Timebuster

Phases of Relapse.

Many people new in recovery and some that have been around for awhile may believe that relapse is an event. In other words, they believe that one they JUST all of a sudden they used drugs or drank alcohol after having some period of abstinence. The fact is that relapse is a process. This means that before a person returns to drug or alcohol use there are warning signs. This warning signs show up in ones behavior, attitude, thinking, or feelings and can show up in all four at once.

Therefore, it is important to incorporate in your recovery a way of monitoring your relapse warning signs so that you can prevent yourself from progressing through the phases and ultimately returning to your addiction. Most useful is to take a daily inventory or doing a nightly check off of the relapse warning signs and then incorporate a strategy to work your way out of the phase that you may be in. It is important to know that it is possible to go from one phase to the last phase, where using and drinking has begun, in a short period of time.

PHASE 1(internal change) During this phase you look good on the outside.
1.Increased stress
2.Change in thinking: you begin to feel that your recovery program is not as important as it used to be. Begin to feel that you don't need to put forth as much effort now that things seem ok, or the program doesn't seem to help so you say "why bother."
3.Change in feeling: start having unpleasant feelings that you don't like, like things are going your way when you know they aren't. feeling
depressed, like nothing is working out.
4.Change in Behavior

PHASE 2 (Denial)You stop telling other what you honestly are feeling or thinking.
5. Worrying about yourself: you feel uneasy about the changes in your thinking, feelings and behavior. you feel afraid that you won't be able to reamin sober but don't want to think or talk about it.
6. Denying that you're worried

PHASE 3 (Avoidance and Defensiveness)You avoid anyone or anything that will force you to be honest about you.
7. Believing I'll never use alcohol or drug : over confidence
8. Worrying about others instead of yourself
9. Defensiveness
10. Compulsive Behavior
11. Impulsive Behavior
12. Tendencies toward loneliness: start feeling uncomfortable around others and start spending more time alone.

PHASE 4 (Crisis Building)You start having problem in sobriety.
12. Tunnel Vision
13. Minor Depression
14. Loss of Constructive Planning
15. Plans begin to fail: Tend to overreact and mismanage each problem in a way that creates a bigger problem.

PHASE 5 (Immobilization)You begin to feel trapped or can't get started doing what you know you need to do.
16. Daydreaming and wishful thinking
17. Feeling that nothing can be solved
18. Immature wish to be happy: have a vague desire to be happy or have things work out but don't set up any plans to make those things happen. Wishing magically that something will happen to rescue you from your problems.

PHASE 6 (Confusion and Overreaction)You have trouble thinking clearly, irritable and tend to overreact.
19. Difficulty in thinking clearly
20. Difficulty in managing feelings and emotions
21. Difficulty in Remembering things
22. Periods of confusion
23. Difficulty in managing stress
24. Irritation with friends
25. Easily angered

PHASE 7 (Depression)You stop doing the things you usaully do. You think life is not worth living.
26. Irregular Eating habits
27. Lack of desire to take action
28. Difficulty sleeping restfully
29. Loss of daily structure
30. Periods of Deep depression

PHASE 8 (Behavior loss of control)You are out of control but not willing to admit it.
31. Irregular attendance at NA/AA or treatment meetings
32. An I don't care attitude
33. Open rejection of help
34. Dissatisfaction with life
35. Feeling of powerlessness and helpless

PHASE 9 (Recognition of loss of Control)You realize how severe your problems are, but have become so isolated that you feel there is no one to turn to.
36. Difficulty with physical coordination and accidents
37. Self-pity
39. Thoughts of social use
40. Conscious lying
41. Complete loss of self confidence

PHASE 10 (Option reduction)You feel no one can help you and that there is only three options; insanity, suicide or self-medication with alcohol and drugs.
42. Unreasonable resentments
43. Discontinue all treatment
44. Overwhelming Loneliness, Frustration, anger, and tension.
45. Loss of behavioral control

PHASE 11 (alcohol and drug use)You return to alcohol and drugs, try to control it but once again you realize your addiction is destroying your life.
46. Attempting control use
47. Disappointment, shame, guilt
48. Loss of control: problem use begins
49. Life and health problem

"A day in which an addict or alcoholic does not use or drink is a good day. A day in which an addict or alcoholic does not use or drink when their head tell them to, is a GREAT day."

Ivan

lostbutterfly

Yikes, I seem to be in all the phases all the time, no wonder I'm always relapsing. I did spot something yesterday in myself tho.

I was thinking I was sick of all this recovery stuff, reading literature, going online, trying to live step 3. So I'm deliberately increasing my reading, going to meetings etc. and trying to turn my will over etc.

I have to remember never to forget what I am.

Nallabelle

Thank you for posting this. I know for me (at least I think) I relapsed because My brain was still thinking the way it always had. When I "quit" using the first time, I changed nothing about my ways of thinking or behavior. Makes it really hard to stay sober.

Stagebear

I'd like to use this, if it is not yours can you PM me the source so I can credit it appropriately? Thanks, Ivan!

Timebuster

For you Nallabelle.

THE SERENITY PRAYER EXPLAINED...

GOD

SAYING THIS WORD I AM ADMITTING THE EXISTENCE OF A CONSCIOUSNESS OR? OF? A HIGHER POWER THAT IS GREATER THAN I.

GRANT

SAYING THIS SECOND WORD, I AM ADMITTING THAT THIS CONSCIOUSNESS OR HIGHER POWER IS ABLE TO BESTOW AND GIVE TO ME AND TO OTHERS.

ME THE

I AM ASKING SOMETHING FOR MYSELF. HOLY BOOKS SAY THAT IF I ASK SINCERELY, IT SHALL BE GIVEN. IT IS NOT WRONG TO ASK FOR IMPROVING MYSELF. FOR WITH THE IMPROVEMENT OF MY CHARACTER, BOTH I AND PEOPLE AROUND ME WILL BE HAPPIER, AND MY RELATIONSHIPS WILL HAVE A BETTER CHANCE TO IMPROVE.

SERENITY

I AM ASKING FOR CALMNESS, COMPOSURE AND INNER PEACE IN MY LIFE WHICH WILL ENABLE ME TO TRANSCEND MY EGO, TO THINK STRAIGHT AND TO GOVERN MYSELF PROPERLY.

TO ACCEPT

I AM RESIGNING MYSELF TO CONDITIONS AS THEY ARE RIGHT NOW. I AM LIVING IN THE NOW, THE PRESENT MOMENT.

THE THINGS

I ACKNOWLEDGE MY TRAGEDY, DEATH, SUFFERING, ILLNESS AND PAIN, AS A PART OF MY LIFE, NEITHER GOOD NOR BAD. I ACCEPT MY HUMANNESS AND FALLIBILITY. I AM ACCEPTING MY LOT IN LIFE AS IT IS. UNTIL I HAVE THE COURAGE TO CHANGE ANY PART OF MY LIFE I DON'T LIKE, I MUST ACCEPT IT, WITHOUT DOING SO GRUDGINGLY.

I CANNOT CHANGE

I CAN'T PREVENT THESE EVENTS OR CONDITIONS FROM HAPPENING TO ME OR TO OTHERS.

COURAGE

A QUALITY WHICH ENABLES ME TO DEAL WITH THE PROBLEMS AND REALITIES OF LIFE WITHOUT RELIANCE ON ALCOHOL OR DRUGS. A DETERMINATION TO STAND MY GROUND AND "SLUG IT OUT" WITH ALL ISSUES, PLEASANT OR OTHERWISE, THAT MIGHT RETURN ME TO DRINKING OR USING. A STRENGTH OF MY SPIRIT TO FACE AND HANDLE THE NEGATIVE. FEARLESSNESS IN THE PRACTICE OF FAITH, HUMILITY AND HONESTY.

TO CHANGE

IN FACING THESE NEGATIVES DIRECTLY AND HONESTLY, I AM ASKING FOR MYSELF AND MY LIFE CONDITIONS TO BE DIFFERENT FOR ME. I AM TAKING AN ACTIVE PART IN THIS CHANGING.

THE THINGS I CAN

I AM ASKING FOR HELP TO MAKE THE RIGHT DECISIONS. EVERYTHING IS NOT THE WAY I WOULD LIKE IT TO BE IN MY LIFE. I MUST CONTINUE TO FACE REALITY AND CONSTANTLY WORK TOWARD MY CONTINUED GROWTH AND PROGRESS.

AND WISDOM

I AM ASKING FOR THE ABILITY TO RISE ABOVE MY EGO AND FORM SOUND JUDGMENTS ABOUT MYSELF AND MY LIFE. I THEN USE MY ABILITY TO ASK FOR GUIDANCE FROM MYSELF, OTHERS AND A HIGHER POWER.

TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE

I WANT TO BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND CLEARLY TRUTHS OF FACT. I WANT TO SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY IN MY LIFE SO THAT I WILL BE MORE AWARE OF MYSELF AND OF OTHERS. I NEED TO SENSE A DEFINITE VALUE IN LOVING OVER BEING SELFISH.

Timebuster

Bear, you can use Anonymous.

Timebuster

Also Bear, Here’s another little jewel about resentments.

R E S E N T S O M E B O D Y

The moment you start to resent a person you become their slave.
They control your dreams, absorb your digestion,
rob you of peace of mind and good will,
and take away the pleasure of your work.
They ruin your spirituality and nullify your prayers.

You cannot take a vacation without them going along!
They destroy your freedom of mind and hound you wherever you go.
There is no way to escape the person you resent.
They are with you when you are awake.
They invade your privacy when you sleep.
They are close beside you when you eat,
when you drive your car, and when you are on the job.

You can never have efficiency or happiness.
They influence even the tone of your voice.
They require you to take medicine for indigestion,
headaches and loss of energy.
They even steal your last moment of consciousness
before you go to sleep.

So if you want to be a slave, harbor your resentments.

The problem is, no matter whom we're resenting, the anger is ultimately directed against ourselves. Having a resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

Anonymous.

windysan

too many words

cjsg

Well, another post that seemed to drop out of the clear blue, just as I have passed through a few rough few days. I can definately see a few of the things from the first few phases brewing in my attitudes. Thanks for posting

miamifella

This may not be what you intended, but I think it explains why my cravings get intense at meetings and I often relapse after. The need to put a positive spin on my experience and not being able to be open about cravings make me go through a lot of these stages in one night.

I can handle feeling the isolation and lonliness of meetings when I am more firmly sober. But when the cravings hit, it can be disastrous.