Opal

Been reading a few of the posts in here, which I can identify with. I suffer from social anxiety, and drinking helped me with social situations, but after a night of drinking, the anxiety is 2 fold the next day. I started on Campral last week, then stopped it, and hit the bourbon again, so today, I'm starting from scratch again. Got the valium out for later, when I get jittery. I suggested to my husband this morning, that maybe I could just drink at the weekends. In my stupid mind, I think I could handle it, but I know I couldn't. I've always drunk daily. Started with beer, then wine, then switched to bourbon, and sometimes all 3. I'm on Zoloft for the anxiety, and I know it defeats the purpose drinking while taking it. The 4 days I had sober, I felt great. My skin looked better, clearer eyes, and no anxiety. So, those who've stumbled, I wish you all every success. We can only keep trying.

Peter

Hi Opal and welcome to the forums.Thank you for the encouraging words.

I was never diagnosed with "social anxiety" but I do know I was a chronically shy person and drugs and alcohol used to ease the fear of relating to people in a social gathering.

Today I am still a shy person but I dont need alcohol to be able to socialize and have fun.

Learning to accept myself and to not be afraid of other people's opinion of me is a valuable lesson I am learning which is helping me to cope.

AA was very valuable in helping me to put down the glass for the last time and also in making me realize things about myself.

They may be able to help you too.

In the meantime keep checking out the forums and let us know how you are doing.

Peter.

Opal

Hi Peter.
Well, don't know if I'm going to pull this through. Getting restless now. Thinking, maybe, a couple wouldn't hurt. Yes, I've been really shy all my life, and always found it hard to make friends, and nowadays it's even worse. Seems the older you get, the harder things become, maybe, more so for a woman. There's such a strain on women, to keep looking good. I use to do modelling, but forgot about the shyness, when I was out there. Had more confidence, and didn't drink as much back then. Well, thank you for the welcome. Oh, and how long have you been off alcohol? Hooroo for now.

Peter

I had my last drink in November 1997.

I am forty years old and I look and feel better than I ever did than when I was drinking.

I dont miss alcohol and I have absolutely no desire to take a drink.

One thing I learned from twenty years of drinking is it destroyed my physical health, my appearance and self esteem.

Alcoholism is progressive,it gets worse,never better.But it can be arrested.

You are still a beautiful and precious person with much to give,but you have to stop believing all the false promises that alcohol makes.

Peter.

Jenhnidy

Opal,

I have social anxiety as well. I was taking BuSpar and drinking. I was getting so wasted to the point where I was knocking people down on the dance floor.

I don't take the BuSpar anymore but now all the friends that alcohol has allowed me to make, won't let me quit. I want to be a social person but I am just not the same without drinking.

My friends and boyfreind are all mad at me. I feel like I am a boring, lame person that no one wants to be around when I am sober. I am sooo shy.

I know of so many parties that I want to go to and I know I will have to give that whooe lifestyle up. That's the hardest part for me.

Scott L.

Peter is right, the false promises that drugs and alcohol try to decieve us with are, well, cunning, baffling and powerful.

I have severe anxiety attacks, where I panic, or sometimes pass out. Alcohol used to sedate me, but I no longer get the desired affect. Last forth of July, I drank 2 gallons of vodka and could not get drunk and escape, which is the desired affect that I was seeking. I laid in bed afraid to answer the phone, the door, afraid of everything.

I have found that staying away from drugs and alcohol allows the medication to work the way that it is supposed to. When I stopped drinking, my doctor could properly evaluate my meds, and adjust them to work for me, and I take them as prescribed, no narcotics, I have a problem with them too.

And...

Now I am able to face the future and stop running from the past, and can work the steps, living in the momment. I am still not looking forward to the 4th and 5th step, but now I am willing to do them, now that I am sober (6 months on the 10th)

Like Peter, drinking destroyed my health, appearence and self esteem. In a nut shell, it is a life or death situation for me.

progress, not perfection.

Opal

Hi Jenhnidy,
I think social anxiety and all forms of anxiety are much more common than we think. I use to think I was weird, but have since realized I'm not the only one. The Zoloft has helped me. As for the drinking, no, I haven't quit, but for now, I am going to try and cut down. Hubby and I went through a bottle of bourbon last night, but we had such a good time. Played all our 60's music, and danced. I don't go out socializing much these days. I try to avoid it. I just think to myself that noone in this world is perfect. We all have our 'hang ups', and we have to cope the best we can. Maybe, you could still go out with your friends, but not as often. That would be a start. I wish you all the best.

Opal

Hi Peter,
Part of me is so jealous that you've accomplished what I'm trying to do. I know that I have to keep trying. It all seems so hard. I am married to a gambler, which makes it harder for me to get rid of my addiction. I get so stressed out. Feeling really miserable today, but going to keep trying.

Peter

Opal,please do not think from my posts that my life is oh so peachy all the time.

I too still have challenges in life which I must face and overcome and although my battle is not one of the flesh today,it is still a battle of the spirit.

I am here on this forum because I too am still just a sick person who needs to get well and need to hear the message of hope and recovery.

I learn as much from you as you learn from me.Together we can grow and learn.

It is ok to feel a little down today.The important thing is to just not pick up that bottle.The feeling will not last forever......this too shall pass.....

Hang on ok....just hang on......

Peter.

DAO50

Hang in there Opal. What ever issues you have in the world, drinking will eventually only makes them worse. As you said in your first or second post in this thread, you found yourself drinking more now than in the past. Alcohol‘s effect is progressive. If you are having the jitters or cravings, check out caseinpoint’s posts. The supplement program, specifically the B vitamin suggestion worked for me. Also, don’t dismiss AA. I had preconceived notions about AA and I was adverse to going. I found the groups I attended very welcoming, non judgmental, and very supportive. I have heard that not all groups are that way, but if you don’t click with the first group, try another. The combined experience and wisdom of the group members regarding alcohol, its lures and problems, and ways to deal and resolve these issues is truly amazing. Best of luck. Come back to this forum for support often.

Joanna11

Hi Opal.

May I ask you why you decided to stop taking the Campral?

gavin

Hi Opal,

I have social anxiety as well. It's at it's worst the day after a weekend binge. I drink coffee as well and makes it worst. If I could give up coffee for good as well as alcohol I know the anxiety will go away.

btw I'm shy and don't talk much....and I don't write much.

Best of luck. Stick around here there are tons of cool people who can help out.

hotmarriedguy

To all with the social anxiety - I have had this problem for many many years and was one of the causes for me drinking to excess at parties was to become more social. Ask your doc about a low dose of Paxil instead of zoloft. It helps much more than zoloft for me and may well for you.

I will avoid parties for quite a while, but I could see one day that I might enjoy bartending for my friends and watching them get completely stupid. It may be the time in my life where I get to be the fly on the wall and enjoy parties more than ever

hotmarriedguy

P.S. I am also taking campral and so far, so good!!

llenroc66

I suffered from very scary anxiety attacks after binges. I would panic and have trouble focusing my mind, driving, dealing with people, confrontations etc. I went to the emergency room the first time because I thought I was going to pass out (It fed on itself.) Of course I didn't admit to being an alcoholic at that point.

At first I thought I had a mental condition (depression etc.) After some reading, in my case, I'm now sure it is related to physical/chemical imbalances caused from the alcohol binges. Maybe it's even a form of withdrawal.

For me, no binges (drinking) = no attacks.

mrs mipsy

My social drinking, which cons me into believeing that I'm more fun, more talkative and interesting (which I also did last week & ruined my friends birthday celebration) leaves me wondering the next day exactly what I'd done or said to offend people, why I've lost countless belongings on these binges, why my friends are 'off' with me for a while afterwards and why I've put myself in very dangerous situations with strange men and being antagonistic to others in pubs & clubs.....God, it's all worth it because I must be the most 'Confident' person in the world!!! I'm waiting to go into detox. Good luck all.