Joi

Okay; I need your help. I'm starting a new job teaching and it's taken me 3 years to get back to doing what I'd worked all my life to do before I allowed alcohol run my life. That lil' ******* still calls my name, but I know when I feel week and I can rely upon you all. I also realize that when I obtain these victories that my habit is to reach for a drink. I know this is simply another excercise in rebehaving. Here is what I need from you guys. Humor is my new drug of choice. When I can laugh at the absurdity of horrible drunken situations I put myself in I find solice. Can ya'll share some "when I was drunk" stories with me and make me laugh? Please don't take offense. I'm not attempting to make light of the seriousness of this disease. I'm just thankful it didn't do more damage than it did. That being said, "on with the show" When I was drunk and pulled over and arrested for dui the officer said "why were you driving? I actually said, "Well, officer I couldn't walk."

barb dwyer

I have actually said the words " hello, ociffer" ...

this website is becoming laden with my own drunk stories... I am currently working on making myself some funny sobriety stories.

Live

I think recovery follies has some.

baggervance

october 29 is my loving wifes birthday this was year of 2000. She took both girls to a halloween party so I went to the beer joint,Bout 11oclock she called and said you know tonights my birthday cmon home NOW! Isaid on my way hung up the phone and hollard who wants to go to the moose lodge cause it didnt close till 2. On the way home you guessed it D U I. She came to bail me out next mourning and scremed I CANT BELIEVE YOU GOT A D U I ON MY BIRTHDAY NOW YOUR IN JAIL AND CANT DRIVE FOR A YEAR AND THE INSURANCE IS GOING THROUGH THE ROOF. I said baby ther aniy many men that would go through this much hell for your birthday present.

CarolD

Hi Joi....

Here is the link for the Follies

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/recovery-follies/

I am so pleased to see you
will be a teacher again.
Way To Go!

Tazman53

One of the funniest drunk stories I ever heard was Winston Churchill was at some fancy get together and there was even some royalty there.

One of the aristocrats came up to Churchill and with a look of disgust on her face said "Mr. Churchill, you are drunk!" to which Churchill replied "Madaam when I wake up in the morning I will be sober, when you wake up in the morning you will still be ugly!"

collinsmi

Still mortified by most of the stuff I did!

Joi

Thank you all so much. I met the drill team I'm coaching friday night and the police were called. Well the girls posted the party on my space and chaos ensued. the moms, cops, girls, football players looked at me for something and my response was, "Well, it's not a party till the cops arrive." They like me, and I did it sober. Went to bed sober and woke up giggling, not throwing up. Thank you so much . All of you. Especially Peter, I love his lil rat avatars. And Doug. He cracks me up. And Surley redhead. She gave me hope for this job and I began to pray for it and received it; my prayer for you, surley is to realize fullfillment like youv'e never even dreamed of.

BaldHeadedJohn

I fell off my roof. Not terribly funny to me, but you're all welcome to chuckle!!

Khrobin

was with some friends of mine at a biker bar. across the street from the bar was a little horse ranch with an electric fence around it. (bet you all know where this is going now!!) well one of my buddies and I decided we wanted to go pet the horse!!! we walk across the street, get to the fence, we both look at each other, and aske "I wonder if its turned on" both of us at the same time, grab the fence with both hands, just wraping our fingers around it...it was turned on...was raining some outside also, both of us got quite the jolt!!! didnt really burn ourselfs at all from it, but our hole bodys started twiching with each burst of electricity, lol!!

Joi

You people are simply faaaaaabulous! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. My heart beats a little faster now. I am so thankful for all of you.

GlassPrisoner

I got run over by my own snowmobile once......Yup, drunk as a skunk at 2:00 AM and bucked off at 50 +. Up and over the front, and WHAM !!!!

I went skiing the next day, and a friend says "Your not as aggressive as you usually are...." I say "Well, I don't really want to fall" and pulled up my shirt and sleeves. I was black and blue on an entire arm and most of my torso.

I've rolled a golf cart, but "saved the beer !"