Acheleus

So I have a question for people in recovery.

Did anyone get to a point in sobriety where you could see yourself and your surroundings with clarity and insight? I see so many things I need to improve in my life that I would have ignored if I was drinking. I know that going to meetings helps me self-reflect and accept my own selfishness.

I also was with a nice woman for years but I was drunk and abusive. My aa relationship was insane. I was so lonely I thought I loved the first person who gave me any attention. I was weak, lonely, and sad.

So how did you begin improving your self and life after quitting drinking? I had nine months and drank one night. Now I am seven months and I feel like I can see so many things this relationship has distracted me from.

For example I never dated i just settled for the first woman who paid attention to me. I ended up short selling myself. Today I plan on getting my self esteem back by maintaining no contact with my abusive ex.

soberclover

"So how did you begin improving your self and life after quitting drinking?"

There is no coincidence that I came upon this at this moment. I was just thinking how cracked I still am in certain parts of my life. There are other parts of my life that are good and honest and true....those are the bigger parts of my life....but there is still this "crack" in my inner self.

How do I go about improving my self? For me the first part is at least recognizing that I'm cracked and that certain behaviors are just not recovery-person behaviors. Not so sure I'm ready to let go of the behavior...in my case "the relationship". Sounds like you are recognizing some parts of yourself too that you have been short selling yourself on.

I've started to think about writing again. I have to get a journal. I should probably take some initiative and start doing it rather then just thinking about it

DrakeCKC

Holy Prokofiev?? never heard that one before.

Journaling helped me. I could put things in perspective and have a record of my thoughts.. helped sort things out.

Acheleus

I used to journal. I started dating an alcoholic and all my interests fell out of my hands. Now I am trying to pick them up again. I was never in an abusive relationship before. Giving up the relationship is like giving up drinking.