Made it past the hump...7 months sober!
Wonderful!!Digitally Remastered
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Samsara
Posts: 102
Congratulations Teamfour....7 months! One day at a time and the days seem to happen don't they? I read "Gutter Bravado" last night (4th Edition) and something to the effect of "It's not the journey, it's the destination" was shared... I realized that back during my FIRST time in [before I stayed on a drunk] I'd been so anxious to be *where my sponsor was* that I got wrapped up in not being satisfied where I was.
My last time in....6th day, we had a gratitude meeting. My mind was so busy being genuinely grateful that I was able to do a few loads of laundry that I didn't have time to think of appropriate BS. So I shared, "I am Digits and I am an alcoholic. This is my 6th day of sobriety [people clapped] and I am so grateful that I am able to do my laundry." I meant that with all of my heart, as there was a time I couldn't even keep up with personal hygeine much less laundry.
It goes around the room and some woman said: "I am grateful I am not on day 6." WELL, because I *was* a re-newcomer I immediately got mad...realizing I WAS HAPPY to be on day 6, for if I'd have travelled the original path I was on when I first came in, I KNOW I would not have gotten "honest" as soon as I did. I hated that woman for stealing my genuine achievement...poo-pooing it away. But I worked through it in the meeting and realized she might need my sympathy. But I did share with someone after the meeting that she would be out drunk before the month was up (being the angry little re-newcomer I was and still can be today). I haven't seen her since that meeting.
That was my first experience at being happy at where I was not where (in my mind) I *should* be. Copngratulations on month 7 again T4...it's a wonderful journey for me, hope yours is too!
Love, Digits
My last time in....6th day, we had a gratitude meeting. My mind was so busy being genuinely grateful that I was able to do a few loads of laundry that I didn't have time to think of appropriate BS. So I shared, "I am Digits and I am an alcoholic. This is my 6th day of sobriety [people clapped] and I am so grateful that I am able to do my laundry." I meant that with all of my heart, as there was a time I couldn't even keep up with personal hygeine much less laundry.
It goes around the room and some woman said: "I am grateful I am not on day 6." WELL, because I *was* a re-newcomer I immediately got mad...realizing I WAS HAPPY to be on day 6, for if I'd have travelled the original path I was on when I first came in, I KNOW I would not have gotten "honest" as soon as I did. I hated that woman for stealing my genuine achievement...poo-pooing it away. But I worked through it in the meeting and realized she might need my sympathy. But I did share with someone after the meeting that she would be out drunk before the month was up (being the angry little re-newcomer I was and still can be today). I haven't seen her since that meeting.
That was my first experience at being happy at where I was not where (in my mind) I *should* be. Copngratulations on month 7 again T4...it's a wonderful journey for me, hope yours is too!
Love, Digits
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