Your opinion on what you view as good quality sobriety here at SR.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Your opinion on what you view as good quality sobriety here at SR.
Just my opinion, but what I see in a person on SR that has good quality sobriety is the following:
1. They share thier Experience, Strength, and hope.
2. They share what worked/works for them.
3. They support those seeking support no matter what program of recovery they are using or not using.
4. They are loving and tolerant of other people and thier paths to sobriety.
5. They have no need to critisize other people or programs because thier method of recovery is solid for them.
6. They are respectful of other people, thier beliefs, and thier programs because thier method of recovery is solid for them.
7. They answer questions about the program they are working.
8. They do not have the need to degrade other programs or methods of recovery because their method or program is solid.
There are a lot of people here at SR that meet the above in my opinion, some work thier own program, some are in AA, WFS, and other programs.
Heck I have seen folks even suggest a program to someone that they them selfs were not using that they felt may work for some one else. To me that says a lot about ones program/method.
This is not all inclusive for me, but just highlights some of my opinions of good sobriety.
What do you all see as signs of good sobriety?
1. They share thier Experience, Strength, and hope.
2. They share what worked/works for them.
3. They support those seeking support no matter what program of recovery they are using or not using.
4. They are loving and tolerant of other people and thier paths to sobriety.
5. They have no need to critisize other people or programs because thier method of recovery is solid for them.
6. They are respectful of other people, thier beliefs, and thier programs because thier method of recovery is solid for them.
7. They answer questions about the program they are working.
8. They do not have the need to degrade other programs or methods of recovery because their method or program is solid.
There are a lot of people here at SR that meet the above in my opinion, some work thier own program, some are in AA, WFS, and other programs.
Heck I have seen folks even suggest a program to someone that they them selfs were not using that they felt may work for some one else. To me that says a lot about ones program/method.
This is not all inclusive for me, but just highlights some of my opinions of good sobriety.
What do you all see as signs of good sobriety?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
Taz....I don't think about it in terms of good sobriety...but I do find that I relate more to some posts than others and that some posts are more helpful to me.
I figure that those posts that aren't helpful to me, well it probably is for someone else.
I do very much appreciate those who are able to share with respect and caring. Because I am not receptive to "tough love" I tend to not care for it...but you know the truth is there are people who respond much better to that than softenss....so it has it's place too.
Just my thoughts.
I figure that those posts that aren't helpful to me, well it probably is for someone else.
I do very much appreciate those who are able to share with respect and caring. Because I am not receptive to "tough love" I tend to not care for it...but you know the truth is there are people who respond much better to that than softenss....so it has it's place too.
Just my thoughts.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Because I am not receptive to "tough love" I tend to not care for it...but you know the truth is there are people who respond much better to that than softenss....so it has it's place too.
Another Day in Paradise
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Upland, CA
Posts: 900
All I ask from those that share is sincerity. We are all the product of different paths toward a common goal. If an individual is willing to share their route and the success and the failure that THEY encountered then they offer a lesson for all of us. When the author brings his or her life lessons to this forum for all of us to share in I am better for their writings, it is when a member tries to make a point based in antidotal “evidence” or an opinion that is then used to denigrate another’s choice, that I am troubled.
I believe that when someone has time in sobriety, they have tried methods that HAVE worked and certainly have also tried things that DIDN'T work. Opinions are great and certainly should be considered, but nothing is more helpful to a new member of this site than how others have achieved the goals that the new person is trying to reach. Too many times it seems that I read posts that expound on what is wrong with a certain program and how the path to sobriety is much easier using this way or that way, all stated in an emphatic manner that leads one to believe this pronouncement is based on years of sobriety. However, when I look at the individuals profile I see a sobriety date of 3 weeks! Certainly everyone should participate and we all have something to add, but I appreciate the person who qualifies their input with the experience that gave them this particular view.
Just my musings,
Jon
I believe that when someone has time in sobriety, they have tried methods that HAVE worked and certainly have also tried things that DIDN'T work. Opinions are great and certainly should be considered, but nothing is more helpful to a new member of this site than how others have achieved the goals that the new person is trying to reach. Too many times it seems that I read posts that expound on what is wrong with a certain program and how the path to sobriety is much easier using this way or that way, all stated in an emphatic manner that leads one to believe this pronouncement is based on years of sobriety. However, when I look at the individuals profile I see a sobriety date of 3 weeks! Certainly everyone should participate and we all have something to add, but I appreciate the person who qualifies their input with the experience that gave them this particular view.
Just my musings,
Jon
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
[QUOTE]What do you all see as signs of good sobriety?[QUOTE]
hmmmm.
That's a good question, Tazzle.
How to go about describing it, I mean.
Because we all know - we know it when we see it.
Often longevity has little to do with it.
Nor does the person's wealth/status ... abundance of toys...
New cars flashy jobs... big house....
none of that matters.
Not when it comes to sobriety.
Which has very little to do with not drinking.
There's a certain... energy.
Some people call it something in their eye...
but for me, it's more 'something' in their actions.
"If you want what we've got and are willing..."
The people who 'have it'...
don't have to preach or argue.
They just 'have it'.
And it shows.
In everything they do.
They don't HAVE to talk about it.
And they don't need your/my attention
to acknowledge they've GOT it, either.
Cuz they walked in with it.
They already know.
And they share it.
Quite humbly, in fact.
hmmmm.
That's a good question, Tazzle.
How to go about describing it, I mean.
Because we all know - we know it when we see it.
Often longevity has little to do with it.
Nor does the person's wealth/status ... abundance of toys...
New cars flashy jobs... big house....
none of that matters.
Not when it comes to sobriety.
Which has very little to do with not drinking.
There's a certain... energy.
Some people call it something in their eye...
but for me, it's more 'something' in their actions.
"If you want what we've got and are willing..."
The people who 'have it'...
don't have to preach or argue.
They just 'have it'.
And it shows.
In everything they do.
They don't HAVE to talk about it.
And they don't need your/my attention
to acknowledge they've GOT it, either.
Cuz they walked in with it.
They already know.
And they share it.
Quite humbly, in fact.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 413
Originally Posted by barb dwyer 
The people who 'have it'...
don't have to preach or argue.
They just 'have it'.
And it shows.
In everything they do.
They don't HAVE to talk about it.
And they don't need your/my attention
to acknowledge they've GOT it, either.
Cuz they walked in with it.
They already know.
And they share it.
Quite humbly, in fact.
don't have to preach or argue.
They just 'have it'.
And it shows.
In everything they do.
They don't HAVE to talk about it.
And they don't need your/my attention
to acknowledge they've GOT it, either.
Cuz they walked in with it.
They already know.
And they share it.
Quite humbly, in fact.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
thank you, tk -
although I *do* get fed up with all the arguing.
When I can't take it any more -
I go someplace else and hang out.
My being able to deal with ... all that repetitive expostulating stuff...
is directly resultant of my spiritual condition
in that moment.
No one else's... mine.
But every now and then ...
this old dog will bite.
We're not popular because we're unique -
We're popular... because we're typical.
When we remember that ... we can stay on task.
And the task is ... sobriety.
although I *do* get fed up with all the arguing.
When I can't take it any more -
I go someplace else and hang out.
My being able to deal with ... all that repetitive expostulating stuff...
is directly resultant of my spiritual condition
in that moment.
No one else's... mine.
But every now and then ...
this old dog will bite.
We're not popular because we're unique -
We're popular... because we're typical.
When we remember that ... we can stay on task.
And the task is ... sobriety.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
[QUOTE=barb dwyer;1940519]
The people who 'have it'...
don't have to preach or argue.
They just 'have it'.
And it shows.
In everything they do.
They don't HAVE to talk about it.
And they don't need your/my attention
to acknowledge they've GOT it, either.
Cuz they walked in with it.
"Some of us good-old-timers become so humble, so loving and so tolerant that we are of no earthly use to anyone"
(Hank Johnson. Famous open-talk speaker)
The people who 'have it'...
don't have to preach or argue.
They just 'have it'.
And it shows.
In everything they do.
They don't HAVE to talk about it.
And they don't need your/my attention
to acknowledge they've GOT it, either.
Cuz they walked in with it.
(Hank Johnson. Famous open-talk speaker)
God's Kid
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 1,820
The topic made me laugh. So did the above quote.
I think while I could indentify what I think 'good soberity' is in my local AA group, on here (for me) it is actually not possible.
Body language says a lot about a person and so does action.
Neither of which I can see on here.
For all any of you guys/gals know I may be a cross dressing, joint toking, jack daniels gluggling man who comes on here and spouts off whatever I feel like. Or even copy and paste stuff from other sites etc...
How would any of you honestly know if I wasn't or not???
Alcoholics are sensitive people and our feelings get hurt very easily. An off the cuff comment made to me at a meeting, would probably not hold the weight of the same thing said to me here.
I also think (as human beings) we have good days and bad days. And our postings probably reflect that too. Good attitude/bad attitude.
It can be easier to forget that what may offend/tick off 10 of us who do post may actually be helping 5 people who don't post.
And lastly, I would like to vote for myself as an example of someone who has good soberity on SR. Oh and Carol of course too.
I think while I could indentify what I think 'good soberity' is in my local AA group, on here (for me) it is actually not possible.
Body language says a lot about a person and so does action.
Neither of which I can see on here.
For all any of you guys/gals know I may be a cross dressing, joint toking, jack daniels gluggling man who comes on here and spouts off whatever I feel like. Or even copy and paste stuff from other sites etc...
How would any of you honestly know if I wasn't or not???
Alcoholics are sensitive people and our feelings get hurt very easily. An off the cuff comment made to me at a meeting, would probably not hold the weight of the same thing said to me here.
I also think (as human beings) we have good days and bad days. And our postings probably reflect that too. Good attitude/bad attitude.
It can be easier to forget that what may offend/tick off 10 of us who do post may actually be helping 5 people who don't post.
And lastly, I would like to vote for myself as an example of someone who has good soberity on SR. Oh and Carol of course too.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,785
I value the sharing of experience strength and hope. The fact that people here didn't give up on me when I felt hopeless made me feel that I might have a chance at lasting sobriety.
The enthusiasm of the members for each other really touches my heart and brings a happy tear to my eye. I come here for strength and inspiration and I always find it. I come here in good times and bad, to share my joy and my sorrow. I am a better person for my association with everyone here!
To help others stay sober helps me stay sober!
:ghug
The enthusiasm of the members for each other really touches my heart and brings a happy tear to my eye. I come here for strength and inspiration and I always find it. I come here in good times and bad, to share my joy and my sorrow. I am a better person for my association with everyone here!
To help others stay sober helps me stay sober!
:ghug
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Omak WA
Posts: 1,049
We attract each other....why??? I wonder why I gravatate towards certain people & have found more often than not that person has had an addiction problem of somekind or is having the problem currently.
True...being on the Internet is not the same as seeing people face to face & body language to body language....but that is one of the best ways to let someone know that we are truly working on our sobriety....the mouth may lie but in most cases the eyes & body do not lie.
kelsh :ghug2
True...being on the Internet is not the same as seeing people face to face & body language to body language....but that is one of the best ways to let someone know that we are truly working on our sobriety....the mouth may lie but in most cases the eyes & body do not lie.
kelsh :ghug2
problem with authority
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 870
HANK IS THE BEST!!!!
[QUOTE=Boleo;1940941]
"Some of us good-old-timers become so humble, so loving and so tolerant that we are of no earthly use to anyone"
(Hank Johnson. Famous open-talk speaker)
[QUOTE=Boleo;1940941]
Originally Posted by barb dwyer
"Some of us good-old-timers become so humble, so loving and so tolerant that we are of no earthly use to anyone"
(Hank Johnson. Famous open-talk speaker)
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