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Old 01-06-2012, 05:37 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Getting Sober & Staying That Way Without AA

Is anybody here not in the AA program?

I used to go to them, but I decided not to anymore, because of a personal issue I have within the AA group. Sorry, but it's not for me. I find this online sites much more anonymous.
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Old 01-06-2012, 05:43 PM   #2 (permalink)
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There's a lot of people here who don't use a 12 step method, LeanaJo.

I think the common element to all recovery success stories, regardless of method, is a commitment to the task and a willingness to work hard.

Have you checked out our Secular Connections forum?

Secular Connections - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 01-06-2012, 05:51 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Why don't you resolve the personal issue?
My disease has tried many different excuses to try to get me to quit going to meetings over the years.
I wish you the best in whatever you choose.....

Bob R.
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Old 01-06-2012, 05:55 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Hello Leanaja,

I do not use AA, but so far not successful.
Unfortunately I cannot use AA do to my "position"......Although I work from home, I am also a husband of someone "important". I cannot be seen there unfortunately. It is supposed to be confidential.....but people talk...everyone talks.
I WISH I could go, I feel it would benefit me, but can't.

I have tried the online AA....great people, who do not know who I am nor care. First time in a long time I can relax and share.

I wish you luck.
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Old 01-06-2012, 06:10 PM   #5 (permalink)
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You will find a radically different approach to curing your drinking problem in AVRT, presented in the book "Rational Recovery" by Jack Trimpey. I tried AA repeatedly, in 1994, again in 2001, and again in 2010. While I know many people who have succeeded with AA, I was not one of them. It never fit me, at all. Through RR and AVRT, I finally quit drinking. There is also an AVRT thread in the Secular Connections area on this site. But I would highly recommend the book if you are interested in it.
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Old 01-06-2012, 06:13 PM   #6 (permalink)
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When we decide to sober up, some of us get real touchy
"What if someone sees me coming out of an AA meeting ??!!"

It didn't bother me much that folks saw me puking in the bar parking lot.... heaven help me if they see me coming out of a meeting.
Every one that I know who cares about me is GLAD to see me coming out of the meetings regularly. Just my $0.02
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Old 01-06-2012, 06:24 PM   #7 (permalink)
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As Dee said, many of us have managed to stay sober and live rewarding lives without the 12-steps. I have nothing against AA or any other program that works for someone. People tend to recommend what works for them, which is fine. We're all individuals and what works for one might not work for another. Find what works for you and then do that. We're here to support you whichever route you take.
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Old 01-06-2012, 06:27 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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I have used and still use some of AA literature (the parts that make sense and work for me), but it's only a very small fraction of what I use. There were times that the fellowship was not helpful for me, rather the opposite. I have not had a drink in five years and because I am done with the booze I've been able to learn and grow in ways I never imagined possible. There are many, many ways to quit drinking. As Dee said, check out the secular connections.
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Old 01-06-2012, 06:55 PM   #9 (permalink)
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8 Months and some change sober, and I havent stepped foot in an AA meeting since I got sober. I was a real bad drinker as well, but I just didnt find the need to go.

I grew up in AA to tell you the truth. My mom was a recovering addict most of my younger life. I cant count how many meeting I sat in on, or the big AA camp out get togethers I've been too. I know all about the program simply because I grew up around it. But for me? Naaa. I had a head full of AA before I even took my first drink. It boggles me sometimes how I ended up an alcoholic with all the knowledge in my head. But it is what it is...

-Ryan
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Old 01-06-2012, 07:02 PM   #10 (permalink)
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You can quit without AA

I have to admit AA is one of the reasons I will be sober for 1 year and 6 months on the 10th of this month. I have a friend who hads been sober for 30 years and has never been to an AA meeting in his life. I know man who has been sober 10 years, never been to an AA meeting in his life. AA, no AA, the first thing you have to do is say no ever time you get the urge to drink.
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Old 01-06-2012, 07:09 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I am 6 months clean and sober (almsot) and have done it with GOD! I attend a meeting 2 or 3 times a month, to visit friends I love AA but really for me, I go to the source and for me that is GOD. I experienced my first real urge to use today, it was there in front of me and I really wanted to use. I got on my kness and prayed
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Old 01-06-2012, 09:20 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I'm another not using AA. I will never say a word against it, it seems to do a lot of good, but for me it's not possible. And even if it were possible, I don't think it's "my thing", to be honest.
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Old 01-07-2012, 01:36 PM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm another non-AA person, although I was in the program for several years after I quit drinking in 1998.

I saw it help a number of people, but I didn't find it to be a good fit for me.

The thing that helped me most was an absolute commitment to quit drinking no matter what--and a very good therapist.
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Old 01-07-2012, 01:39 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters View Post
Why don't you resolve the personal issue?
My disease has tried many different excuses to try to get me to quit going to meetings over the years.
I wish you the best in whatever you choose.....

Bob R.
I don't believe that using a non-AA approach to recovery means that someone's disease is making excuses, Bob.

AA is NOT the only way to recover.
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Old 01-07-2012, 01:58 PM   #15 (permalink)
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I like being old-schooled because it has worked
for me for the past 21 yrs. IT has worked because
I worked IT. AA Recovery Program consisting of
steps and principles incorperated in my everyday
life with openmindedness, willingness and honesty.

Humbled & Grateful.

Now that's what Im talking about..!
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Old 01-07-2012, 02:27 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I don't get it. I couldn't stop drinking. I go to meetings, I take steps, I don't drink anymore. I haven't had a drink in some time.

This is because of AA.

How can I begin a different program of recovery and say that program works unless I start drinking again ?
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Old 01-07-2012, 02:44 PM   #17 (permalink)
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If this was addressed to me, I never stated that I stopped drinking in the first place because of AA.

I am sober today because I want to be.
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Old 01-07-2012, 02:51 PM   #18 (permalink)
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OTT, it wasn't addressed to you, it was a question to anyone who might answer, and the question was inspired more by the OP than your post.
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Old 01-07-2012, 03:00 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheJungianThing View Post
How can I begin a different program of recovery and say that program works unless I start drinking again ?
I certainly wouldn't recommend that, TJJ.

If what you are doing is working, why fix it? The problem arises when what you are doing isn't working, not when it is.
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Old 01-07-2012, 03:11 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Hi LeanaJo! I am not an AA participant. If I didn't have another means of support, I might consider it, but I lean on my closest friends and visit this site everyday. I also plan on purchasing literature about alcoholism as a way to enlighten myself as well. So I guess as it stands, I do have my own plan, but no matter what, drinking just isn't an option... at all...if I take a drink I may lose everyone important in my life. Just thinking of that by itself scares me to death and I don't want any part of it.
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