sweetnovember

I drank from the moment I came home at night until I was tired enough to go to bed. Everyday for at least 7 years. I was wanting to stop this insanity but couldn't. I was sick of it. I decided that night to make that my last drink. Now its 52 days and holding.

1963comet

I pretty much did the drinking like you did. After 8 years I had to stop. I felt I was slowly killing myself.

Boy, it does make you like dancing when you stop. great news

2Magoo

I used up the last of my marijuana today. I tossed two large buds in the toilet and smoked the remainder, a bowl's worth. I'm really scared. When I did it and signed up on this site, my heart was pounding.

I know I need to do this. My smoking is an escape that I have to replace with something healthy.

One of the most difficult parts is that my husband smokes and I don't want to ask him to quit. I've been thinking about accommodations he can make to help me get a strong start.

sweetnovember

Magoo-I am so understanding your pain. The best way to deal is to get though each hour you would have used and be proud you didn't. Go to AA its for all kinds of substance abuse. You will be accepted and it will give you more weapons in this war you are fighting. You will win. You will also find a new way to deal with lifes anxiety that is better than any buzz that drug gave you but it takes guts and determination. You have to want it!!! You can do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sweetnovember

Definitely ask him to do his smoking out of your presence but if he doesn't go with that you have to take the attitude that his actions are not going to push you off your path because you already made a choice and you don't need his approval or support eventhough of course it would be nice to have it.

Coquette

Ditto. And still doing it. I'm too afraid to sleep without the aids of meds - whether it's liquor or pills. I hate it. Last night/morning, I was awake at 3am drinking so I could take an Ambien and go back to bed. God, it sucks.

The sad thing is I have come to detest liquor and the hold it has over me. It's moved from addiction (and fun) to a necessity. I'm too afraid to try to sleep without it; the last time I did I was awake for days. I just hope that soon I can kick the habit...

ex D-Boy

Coquette --

I know exactly what you are going through now. For me the hardest part of the withdrawals was the terrible insomnia, being zombified the next day with only 1-2 hours of sleep the night before AT BEST. I am now 3 and a half weeks clean and sleep is SO Much better. I get a good 6-7 hours each night and only will take me 20-30 minutes to fall asleep.

You have the strength to get through that first week of no sleep, just rent a bunch of movies and keep visiting these forums late at night. that helped me a lot my first week.

Be safe and good luck,
Scott