Kellye C

No frizzy, I may be selfish in saying this but there is no way in h*ll I'm paying for alcohol. Alcohol almost killed me and the vast majority of those there will be AA's with varying lengths of sobriety. I just can't and won't do it. I get where you're coming from though but as I said I'm going to be selfish on that one.

Hugs,
Kellye

Golfman

You stick to your guns Kellye. This is the most wonderful day of your life. It will be especially wonderful because it will be alcohol free. Put it on the invitations and don't give it another thought. You can move onto other things and have a clean conscience.

ed

Hush007

And another perk is that all the guests wil actually REMEMBER everything about your wedding, instead of drinking so much they have a blackout.

Tazman53

Hon as Ed said, put it in the invitation and move on, you owe no one any explanation, this is your wedding not theirs.

Congrats to you and the groom, lucky man.

Kellye C

I'll also get to use my famous line that I use on newbies at the sober dances we go to when they are waiting to get up and dance. I fix them with a stare and tell them, hon you're not drinking. They are not going to look any better in an hour or two. They going to look just same as they do right now so get up off your butt and go dance! It startles them at first and then they laugh and go for it (or else I drag them out their myself LOL!)

I'm really looking forward to this!

Hugs,
Kellye

Sugah

I had a booze-free wedding, too, Kelly. There was no question about it, as my husband and I are both in recovery, just like you and your husband-to-be.

Perhaps I took the easy way out. I invited no one who (that I was aware) had a drinking problem and no desire to change it. That left out most of my family, but it was our day, not theirs. Call it selfish, but I was getting married, not twelve stepping. And our friends gave us the most wonderful compliment: "It was like this great party where the two of you just happened to get married." No one, that I'm aware, left without having had a good time.

One of my sponsees, on the other hand, decided to compromise. She also married another recoverying alcoholic, and neither of them were willing to "offend" anyone whom they thought might go against their wishes. She announced to everyone that there was no booze and I think as some sort of pacifier, she put bottles of sparkling apple juice and fluted glasses on each table. Even before the meal was over, she had people openly drinking in the parking lot, and she was beside herself. One of the guys she invited from the program had only a couple weeks sober, and he finally buckled & went out to join them. She can't have that day over again, but she has made some progress in her drive to make everybody happy.

Oh....and just as a side-note: you see my signature line from page 25 of the BB? That first part, "We have found much of heaven..." ? That's what we put on the bottom of our invitations. Anyone in recovery, if they weren't already aware, took that as a sign that they wouldn't have to wrestle the bottle that day.

Congrats, Kelly! Enjoy planning your wedding!! It's a blessed day -- each and every one of them. Please don't let your concerns take any of that away from you.

Peace & Love,
Sugah