flower44

I'm starting this on Thursday of this week. They meet for 3 1/2 hours 3 times per week. Hope this works as inpatient rehab just wasn't for me. Why does it seem like some of the counselor's at rehab are a bit on the mean side. I know, I know - tough love. I'm just a nice person and have some trouble with this approach!

tommyk

I think they can appear 'mean' because soooooo many people listen, learn, and then go back out and use.

Counselors get frustrated a lot, I think.

I respond really well to 'tough love' though, that's just me.

Ananda

I had a problem in that i don't believe in "tough love" as a suscessful tool for sobriety, but I just made no bones about it to the concelors or fellow inmates...and it didn't end up being much of an issue...they didn't get all tough on me. Hope you have the same expereince.

flower44

I hope so too ananda! Also forgot to mention that in addition to the 3 inpatient meetings per week, I also have to attend 2 AA meetings per week, have a daily Breathalyzer and 1 urine screening per week. I am going to be a rehab'n fool ya'll!!!

Anna

Flower,

I hope the rehab goes well for you and I do hope the counsellors have compassion. This will be a good opportunity for you to begin to change your life. I wish you well!

CarolD

I did not go to rehab...or de tox...or OP
Sooo....I can not share on my experiences with them.

I absolutely know that I have a fantastic life
by daily using God and the AA Steps.

Hope you will also find your solution...

flower44

so if anyone were to offer advice - should I let the counselors know right off the bat to lay off of the meanness?? I am not a mean person. I have no DCFS issues. No probation or DUI issues. I am going on my own free will. HELP!!

MyPaperAnchor

That bolded part made me LOL.

I think they might come across sometimes as mean because what they do is an incredibly hard job...and there's that little fact that they're dealing with life and death. The customers die if they don't "get it".

I got out of 3-week inpatient treatment in April, and going in was the best decision I ever made. Best wishes in your recovery journey, Flower44. It's what you make of it.

FreeinMilwaukee

I would talk about your fears in the group setting. Processing your feelings in the context of the group can be very helpful. I have been in group therapy before but never group rehab, so I can only hope your experience will be as good as mine was. You say you are going on Thursday? I'll say a prayer for you that day.

flower44

I will do the best that I can. I still feel like a loser though.

Tommyh

so if anyone were to offer advice - should I let the counselors know right off the bat to lay off of the meanness??


well,it don`t make much sense to tell the counselors how to counsel you.You go there asking for help,take what they give you,and be glad you can get it.It won`t hurt you as much as the drugs/booze did.

tommyk

Rehab will make you feel like a winner.

At least it did for me.

sobergirl77

Hey let us all know how it goes - I have been considering doing something very similar, except it's called "intensive outpatient group therapy" and it meets 3 times a week for 3 hours. It would be a huge commitment so I'm considering it and praying about it before making a decision.

Good luck and let us know how it works out for you!

Tazman53

A properly trained counsleor will apply tough love when it is needed, tough love is not a one size fits all thing and if properly trained a counselor knows this.

The best way to not have any tough love applied to you is VERY, VERY simple. Just follow suggestions!!!

It is just like going to elementary school, did you ever see a teacher use tough love on a kid who paid attention in class, did thier home work and turned all their assignments in on time? I never have.

Put your self in the couselors shoes, how would you react to someone coming to you for help telling you how to help them?

I know I would not take to kindly to a student telling me how to teach them, would you?

Look if you go there with the right attitude, pay attention, participate, and do your assignments, you will have no tough love applied directly to you.

jjaaam

This is my same answer to a similar thread...so please bear with me!

Just from my experience, no rehab or IOP will work unless YOU WANT IT TO.

For me, IOP was really not a whole lot different from residential rehab except you got to go home at night. The bottom line was the same - they will teach you about your disease and then say the only way to continue with sobriety is to go to AA.

At one period in the last few months, I went to residential for a week. Got out and drank on the way home. Was in IOP for a week and a half and got kicked out because I contined to drink. Went right back into another residential program the next day for two weeks...got out and drank on the way home. I went to their IOP for four weeks...and spent the first 2.5 weeks drunk almost every night. Something finally happened and I am about 45 days sober now...I guess I was just FINALLY READY.

I know for a FACT that every time I said "Oh...AA just isn't for me...residential isn't for me...IOP isn't for me" it was just a veiled excuse because deep down I KNEW I was going to drink again.

Again...this is just my experience, so please do not take offense to my opinions.

RobbyRobot

yeah, you sure can, flower. true tough love requires your standing approval and you and the staff work it out together. simply tell them if they go to far you will have an honest shut-down response and then that will have to be dealt with as well. if they are useful staff, they should have no problem helping you through the shutdown and get you going again. nothing to be embarrassed about.

of course, only shut down honestly, no game playing, lol. and when you do shut down, dealing with the shutdown is very helpful just don't argue your way into a confrontation and be as brave as you can. you're gonna be fine, really. i am a retired staff, so i know a little bit about it....

BigB4Sobriety78

I am currently doing intensive outpatient rehab myself and I think it really works.
When I meet the head person she was/is a real hard ass and I am not the only one who knows this but we all understand why she is. The last time I seen her she said she was proud of me and that coming from her made me feel good.

CarolD

BigB4Sobriety78 ...
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