KelKel

It Is The Toughest Fight I have Ever Fought.

roadie58

Weekends are the toughest. Best to plan some activity, even just to stay busy, to avoid trouble. I always get particularly shaky around the holidays (witness my July 4 debacle), when extra days 'off' turn into days OFF!

Try to hang with non-using friends if you can, whatever you do, don't isolate, seems to be a big problem for me.

Thanks for your support on my thread Liam! Hang in there!

Liam

Roadie:

Glad to see that things are a little better at least. You are right--we have to learn to cope and deal with the things that we can. The biggest being where, and how we spend our time. It's so easy to fall into bad habits and too fight against what used to be pleasureable and a release-- but in the end it's worth it.

Hope you had a good weekend. Will see you later.

Liam

angelgirl

Hi there Liam,,, been a little while since I posted here on you post
I was reading through some, looks like overall you are doing REALLY good eh?
That's great!! Hard work, but well worth it.. I know for me it is, although I do have to remind myself to be grateful, well often I do, it's easy sometimes to become ungratful for life.. even a better life. So I continue to work on that. I need to be thanking god all the time for what I do have.
Well, just wanted to say hi, glad you are still around here... Glad your still clean & sober, in recovery Good place to be!!!!
Have a great day
Sending love and well wishes,, Becky

Liam

I just got back from a wedding and had a great time without any bad behaviour. 37 days cleans so far.

Liam

roadie58

Hey Liam, just don't 'graduate' this time. It is a tough battle. Hang in there and stick around here. There's healing at work.

KelKel

37 Days!

Liam

Well I'm at a good/bad stage. Over a month-- this is generally when things begin to fall apart. In the past I've relaxed-- felt like I was over it and in some way went back to the same old stuff. I will never "graduate"-- and in my heart I always will know that in just a few seconds I could slide back. Thanks guys for your help so far.

Liam

roadie58

I, too seem to have problems around the birthday's. For this reason I have stopped taking tokens until I get the NEXT one, my six month. Continually relapsing right after 60 or 90 days, I had to go against the program of celebrating birthdays for the 'newcomer'. It won't do any of them any good if I relapse and die. So I'm being selfish, sue me.

Keep strong Liam, Just ONE DAY AT A TIME. Keep a birthday if you want, but forget about the anniversarys. Be good to yourself.

Liam

Another good day upon us I hope. It's amazing the things you begin to learn as the fog gets a bit clearer. I'm starting to think that I've learned something about myself and my addiction. My biggest fear was that I wasn't learning ANYTHING. It seemed that no matter what I did-- things were hopeless. I would go back. That's not exactly the truth now. I think my vigilance is getting stronger-- but alas always on the look out-- I've been confident before and got burned.

Liam

hopealwayz

Liam,

Good to see you finding your way. Just keep doing it one day at a time. Stay in the moment and don't look ahead.

It is great when hope is found in the darkness. That is a moment of true blessing.

Take care!

MADDISON

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOUR GOING THROUGH I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM SOMETIMES I FEEL AS IF IM ALWAYS GOING TO BE AN ADDICT AN ACTIVE ADDICT THAT IS BUT I KNOW SOMEWHERE OUT THERE AND WITHIN MYSELF I CAN BEAT THIS I HAVE REALIZED THAT I WILL NEVER BE NORMAL I DONT KNOW WHAT NORMAL IS I WAKE UP EVERY DAY AND PRAY TO GOD THAT I DONT FALL FLAT ON MY FACE. SOMEHOW I GET THROUGH IT. I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO YOU REGULARLY IT SEEMS WE COULD HELP EACH OTHER


YOU CAN EMAIL ME IF YOU LIKE [email protected]


KEEP YOUR HEAD UP

angelgirl

Hey Liam, it's been a while since I last posted to you... How are you doing???
Please post and let us know how your doing Well, I hope...

Love,Becky

Liam

Thanks Guys.... I appreciate all the good thoughts. Somedays are better than others. Like with Roadie...I find weekends pretty tough-- but things are a lot better. I get scared sometimes-- mostly because I'm NOT scared all the time...and maybe I should be. My life has changed a lot over the last year and so has my lifestyle. Things are much better than they used to be and getting better-- leaving me scared about a fall. But, that's not all bad. In previous attempts I always denied my problem which led me to guess what. Living a little scared is better than using any day. For that I'm grateful.

Liam

Liam

Sorry that I've been away for a week or so. I was away camping and things are still good. 55 days clean and feeling better. Eating better, sleeping better, reading better, being better.

roadie58

Good to hear you're doing okay Liam. I too went camping. Talk about getting closer to a HP! I too got a case of the 'betters' after a long awaited vacation.

Liam

A tough day today, but I made it through. It's so easy to get distracted ESPECIALLY when you've been doing well. My challenge is not to do well but to do better.

Liam

I've been away for a while but have stayed clean for over three months now. It's funny how busy you get when you feel good in the morning. I want to thank everyone for thier concern especially Angelgirl and Roadie. You guys are good online friends. I'll be making more frequent and substantive posts over the next while.

Thanks,

Liam

roadie58

There he is! Good, now we have our little circle back. Good to hear you stayed clean and sober Liam. Been doing meetings or ?? How'd you do it?

Liam

I've been clean for 100 days and it's do in no small part to those who have helped me through these forums. It is possible to stay clean and it helps in all ways. To those who are looking for hope-- keep coming back!!!