new, isolation or try to reconnect
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1
new, isolation or try to reconnect
hey everyone,
been reading for quite awhile but only recently signed up. I am 6 days sober after a tough detox but am feeling ok physically now. I used to be very outgoing with a lot of friends but in my early sobriety I just want to be alone. I haven't answered my phone since being sober and I'm not sure why. I feel like I want to wait until I am comfortable with my sobriety until I unveil the new me to the world or something. I know that is unrealisitic because who knows how long it will take me to be completely comfortable with being sober. I guess my question would be, is it bad for my sobriety to be isolated for a long period of time or should I try and reconnect with friends and family sooner than later. thanks for reading
been reading for quite awhile but only recently signed up. I am 6 days sober after a tough detox but am feeling ok physically now. I used to be very outgoing with a lot of friends but in my early sobriety I just want to be alone. I haven't answered my phone since being sober and I'm not sure why. I feel like I want to wait until I am comfortable with my sobriety until I unveil the new me to the world or something. I know that is unrealisitic because who knows how long it will take me to be completely comfortable with being sober. I guess my question would be, is it bad for my sobriety to be isolated for a long period of time or should I try and reconnect with friends and family sooner than later. thanks for reading
We Do Recover
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,619
Isolation wasn't a good place for me to be. Although I did have to stay away from certain people at first--mainly those "old buddies" I used to drink with. That was tough at first...not all of them were alcoholic, but some were--including myself. I had to learn how to form new friendships.....my alcoholism had gotten pretty bad toward the end of my drinking days. Drinking wasn't an option anymore--I had to find "a new way of life"......and actually live out each day to the fullest----not merely exist..as I had been doing while drinking.
Glad you are here!
Keep posting here and reaching out. You don't have to go through this alone. 
Glad you are here!
Keep posting here and reaching out. You don't have to go through this alone. Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Basingstoke UK
Posts: 139
Dont isolate your self or you will start drinking again. I isolated myself for 6 months and BANG relapsed. Six months of isolation is the worse thing. Only my best pals came to see me, and they were sober dont allow anyone in house when Im dry. Not even if someone smells of alcohol. they aitn coming in.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Welcome and Congratulations on chooseing sobriety...
When I was early in sobriety...my family lived 900 miles from me.
They were not a factor in my daily life.
My friends were all excessive drinkers and I needed to find new
ones that shared my new lifestyles and goals.
That's what I did... I found them in the rooms of AA.
I too keep my home a non drinking zone.
This has been working very well for me for a long time.
Glad you decided to post Please do keep in touch.
When I was early in sobriety...my family lived 900 miles from me.
They were not a factor in my daily life.
My friends were all excessive drinkers and I needed to find new
ones that shared my new lifestyles and goals.
That's what I did...
I found them in the rooms of AA.I too keep my home a non drinking zone.
This has been working very well for me for a long time.
Glad you decided to post Please do keep in touch.
problem with authority
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 870
I moved to a new place (a small town) after getting out of rehab. This was for work...didn't know anyone here, much less anyone sober.
I got a meeting list, started going to meetings every day, and eventually got a coffee commitment. It's amazing how profound and effective these simple things can be in early sobriety if you are willing to put yourself forward.
During this time I felt as if all of my skin had been taken off, so I was particularly sensitive and gun-shy, but I do know that isolating and staying home would have impeded my recovery and I might even have started drinking again.
I was told if you do what you always did you'll get what you always got.
M
I got a meeting list, started going to meetings every day, and eventually got a coffee commitment. It's amazing how profound and effective these simple things can be in early sobriety if you are willing to put yourself forward.
During this time I felt as if all of my skin had been taken off, so I was particularly sensitive and gun-shy, but I do know that isolating and staying home would have impeded my recovery and I might even have started drinking again.
I was told if you do what you always did you'll get what you always got.
M
Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 24
"I feel like I want to wait until I am comfortable with my sobriety until I unveil the new me to the world or something. "
Whats Good,
I can relate to what you are saying right here. For me it's that I've told my loved one's before that I am going to quit, or that I quit drinking. When it never really happened or just lasted a couple of day's, I would feel like a failure. I guess I am tired of letting people watch me fail. I am 3 full day's sober today! I am so thankful to be able to share this with all of you. I am really gonna do my absolute best to STAY off alcohol! Good luck to you What's Good! Though I can relate to what you said, I think it would be best for you NOT to isolate yourself!
Whats Good,
I can relate to what you are saying right here. For me it's that I've told my loved one's before that I am going to quit, or that I quit drinking. When it never really happened or just lasted a couple of day's, I would feel like a failure. I guess I am tired of letting people watch me fail. I am 3 full day's sober today! I am so thankful to be able to share this with all of you. I am really gonna do my absolute best to STAY off alcohol! Good luck to you What's Good! Though I can relate to what you said, I think it would be best for you NOT to isolate yourself!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: TX
Posts: 542
Hey whatsgood, welcome to SR. Great site with a lot of great support. Congrats on six days and getting past the hard part. I isolated when I was drinknig so that had to change when I wanted sobriety. I agree with others here isolation and sobriety do not go well together. I've tried it only to realize I need people now more than ever now. Glad you found us, stick around and let us get to know you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: sarasota florida
Posts: 11
I google isolation and sobriety, the new forum I join comes up!
I've been looking into eetings area my area... there are so many options open, day to night!
my issue is I've isolated myself since I quit drugs. As well when I was using...
my day consists of home, a run a mile (park block away), and work(same job for two years)
been that way since.... almost two months of being sober. Now, im trying to get my a$s to get to the meetings since this urge is becoming stronger, but I have so many neg thoughts(anxiety) about the meeting.
Anwyays, I enjoyed gathering yur info abvoce.
....anymore advice would be great!
~stable
I've been looking into eetings area my area... there are so many options open, day to night!
my issue is I've isolated myself since I quit drugs. As well when I was using...
my day consists of home, a run a mile (park block away), and work(same job for two years)
been that way since.... almost two months of being sober. Now, im trying to get my a$s to get to the meetings since this urge is becoming stronger, but I have so many neg thoughts(anxiety) about the meeting.
Anwyays, I enjoyed gathering yur info abvoce.
....anymore advice would be great!
~stable
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Stable....Google anything about alcoholism and SR is likely to come up...lol
Whatsgood...welcome to SR! The first couple of weeks I thinks itsimportant to be gentle with yourself...if that involves some hibernation that's okay as long as you aren't hibernating in a months time. Hang out here instead ...its a good place to get your sealegs so to speak.
Hugs, LaFemme
Whatsgood...welcome to SR! The first couple of weeks I thinks itsimportant to be gentle with yourself...if that involves some hibernation that's okay as long as you aren't hibernating in a months time. Hang out here instead ...its a good place to get your sealegs so to speak.
Hugs, LaFemme
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Great Outdoors
Posts: 1,992
Dee..you are such a stickler for dates!! LaFemme knew it was an old post..she was just seeing if you would notice..:rotfxko
Welcome Stable! I stayed in for the first couple of months..I pretty much mopped myself into a corner. I had surrounded myself with hard core drinkers because..well..I was one. So when I got sober I looked around and everyone was at the bar! Go figure. I live in a population of 3200 people. Many bars and churches here. I am slowly gathering new sober people. But..It is a challenge. SR has been my lifesaver! Good for you on your 2 months sobriety!! Keep it up..it gets better and better for sure..
Welcome Stable! I stayed in for the first couple of months..I pretty much mopped myself into a corner. I had surrounded myself with hard core drinkers because..well..I was one. So when I got sober I looked around and everyone was at the bar! Go figure. I live in a population of 3200 people. Many bars and churches here. I am slowly gathering new sober people. But..It is a challenge. SR has been my lifesaver! Good for you on your 2 months sobriety!! Keep it up..it gets better and better for sure..
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Wappingers Falls, NY
Posts: 618
Welcome...Whatsgood0274
Isolationism does more harm then good. Isolating the problem and resolving to fix what’s broken is the key, but distancing yourself away from the Solution is not.
Yes...this forum has helped many people stay connected through a various network of recovering alcoholics, but it in no way is a substitute for the personal and life altering stories found in the confines of a well intentioned, enlightened and awe inspiring group of people, Known as the fellowship of AA. This forum serves its purpose well and has helped many deal with the frustrations of life outside the parameters of the AA fellowship, and for that were grateful.
However, the best course of action for anyone -In my opinion- who has a tendency towards isolationism, is to limit their time in the confines of any arena that can isolate them away from the unifying force of AA.
~God Bless~
~There's power in numbers~
Isolationism does more harm then good. Isolating the problem and resolving to fix what’s broken is the key, but distancing yourself away from the Solution is not.
Yes...this forum has helped many people stay connected through a various network of recovering alcoholics, but it in no way is a substitute for the personal and life altering stories found in the confines of a well intentioned, enlightened and awe inspiring group of people, Known as the fellowship of AA. This forum serves its purpose well and has helped many deal with the frustrations of life outside the parameters of the AA fellowship, and for that were grateful.
However, the best course of action for anyone -In my opinion- who has a tendency towards isolationism, is to limit their time in the confines of any arena that can isolate them away from the unifying force of AA.
~God Bless~
~There's power in numbers~
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
stableaddict ....
Welcome to our SR Alcoholism Forum
and I see you are also shareing in Substance Abuse.
Some of us do post in multi sections and well done
on your clean time....
I sure hope you will get involved locally with NA
my AA friends are so important to me.
Welcome to our SR Alcoholism Forum
and I see you are also shareing in Substance Abuse.
Some of us do post in multi sections and well done
on your clean time....
I sure hope you will get involved locally with NA
my AA friends are so important to me.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: sarasota florida
Posts: 11
Thank you all for the encouragement! Never thought bein sober would be this difficult, mind loves to wonder, and try to play games with me! Isolation can be scary, but very comforting all at once. Thank you for your feedback. I was curious....
Anwyays, of course I post in many sections tryinf to gather information/ tool on how people moved foward so it will become a little easier for me in time,as well checkout others perspectives of whatever topic of difficulty... I think we all know our problem wasn't in one area, ya know? Why not search around? (Besides im a social butterfly)
Na/ aa I've done research about the meetings, readings on what the atmosphere is like there since people informed me on this site every meetig is different. What I've came to terms with, or convinced myself is since im young- 18- the members(?) There will be so pleased that someone so young is wanting to search ut for help, and that they'll be able to give it. Reminds me of nursing homes to a degree, when I used to volunteer when I was seven the elderly loved that they got to be around someone young.
....but jy whole thing about the meeting is, I feel like im not a bad enough addict to attend yet. But if I don't attend now, if I replase ill become worse and worse.
Anyways, sorry for my rant. Thank you for your kind words.
Anwyays, of course I post in many sections tryinf to gather information/ tool on how people moved foward so it will become a little easier for me in time,as well checkout others perspectives of whatever topic of difficulty... I think we all know our problem wasn't in one area, ya know? Why not search around? (Besides im a social butterfly)
Na/ aa I've done research about the meetings, readings on what the atmosphere is like there since people informed me on this site every meetig is different. What I've came to terms with, or convinced myself is since im young- 18- the members(?) There will be so pleased that someone so young is wanting to search ut for help, and that they'll be able to give it. Reminds me of nursing homes to a degree, when I used to volunteer when I was seven the elderly loved that they got to be around someone young.
....but jy whole thing about the meeting is, I feel like im not a bad enough addict to attend yet. But if I don't attend now, if I replase ill become worse and worse.
Anyways, sorry for my rant. Thank you for your kind words.
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Worcester, MA
Posts: 45
just make dates to hang out with people .....movies....bowling...babysitting for friend's kids, just set up dates left and right so you are with people, but not drinking. i know for me, I have decided not to drink, so I isolate, and it backfires in my face bigtime. I feel lonely, alone. but I know I'm not. neither are you!
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