zJoe99

Hope everyone is doing well.

Don't know if anyone remembers me. I was posting here a while back.
This web site was a big help to me. It's good to see a lot of familiar names still posting here.

Unfortunately, I started drinking again and left AA and my recovery friends. I'm worse off now than when I originally came here. Guess you all know the drill. Seems every jag is worse than the last. I'm a mess but I'm still alive.

I want to quit again. I can't pay for a detox or rehab. But, I quit once before with you all's help. Started posting here and then got into AA and got a sponsor. I made it 45 days before I relapsed. 45 days may not sound like much but that was the best 45 days I'd had in many years. I want to try again.

Anyways, I hereby officially announce my intention and desire to stop drinking, lol. I'm sick right now and nursing on some beer. God willing, tommorrow will be day 1 for me.

Joe

parentrecovers

welcome back, joe. i appreciate your honesty. now ditch the beer and get to an aa meeting..i'm a mom - i can say things like that..

blessings, and keep posting - k

zJoe99

Thanks "Mom", lol. I can't ditch the beer today but it will be gone tommorrow. I promise. I'm coming off a pretty long, rough bender. I'm sick as a dog and I'm a little afraid of dt's.

CarolD

Joe...glad you are here again with a resolve for a fresh start!

You know the drill...get back on the recovery path.

Welcome!

Tazman53

Joe welcome back brother! Both to SR & AA!

First things first, if you are worried about DTs you should be getting ahold of a doctor, if that is not a possiblity then I would be calling your sponsor, tell him what is up and see if he knows how to help someone detox the old fashioned way.

zJoe99

Hey Taz,

Thanks for the welcome. I think I'll be ok. I'm just very sick right now. I have some beer here to ease me down. Hopefully, I'll relax enough here shortly to try to sleep a bit.

I'll call my sponsor tommorrow. Man, I'm not looking forward to the next few days.

mike_mass

Joe,

Welcome back. I think 45 days was an awesome accomplishment.

Tazman53

Keep that in mind next time the urge to drink hits again!! LOL

Just something I work every day is step one, the only step that has to be done perfect I have heard in order to stay sober, before my morning prayer I remind myself that I am an alcoholic and am powerless of alcohol and if I drink again my life will become unmanageable again!

Picking up that 24 hour chip and sharing why you relapsed will help others as well as yourself.

zJoe99

Thanks, Mike. It was a big achievement for me. Unfortunately, I didn't value it as much as I should have at the time. Seemed like everyone in my AA meetings had far more sobriety than me. I came to discount my little 45 days as insignificant. It wasn't insignificant though. It was a miracle. I should have valued it more.

zJoe99

I should probably tatoo that on my forehead. I'm a very forgetfull alcoholic.

Tazman53

Joe I view every day sober as a miracle and the last time I checked they do not have miracles in the discount bargain bin!

Talk to some old timers, they will tell you that the only day sober they have is the one they are in.

Tazman53

Trust me you are not alone..... I have a feeling that is one reason sponsors drill daily routines into our heads!!!

barb dwyer

welcome back, zJoe!!!

nandm

"Failure is not necessarily at the end of the road. Many times it is the beginning of a new and more exciting trip."
Zig Ziglar

May your road of sobriety be a long and fruitful one.

GrouchoTheCat

zJoe,

I have relapsed many times, it has been worse each and every time. This time I had over 7 months, the longest I have been sober in 15 years.

I feel for you and as has been suggested, please call your sponsor and/or get to a meeting.

Monday I hit 30 days again and I am very proud of that. I can't change the past so I try not to dwell on it.

I have been to a minimum of one meeting a day this time and as I am not working today, I will be to 3 meetings.

I have never before done 90 meetings in 90 days before, but this time I am determend.

I call my sponsor every day and at least 2 other members of my group.

As Taz mentioned, miracles are not in the bargan bin. I have to do the work.

I want sobriety today, more than ever.

Best to you Joe,

Ted

Tazman53

So far I have found that if I stay strictly in today I have a better day sober over all and it results in tomorrow usually being a good today because I focused on today instead of worrying about tomorrow or trying to beat myself up for the past.

parentrecovers

thanks for bumping this up, taz. i was saying a morning prayer for all the day oners - and joe was on my list..

Tazman53

PR you are a dear, just in case no one else told you today you are a special lady.

parentrecovers

thanks, taz. all i can do is turn it over and pray - i have no power of this disease.

i do have hope though.

mom k

TINLIZZY

ZJoe -

How are you doing? Please keep posting!

TinLizzy