Rowan

sooo meetings are free - not everyone has the luxury of going to rehab. What's keeping you from going to meetings? Or are you just coming up with excuses why you can't get sober?

Homer38

il admit i am! gimme the power? please?:day4

itiswhatitis...

homer/patrick - i'm a long time poster on friends and families but read a lot everywhere here - i just wanted to let you know that we have anthem bcbs and my husband just went into inpatient today at 8:30 - our insurance is paying 100% - we did have a 5,000 out of pocket max which was covered this year - with a dui and head injury there was that charge - a hip replacement - well suffice it to say we owed well over 5,000 out of pocket ...

just wanted to share - his boss fired him yesterday at 8 am - for drinking - in the 24 hours since he has seen an attorney for foreclosure on our house - filed for bankruptcy - seen a counselor - and checked into inpatient - he has been attending aa for well over a year - his boss (a friend for 15 some years) said if husband had come to him and let him know he needed to take some time off to get some help he would have been behind him 100% - my husband thought if he had to take time off he would have been fired - funny how things work out...

i hope you'll ge t the help you need - i haven't had a job outside of raising our four kids for almost 20 years - i've had to say the serenity prayer alot today - we have insurace coverage through the month of december - so today we hope...

love,
s

Kellye C

It's time to make a choice about how badly do you want this thing. Are you just paying lip service because things have gotten bad at home AGAIN? Or are you finally ready to surrender? Based on your answer to Rowan, which made no sense to me, I can't tell.

You've been given some options. Which ones have you checked out and what were you told? What is your insurance company saying about this? As was suggested earlier, call your local AA intergroup for a list of LOCAL detox facilities and then call them to see if they will work with your insurance.

If you truly want to quit you WILL go to any lengths. If you don't you will find excuses why the options put before you won't work. It's your call Patrick so what's it gonna be?

Pinkcuda

We talk about success rates here all the time when it comes to different programs. Unfortunately AA takes the brunt of it.
Truth be told, Rehabs have a dismal 5% success rate just like every other program.
It only leads me to believe one thing.
Only 5% of the people who need to get sober have an honest desire to do something about it.
Rehab isn't a place where you go click your heels together three times and walk out "fixed". Rehab just permanently places the ball back on your side of the net.

Dee74

the powers with you Patrick - as others have said...you'll lose everything eventually anyway....and that's if you're *lucky*, man. There's a long line of dead alkies with excuses.

Don't wait - check out Kellye C's post above - call the local AA intergroup and start from there

if things are that hand to mouth for yr family you've got no business drinking anyway, right?

D

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

Well, divorce can wreak havoc on the finances. How much longer will your wife and son hang in there with you? How will they support themselves if you are dead Patrick?

Please surrender and get the help that you need.

Cathy31

Oh Patrick you make me want to weep! I guess at least your denial and continuing self destruction keep some of us sober.

Tazman53

Patrick sit down and take an honest look at what is happening in your life now!

If you continue to drink do you think your wife is going to stay with you?

If you continue to drink do you think your son is going to want anything to do with you?

If you continue to drink do you think your going to be able to keep your job?

If you go to rehab and stay sober your wife might stay with you!!!!

If you go to rehab and stay sober your son might love and respect you again!

If you go to rehab and stay sober you may be able to keep your job!


Patrick have you called any one?

Do you just plan on sitting on that pity pot and seeking pity form people? Keep sitting on that pity pot Patrick and it will not take long before you will lose your wife, your son, your job................................. then death will come next.

Patrick people are holding thier hands out to help you, why don't you take thier hand?

You have to get off of your ass and do something, call somebody!!!!

least

Your first post asked for help in finding inpatient treatment, then you are given a lot of suggestions and then say you "just can't". Why not?? How bad do you want to stop drinking beer "on a daily basis"? I went to rehab three times this year but didn't quit drinking til I was truly ready to stop and wanted sobriety more than I wanted to keep on drinking. I used AA, SR, and a free addiction counselor to finally get and stay sober. It can be done - ya just "gotta wanna". How badly do you want it?

bstt03

I am confused. Didn't your post say to help you find an inpatient you can afford???? Later you say you can't go away to one. Which one is it? Can you take a leave from work, disability of some kind? And I know it may be hard to leave your son, family etc but in the long run - would it not be for the better?

monkey1

Patrick, I don't know you or your story, I'm pretty new her at SR. But, it looks like this has been a long time coming. I understand the pressure you feel to be "there" to provide for your family and earn a paycheck. But, like others have said, how long will that be able to continue of you don't address this crisis-level problem NOW?

I too, have been putting off treatment, coming up with excuse after excuse. But in the end I have surrendered to the fact that I MUST go to inpatient treatment, because otherwise I am not going to stop and I will die. I am going to detox in early January (insurance, state paid, or out of pocket with a big bill to deal with... I'll figure it out, I MUST.)

You've asked for options, folks have provided the options for you, time to put on the long-pants and make a move. Stop thinking about it and do it. You'll be glad you did. Take care and be well.

LosingmyMisery

I know that you have gotten to the point of desperation and helplessness many times. You do what it is you think you must do to get out of the situation. Things get a bit better, than you go back to drinking. You've got to go that extra mile, Patrick. If you don't, you will lose everything. Your job, your family, your life. Come on...end the misery and make yourself well. I know you can do it. If I can so can you.

You want help, but you don't want to make the efforts. It is easy to see what the results will be with that approach. I know it is scary and there are obstacles, but overcome those obstacles and you will benefit. I'm sure your work will understand if you talk with someone from HR. Your family will surely be ecstatic if you go and work on changing your life. Don't look for excuses on why you can't change. Find reasons why you must change. Good luck...

problemchild

When will you realize it's a crisis of destruction ????????

NoMoBeer

(((Patrick)))
I don't get on here much, but have been skimming the threads (and hoping I'd find out what you're up to)...

Sorry you are having troubles... bottom line, man -- do want to drink or die? I guess the further on down the road of drinking you go, the narrower that decision gets... and then at some point you lose choice. It sounds like you are looking for an inpatient so that "someone else" can get you sober. Bottom line is YOU must make that decision (be willing), change some of your belief patterns, make the decision to be sober, and TAKE ACTION.

I have been really lax in my AA attendance, but reading the posts on SR has me planning on upping my meetings... Once I get over this cold/flu thing...

Anyway, Patrick -- I'll pray for you and hope that you give yourself the gift of sobriety this Christmas...

Ken