Life or death
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 425
Life or death
I have had many challenges in my life as we all have. I had a relapse after staying clean for 10 months, and am back to the meetings and literature that is so important in all our recoveries.
I have been clean again for almost 30 days, and a couple weeks ago I was having a hard day, as I have been in a wheelchair since July because of an accident. (puts new meaning to one day at a time for me).
My daughter knew I was having a hard day, and she said something to me that I will never forget. When she was a teenager she was a cutter and was suicidal, and I fought to help her keep her life on a regular basis.
She said to me, "mom, do you not remember when I tried to hang myself and you would always tell me, honey, lets talk tomorrow and the next day etc. ,your feelings could be so different then. What difference is one more day?"
We both learned the value of "one more day". She reminds me that I wouldn't let her kill herself, so why should she let me. Now when I feel I can't wait another day to use, she uses my lines on me. MAJOR impact believe me. When I think about it, it all comes down to life or death.
I am so proud of her now, she managed to get the help she needed, finished college, and is 22 years old now. You never know what waiting another day can do for you. I never expected that she would be helping me as an adult some day, out of love and concern the way I did for her. I am grateful to so much and for so many people in my life today.
Thanks for reading
I have been clean again for almost 30 days, and a couple weeks ago I was having a hard day, as I have been in a wheelchair since July because of an accident. (puts new meaning to one day at a time for me).
My daughter knew I was having a hard day, and she said something to me that I will never forget. When she was a teenager she was a cutter and was suicidal, and I fought to help her keep her life on a regular basis.
She said to me, "mom, do you not remember when I tried to hang myself and you would always tell me, honey, lets talk tomorrow and the next day etc. ,your feelings could be so different then. What difference is one more day?"
We both learned the value of "one more day". She reminds me that I wouldn't let her kill herself, so why should she let me. Now when I feel I can't wait another day to use, she uses my lines on me. MAJOR impact believe me. When I think about it, it all comes down to life or death.
I am so proud of her now, she managed to get the help she needed, finished college, and is 22 years old now. You never know what waiting another day can do for you. I never expected that she would be helping me as an adult some day, out of love and concern the way I did for her. I am grateful to so much and for so many people in my life today.
Thanks for reading
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