Brandeeno

Hello everybody,

I am extremely glad to have stumbled upon this site and have navigated and lurked on the site for about a week now.

I am 30 years old, live in Oklahoma and have been an addict/alcoholic since i can remember (maybe 12 years)

I'm single, have a 6 year old daughter(who lives with her mom) and ALWAYS need to be altered. I cannot remember the last time I got through a day without having something to curb my soberness.

I can drink a pint of vodka or whiskey in 2 sips (Could probably down it one if I really wanted to) and do this on a regular basis. When people watch me drink from the bottle they're usually in shock and I often get embarrassed because my problem is so evident. So I often times make up excuses like "I haven't done that in years" when in fact I do it on a regular basis.

Whether it's during lunch, when I'm on a job, right before a job interview, going grocery shopping, or just surfing the internet, I like to have at least a pint in my system.

If it's not hard liquor, it's wine and alot of it.

I can go days at a time and feel I can control it, but all it takes is one moment of boredom and I'm pulling up to the liquor store again. I cant even make it home from the liquor store without cracking the bottle, so I take the back route where the cops seldom go.

5 out of 7 times I drink I wake up the next morning in bed not remembering the last part of the night.

My biggest problem is that once I'm hammered, I like to go out and socialize.........so as you can guess I'm often traveling the streets at night driving my car when most people wouldnt be able to walk.

I'm currently 6 days sober.

Thank you for listening.

CarolD

6 days is a good start for your new sober life...
Congratulations!

If you have read my post ...you may know I use AA as
my program for recovery...been working great for me.

Do you have any plans for staying sober?

Welcome to our Alcoholism Forum..

Snoug

Id also like to welcome you. Being new here myself i was overwhelmed by the nice response i got from the people here. As for online support i would say theres nothing better then this forum.

Congrats on 6 days sober that is excellent and I wish you best of luck.

jh1

Wow, some of your post makes me think your my twin. I can relate to the going days being able to control it but then that instance comes and its all over-though i keep going for a few days. And the the 5/7 blackout ratio sounds about right. Anyways, glad your here, so far seems like a really helpful site, at least for me, and nice your 6 days, im 5 almost 6. Keep it up gl

Brandeeno

Thanks for responding,

I'm actually committed to my weight lifting as I've done so off and on for the last 12 years, so hopefully that will help.

It's when the weekend rolls aroung I have major issues. I can actually go a week at a time with nothing, no withdrawl symptoms, nothing.

But once I get bored and buy that first 5th/Pint/etc., I'm basically screwed for the next 4-5 days because that's how my drinking pattern tends to work...........the sad thing is I KNOW THIS, but it's the same nasty pattern over and over............3 days on 4 days off, 4 days on 8 days off, 2 days on 2 days off, etc.

I guess you'd call that a binge drinker, but it's so often and routine I know it's something more.

jh1

Exactly the same as me,ha. I mean if you think about how much we prob drink in those 4 days its disturbing and startling considering i used to get a good buzz off a 6 pack. I'd say our trend is definitely alcoholic-because there is no specific alcoholic trend-i dont think. Though i used to think i wasn't alcoholic because i didn't need it everyday, it was kind of a defense i put up when people would say i am, ha, but they were right there's no doubt i am.

Brandeeno

so what's your best way of coping with Friday nights after a long week of work and all you want to do is get buzzed/drunk and go socialize with women??

I hate to say it, but finding hobbies doesn't work anymore once 7pm Friday night hits.........I automatically transform into somebody else and need to drink and socialize.

Snoug

Gosh i hear you about the friday night thing. Its so boring during the week and on the weekend (which suppost to be time off to relax and have some fun) and theres nothing to do.

Thing i realise though is the weekends when I have not drank have always been the weekends where i feel rested and satisfied. When i drink the moment i wake up the next morning I feel like even worse then i was during the week.

jh1

Im in a little different situation now-I recently got done with grad school and am in that looking for employment period, a long one at that. So, ultimately any night could be a night i go out, but for me recently i had been staying in drinking a lot, then id also go out too. But, yea most of my friends who work full time cant wait till friday to go out and binge...idk what im going to do when i do get a full time job because i know frustration builds up during the week and thats like all to look forward to. As for now, I'm going to try to just not go to situations where i know ill drink. so yea i guess im not going to be hanging out with my bros much. Its not going to be the greatest i admit, but gotta focus on the real goal. As for what im going to do, probably dust off my ps3 videogame system and play, haha, sad but anything to get my mind away from going out.

yeahgr8

Hey Brandeeno congrats on the 6 days:-)

Keep it up man and keep coming back here!

Your comment about socialising really hit a spot, i spent the last 6 years in a small place south spain called Gibraltar and after getting my drinking done i would like to go and socialize...at the only casino there until 4 am!!!

I went back 4 weeks ago, ive only been sober for 9 weeks, and i bumped into the casino dorector in town who was telling me about the new premises they are opening and how i was defo invited to the VIP launch on the 21st January...hmmm think i might give that one a miss?!

Oh well onwards and upwards heres to a week for you:-)

Tazman53

Congrats on 6 days sober, like Carol I have used AA to stay sober, not only sober, but happily sober with a whole new circle of sober friends to do things with. I tried the "I'll exercise to stay sober deal" many times before I got into AA.

You see the problem I had with exercise was..... it gets boring, I would get feeling good physically, get bored of exercising, and figure what the heck, a few drinks will stop me from being bored....... the cycle began again.

staynalive

It is kind of a trade off (entertained/sick or bored/healthy). I hope we can get to the point of being content/healthy. I've done a killer workout and then straight to just one beer to relax. Of course I'd get trashed and not eat or hydrate...talk about being sore the next few days, lol.

jh1

idk for now the working out thing is going to be one of my big saving graces. I have forever done the workout 3/4 days then blow all my gains on binges, rinse, repeat. So stupid, get feeling good, drinking protein putting up more weight then just go f it up. I know that, and now that im really trying to stay sober I think the changes im going to see are going to be way better than ive seen in my stagnant past. Im setting goals to lower bodyfat by quite a bit and put on 5-10 pounds of muscle which i can never do because i binge, dont eat or eat ****** and any gains are in the *******. The bad side of working out is i have a mentality right now that if i do like 3-5 days in a row of exercise i deserve a night of drinking-haha-i know ****** up logic. But i know i can do so much more if i just cut out the drinking

Brandeeno

Is your gym 24hr? That's been my saving grace the last week as everytime I get the urge to go buy a bottle, I head over to gym.

If I've already worked out earlier in the day, I hit cardio and socialize for an hour. I always end the visit with 15min in the steamroom......clears everything (cravings, head, sinuses, toxins, etc.)

In fact it's kinda turned into my new AA as it's surrounded by health conscious people and is very motivating to be in that atmosphere.

I already know that's where I'm heading at 7:00 Friday night!

jh1

hell yea 24 hour fitness! Yea, thats a good idea to go hit it up later on friday and sat. Im prob gonna go even later cuz i could see myself comin home after workin out and stopping for some booze. but yea working out for me is going to play a huge part. also good idea on going twice-actually really good idea because i have my days free too so i like to go then--then i coudld just go back to hit up cardio later. Yea i was thinkin about the aa thing but i really want to go to one that has people like 25-35 to relate to-people who do the same things i do-nothing against older people but i mean i want to hopefully find some chill people to hang with some nights id usually booze. Hard to find at this age, haha. But yea 24 hr is the ****