Pinkcuda

Tough question. I don't know is my answer. I was drunk every day for 20 years so I have only sobered up once. The transition was so gradual that it was hard to notice a change. I don't know if I never got hangovers or if I just got used to them. Either way I felt good in the mornings as a norm.
This being sober stuff really threw a wrench into my system. Things actually got worse before they got better. There were times where I was questioning myself in my decision to sober up. Here I was, some sober guy with a Wife and Kids to support and I had no idea what I was doing. I couldn't even deal with my own life let alone deal with someone elses. So the transition was difficult. Depression set in really bad for about the first year or so. I was prescribed anti depressants. I took two of them and they didn't work so I stopped taking them. (kind of like A.A.,hint, hint) I'll be honest with you, It was tough. The thought of quitting my quitting crossed my mind more than once.
Fast forward a couple more years and things are great. Best decision I ever made and everybody involved is a winner. The 12 promises do come true in every sense.
Money in the bank, finished projects around the house, I can remember my sons Teachers name most of the time. Life is good. My only regret is missing so much of it.

Sugah

Well, Paulos, I got sober and so did my dad. I tried doing it the way he did it a number of times, and nothing really changed for me. See, he just "put the plug in the jug," as I've heard it put. He was still pretty miserable. I took some action and tried to change the me that wanted so badly to drink. I did it through the steps, and I won't say that's the only way, but it's the only way that worked for me (yes, I tried other methods). I found peace, purpose, learned how to laugh again, learned how to enjoy being around other people again, learned how to be open-minded enough to learn again! He stayed inside his own head and fought with anyone who tried to challenge his misery -- and he did it for twenty-four years. That just wasn't a desirable way for me to get "sober," so I suggest, if you're really serious about this, do something -- I won't tell you my way is the only way, but the drunk without the drink and no other changes isn't, in most cases, a person I'd want to be.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

chip

Paulos,
I've been without a drink for 26 months now. I'm not "recovered". All those years that I drank, I never learned how to cope with real life. I'm learning, every day, how to accept life on life's terms. Sometimes it's hard.

Many of us need to learn new coping skills to deal with life. Alcohol was a miracle soultion for all my problems at one point. Alcohol allowed me to numb my emotions, and put off dealing with pain. With my drinking, I stunted my emotional growth because I used an artifical method to change my feelings (alcohol).

I started drinking when I was 17. When I quit, I had the emotional maturity of a 17 year old. A couple of drinks could change my whole world, and I loved it. I found courage, strength, confidence etc... in the bottle. For most of my life, I hated the way I felt. I found that alcohol could instantly change this. I always wanted to feel better, and alcohol facilitated this.

Now that I don't drink, I'm learning how to deal with my emotions in ways that "normal" people learned years ago. Instead of drinking and artificially enhancing or numbing my emotions, I've got to deal with them head-on.

AA has really helped me find recovery. I believe there is a difference between being "dry" and being in "recovery". I think in "recovery", people try to foster personal growth so they can outgrow the need to drink. In my recovery, I'm trying to get beyond the things that have held me back and made me drink.

Now to answer your question:
I think I got sober when I learned to accept the way I feel, and faced it withoug using a substance to change it.
chip

Pinkcuda

I hope you knocked on some wood when you said that.

Paulos

I just think how my brain will recover after a month or two you know with my slurred speech, my clouded thinking and such... I just want the benefit.

CarolD

It's hard to be patient I know.

My first discovery of my brain power improving
was about 6 weeks. I could again work the
Washington Post and NY Times crosswords
..but as before
the Sunday Times were not finished!

Why not Google for info on how to increase
your brain/memory functions?

Glad to see you here again Paulos...

BTW we had a major SR crash while you
were gone and that's why your orginal post
to start this thread is missing. Sorry!

Tazman53

Paulos do not expect over night miracles, your brain can take up to a year to fully recover, but it does get better every day, that is why it is so important to just take life as a whole one day at a time.

When we start setting goals for a month or 2 months and we do not reach that goal we tend to view our selfs as failures, this is not true, if we stayed sober that entire time we have not failed, we may not have gotten what we wanted, but we have not failed.

Paulos would you like to be a success every day?

It is simple, every day when you wake up make a decision to just not drink for that day, forget about tomorrow or a month from then, just focus on that day. When you go to bed that night if you have not had a drink then you are a success!!!! Keep doing this and before you know it the fog will have cleared, you will be feeling great physically, the only thing left to work on is the mental portion and that is the hardest thing to change.

The mental portion takes more time then anything else, but it does come the same way, by simply not taking a drink one day at a time and working on changing your self one day at a time.