut out the pain of her death but not this year i'm staying sober no matter how bad i feel and i'm gona do it in her memory
i get my lab report back on the 7th and i'm hoping i will get a clean bill of health
i have decided i'm not going to drink this chrimbo at all not a sip
everyone is saying stuff like come on its gona be christmas etc i'm always amazed how much me being sober really gets up every one elses nose
the amount of people that say they cant wait till i drink again is really amazing thanks for the support guys lol
its/was would of been ?? my daughter Natasha's birthday on the 5th of october i have never got through this day sober before but this time i'm gona make it without drinking ,every year i have just got smashed to shut out the pain of her death but not this year i'm staying sober no matter how bad i feel and i'm gona do it in her memory
i get my lab report back on the 7th and i'm hoping i will get a clean bill of health
i have decided i'm not going to drink this chrimbo at all not a sip
everyone is saying stuff like come on its gona be christmas etc i'm always amazed how much me being sober really gets up every one elses nose
the amount of people that say they cant wait till i drink again is really amazing thanks for the support guys lol
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,846
Way to go, Jimbo!
I hope you know how much of an inspiration you've been to me these past few months. I'm right behind you at nearly 3 1/2 months.
I've always been a "life of the party" type...only problem is I never knew when the party was supposed to stop
I've finally realized that the mass quantities of beer were only temporarily drowning out ALL of my emotions, good and bad. I'm discovering all those problems I thought were such a big deal, really aren't all that bad.
My condolences on the loss of your daughter, I can't imagine the pain of such a loss. I'm sure she would be mighty proud of her Dad these days.
Best of luck on your medical report...just don't use it as an excuse to start drinking again!
I'm really looking forward to the upcoming holidays...it'll be the first time in 30 years I've seen them sober.
As for those who want you to start drinking again, f*** 'em!
I hope you know how much of an inspiration you've been to me these past few months. I'm right behind you at nearly 3 1/2 months.
I've always been a "life of the party" type...only problem is I never knew when the party was supposed to stop
I've finally realized that the mass quantities of beer were only temporarily drowning out ALL of my emotions, good and bad. I'm discovering all those problems I thought were such a big deal, really aren't all that bad.
My condolences on the loss of your daughter, I can't imagine the pain of such a loss. I'm sure she would be mighty proud of her Dad these days.
Best of luck on your medical report...just don't use it as an excuse to start drinking again!
I'm really looking forward to the upcoming holidays...it'll be the first time in 30 years I've seen them sober.
As for those who want you to start drinking again, f*** 'em!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 2,548
I dont think drinking would make it any easier anyhow Jim..
might round it off for a bit..........but it will be in the post for sure..
The pain of a losing of a child is beyond my comprehension.......my prayers are with you and your family..
rarely do i get bothered by people to drink....most people know me as a non drinker and dont try to understand it or pressurize.
we got invited years ago to a party....and a guy there who was half cut insisted to pester me most of the night to drink....
not have mastered the art of patience at the time.......i had a quiet word with him in the toilet
.......he left.........i had a great time..
all the best bald man.........................
might round it off for a bit..........but it will be in the post for sure..
The pain of a losing of a child is beyond my comprehension.......my prayers are with you and your family..
rarely do i get bothered by people to drink....most people know me as a non drinker and dont try to understand it or pressurize.
we got invited years ago to a party....and a guy there who was half cut insisted to pester me most of the night to drink....
not have mastered the art of patience at the time.......i had a quiet word with him in the toilet
.......he left.........i had a great time..all the best bald man.........................
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Traveling in Europe
Posts: 415
Congratulations my bald friend. I can't begin to relate to your loss. But your sobriety is the best gift you can give your daughter. All the best, congratulations on your time... I recently got 4 months as well...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
Hi Jim... You are a great addition to our SR family, congratulations on your 4 months.
Like trucker, I cannot imagine the loss of a daughter. My prayers for you this Monday. This could be an opportunity to celebrate the short time she was on this planet and sharing her life with you. Rather than drink, you can pray, meditate, rejoice and grieve, finally, and for the first time.
You can do it.
All my best to you Baldjim...
Mark
Like trucker, I cannot imagine the loss of a daughter. My prayers for you this Monday. This could be an opportunity to celebrate the short time she was on this planet and sharing her life with you. Rather than drink, you can pray, meditate, rejoice and grieve, finally, and for the first time.
You can do it.
All my best to you Baldjim...
Mark
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: KC MO
Posts: 980
Hello Jim
I still have times when I want to drink. But every month that goes by they get less and less. I had a spell a few days ago, and now "poof" it's gone.
The other day I stopped into the Quicktrip where I used to always buy beer when I got off work. I had a real bad day, but I went in bought a DR Pepper and a bag of chips and was on my way home before I realized. I did this without even thinking about buying beer. I think thats a first for me.
I realize your daughters loss is making you want to drink. But in reality it won't help you, it won't help her, it won't help anybody. It won't help anymore than me wanting to get drunk after a bad day at work.
That is the alcoholic mind wanting alcohol. It is telling you you have a reason to drink. I think if you are still sober at this time next year you will wonder why you thought drinking might help, or why you need to drink around christmas. Old friends can be huge problem, especially if they are agging you on to drink.
How many shopping days do we have till christmas
Fred
I still have times when I want to drink. But every month that goes by they get less and less. I had a spell a few days ago, and now "poof" it's gone.
The other day I stopped into the Quicktrip where I used to always buy beer when I got off work. I had a real bad day, but I went in bought a DR Pepper and a bag of chips and was on my way home before I realized. I did this without even thinking about buying beer. I think thats a first for me.
I realize your daughters loss is making you want to drink. But in reality it won't help you, it won't help her, it won't help anybody. It won't help anymore than me wanting to get drunk after a bad day at work.
That is the alcoholic mind wanting alcohol. It is telling you you have a reason to drink. I think if you are still sober at this time next year you will wonder why you thought drinking might help, or why you need to drink around christmas. Old friends can be huge problem, especially if they are agging you on to drink.
How many shopping days do we have till christmas
Fred
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,936
Jim,
I am so sorry to hear about your daughter and I'm sure her birthday, like every day, must be an ordeal.
My father was an alcoholic. When I was 15 he got into AA and sobriety and he changed his life. It was rocky at first. His whole social life had revolved around booze. As a teenager I was astonished, and I was afraid to get my hopes up, again, that he would get that sh*t out of his/our lives!!
Although he caused me and my brothers and sister an enormous amount of pain and damage, and he and my codie mom had an insane relationship in those drunk years, the change in him was nothing short of phenomenal!
He made his amends to us, over time, in words and deed. I forgave him. He really became my biggest inspiration. To see the changes in him, to see him struggling to change, to see guys at parties etc. trying to shove a beer in his hand and him saying "Nah, I'm OK." and sticking with his coca-cola on the rocks - it was inspiring.
To this day he is the FACT that lets me know change is possible for any human being willing to do the work. He taught me:
Self-examination & changing oneself is not easy but it is worth it!
And amends and forgiveness can change a life.
My father died ten years ago. His 20 years of recovery was really something special and brought out all the good, fun, loving, serene, and non-judgemental qualities that had always been inside him but were drowning in alcohol.
As a child of an alcoholic I always believed it was my fault on some level that my father drank...I know it's crazy - and it took me many many years of seeing his recovery (and that it belonged 100% to him just like all his choices) and many years of therapy and AlAnon for me to realize it wasn't true. So, Jim, just for today, don't have a drink. I don't know what your beliefs are, hell I don't even know what my beliefs are, but I do know that your daughter IS very proud of you for your months of sobriety. And thank you for sharing this as it reminds me again of the amazing choice my Dad made all those years ago to get sober, and what courage and strength it took.
peace-
b.
I am so sorry to hear about your daughter and I'm sure her birthday, like every day, must be an ordeal.
My father was an alcoholic. When I was 15 he got into AA and sobriety and he changed his life. It was rocky at first. His whole social life had revolved around booze. As a teenager I was astonished, and I was afraid to get my hopes up, again, that he would get that sh*t out of his/our lives!!
Although he caused me and my brothers and sister an enormous amount of pain and damage, and he and my codie mom had an insane relationship in those drunk years, the change in him was nothing short of phenomenal!
He made his amends to us, over time, in words and deed. I forgave him. He really became my biggest inspiration. To see the changes in him, to see him struggling to change, to see guys at parties etc. trying to shove a beer in his hand and him saying "Nah, I'm OK." and sticking with his coca-cola on the rocks - it was inspiring.
To this day he is the FACT that lets me know change is possible for any human being willing to do the work. He taught me:
Self-examination & changing oneself is not easy but it is worth it!
And amends and forgiveness can change a life.
My father died ten years ago. His 20 years of recovery was really something special and brought out all the good, fun, loving, serene, and non-judgemental qualities that had always been inside him but were drowning in alcohol.
As a child of an alcoholic I always believed it was my fault on some level that my father drank...I know it's crazy - and it took me many many years of seeing his recovery (and that it belonged 100% to him just like all his choices) and many years of therapy and AlAnon for me to realize it wasn't true. So, Jim, just for today, don't have a drink. I don't know what your beliefs are, hell I don't even know what my beliefs are, but I do know that your daughter IS very proud of you for your months of sobriety. And thank you for sharing this as it reminds me again of the amazing choice my Dad made all those years ago to get sober, and what courage and strength it took.
peace-
b.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 456
If your lab comes back good.. Be very careful, because that happened to me one time when I quit.. I figured ok, well, I'm not gonna die anytime soon.. Lemme go get hammered..
But good job on the 4 months! I can't wait to get 4 months under my belt.
But good job on the 4 months! I can't wait to get 4 months under my belt.
where the light is
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 2,763
I know it's not the same but in June 2000, I lost my best friend. He was like a brother.
Every summer, we have a fishing tournament in his honour (guess who finally won this year?)
I know my dear friend watches over me. Probably laughs at what a fool I can be!
But I do know that he is so proud that I am winning this battle against alcohol. He gives me strength.
Take it easy, Jim.
And congrats on 4 months sobriety. That's huge!
Every summer, we have a fishing tournament in his honour (guess who finally won this year?
)I know my dear friend watches over me. Probably laughs at what a fool I can be!
But I do know that he is so proud that I am winning this battle against alcohol. He gives me strength.
Take it easy, Jim.
And congrats on 4 months sobriety. That's huge!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 583
Jim
Congrats on 4 months! Thing DO get easier but we do need to feel things. On days like that I would serve at meetings any way possible for a few meetings not just one. Use the community as a crutch... Just an idea.
I'm going to toss out a NonAA book. In my whole life there are a 4 books that really touched and healed me. This latest one is call "The Shack" by William Young. Its a God given book. The authors back story is even more God speaking thru others. It deals with man whos daugthter is taken from him and his quest for answers.
My life has in recovery has been nothing but awesome. I wish you the same.
David
Congrats on 4 months! Thing DO get easier but we do need to feel things. On days like that I would serve at meetings any way possible for a few meetings not just one. Use the community as a crutch... Just an idea.
I'm going to toss out a NonAA book. In my whole life there are a 4 books that really touched and healed me. This latest one is call "The Shack" by William Young. Its a God given book. The authors back story is even more God speaking thru others. It deals with man whos daugthter is taken from him and his quest for answers.
My life has in recovery has been nothing but awesome. I wish you the same.
David
Last edited by CarolD; 10-03-2009 at 11:05 PM. Reason: broken Link Removed
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,786
I understand how difficult this anniversary must be for you. I have no doubt you'll stay sober, tho I understand how hard it will be to face the pain without alcohol to numb your feelings of grief.
Talking to someone about your feelings might be helpful. I wish you well, my friend.:ghug3
Talking to someone about your feelings might be helpful. I wish you well, my friend.:ghug3
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Living in Today!
Posts: 3,945
Originally Posted by baldjim 
its four months no drinking for the bald guy
its/was would of been ?? my daughter Natasha's birthday on the 5th of october i have never got through this day sober before but this time i'm gona make it without drinking ,every year i have just got smashed to shut out the pain of her death but not this year i'm staying sober no matter how bad i feel and i'm gona do it in her memory
i get my lab report back on the 7th and i'm hoping i will get a clean bill of health
i have decided i'm not going to drink this chrimbo at all not a sip
everyone is saying stuff like come on its gona be christmas etc i'm always amazed how much me being sober really gets up every one elses nose
the amount of people that say they cant wait till i drink again is really amazing thanks for the support guys lol
its/was would of been ?? my daughter Natasha's birthday on the 5th of october i have never got through this day sober before but this time i'm gona make it without drinking ,every year i have just got smashed to shut out the pain of her death but not this year i'm staying sober no matter how bad i feel and i'm gona do it in her memory
i get my lab report back on the 7th and i'm hoping i will get a clean bill of health
i have decided i'm not going to drink this chrimbo at all not a sip
everyone is saying stuff like come on its gona be christmas etc i'm always amazed how much me being sober really gets up every one elses nose
the amount of people that say they cant wait till i drink again is really amazing thanks for the support guys lol
jimbo
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: london berks England
Posts: 426
thanks to every one for your kind words
i think i will be ok
by now i would of normally been blotto and then in the mornig on the day of her birthday i would of just got smashed again to blot things out
my friend had his new born baby today at 6am
i dont think i'm up for going around just yet but thats ok i will just try to keep busy and instead of blaming fate,god,the doctors or who ever i will be thankfull for the children i have and be thankfull i'm not a slave to the demon drink anymore and i have a clear mind that can see the beauty in the world and the ugliness too but i am able to be happy for the wonderful things i have and not be consumed by yearning for the things that i do not have
somewhere in there are some jimbo words of wisdom lol
i think i will be ok
by now i would of normally been blotto and then in the mornig on the day of her birthday i would of just got smashed again to blot things out
my friend had his new born baby today at 6am
i dont think i'm up for going around just yet but thats ok i will just try to keep busy and instead of blaming fate,god,the doctors or who ever i will be thankfull for the children i have and be thankfull i'm not a slave to the demon drink anymore and i have a clear mind that can see the beauty in the world and the ugliness too but i am able to be happy for the wonderful things i have and not be consumed by yearning for the things that i do not have
somewhere in there are some jimbo words of wisdom lol
Love my puppies
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: lala land
Posts: 150
Way to go Jim...stay strong my friend. Take things at your own pace, and treat yourself to some TLC. If you're not up to seeing your friends baby, then just let him know and if he is a true friend, he'll understand...don't let yourself be pushed into things you are not ready to handle just yet. This must be a really hard time for you and I'm sending some :praying to you and your family.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
