Roxxi

Hi

I just wanted to make a short post to say Hi. I was refered here along time ago by
Done-With-It. I am addicted to Ice (crystal). I am not even sure if I should be
here or not because I don't know if I can ever stop this ******* drug. But I've ready almost all 400 thousand of her posts and see how she and some others have stopped it. She probalbly doensnt even remembrer me, but she told me how she wasnt realy ready to stop either or she didnt think she could stop but she tried anyway and she did.
I'm going to die if I don't. I just don't know how I can, yes ive been to meetings and i know when i'm ready i'll do what it takes. i just dont know. my last sponsor relapsed and is my 'dealer'. It's everywhere i go, the dealers are everywhere, so i dont even get how someone stops once they stop. anywya, i'm gonna try again. or die one of the other.
Thanks done-with-it, you spent a lot of time with me more than once if you remember, but roxxi isnt' my name so you might not remmeeber.

northbelle

Hi Roxxi....yeah thats a rough one girl..But you CAN stop....it IS possible...I have seen people do some amazing things to save their own lives..and that is exactly what we are talkin about right?? This isn't just partyin on the weekends...its about survivial...I ONLY speak this because I KNOW..
Just a few months ago I was right there...facing my demon..heroin..and I had to make a choice. Get clean or die...ya know and only a ADDICT LIKE ME...would actually have to sit and THINK about that choice ya know..
Uh..do I wanna keep puttin dope in my veins and die?....or should I get clean and have a great life????......Geeee I dunno , let me keep going for awhile here !!!
Sound familiar...we are a special breed of folks us addict alki..whatever your addicted to..some things just kill you quicker than others...Heroin Ice....they will work their evil pretty fast and you will be gone beyond regonition in no time!! I was..I became the worst things I ever thought about when I thought of addiction...it was awful!!
Roxxi..you can do it..are you ready to make a first step?? Do YOU BELIEVE THAT YOU HAVE ANY CONTROL OVER YOUR ADDICTION RIGHT NOW???? It does not sound like it...
Sounds like you just MIGHT BE READY..
I mean comeon..how much readier can ya get! IT sounds pretty ugly...Ice is freaky **** and people get so spun on it..No world for man nor beast to live in!!

So I DUNNO...ya think ya just might be ready????
love north

northbelle

Save yourself Roxxi...
lotsa love to ya sis!!!!
north

Peter

Welcome to the forums Roxxi and you are not a lost cause.

Ms. Done and many other addicts have been able to use this forum to positively deal with their drug problem. It might be able to help you too.

Keep reading and posting.

Anna

Hi Roxxi,

Welcome!

There is always hope, always!

And, you are definitely not a lost cause. The fact that you're here, reading Miss Done's posts and seeking help shows that you can do this.

DesertEyes

Hey there Roxxi, and welcome to Sober Recovery.

You are _not_ a lost cause. Nobody is. Not ever. There's tons and tons of people who have stopped, and many of them in much deeper than you. All you gotta do is stop for _one_ day at a time. Just for today. You can do one day, and we are all here to help you thru.

Mike

Done_With_It

Wow~Girl you made it! I'm so proud of you! lol, Yea I remember who you are, kind of hard to forget who you are. I knew you would make it here sooner or later, lol, and I knew you wouldn't forget the name of the website, ha ha. Is it still there.
There aren't dealers everywhere in LA/Hollywood unless you put yourself around them, and when you find yourself around one then you leave. But when you go around offering people lines like you do, you aren't doing much better than they are, if you remember how we met.
You were sober for awhile, and I told you all of this already I'm sorry that your dealer relapsed and gave you meth, but you can't change the past, it's time to move on now. It's not her fault you relapsed, did you see me take your offer of a line?
I could have relapsed and blamed it on you. We have choices in what we do.
You made the choice to relapse, now you can make the choice to get sober again.
Either find a new meeting, go to rehab, go to the Hollywood Center, go to detox,
do whatever you have to do, or yes you may die.
You CAN DO IT. You were so ready to do this a few months ago both times when I saw you. So I know you want to quit, and yes you should be here. Come on girl, don't let the drugs win. If you want to quit you have to quit or change your lifestyle, change your friends, until you are strong enough to go out at night, in the clubs, etc. you probably aren't going to be able to go, I don't want to tell you what to do, but if you really want to quit. I quit doing everything for a long time when I stopped, there was no way I could say no or even be in a party, upbeat atmosphere, figure out what you need to do. Make a plan for yourself. I spent many nights at home in front of my computer here at SR instead because that's the only safe place I had.
You can do it!!:ghug Throw what you have out right now!~ Can you start by doing that? You did it before.. Congrats again on making it here!

DWI~

greeteachday

Hey Roxxi! I'm a firm believer that there are no lost causes....I KNOW you can do it...just remember just for today you can choose to be clean. As Done said, stay away from all those folks who can pull you back in...hang here, use the wonderful support network and keep moving forward one step at a time. Hugs...I believe in you!!!

ccgirl

Roxxi, you're here and that's a start. Welcome.

Roxxi

wow so many posts. u all make me want to cry.

done it is still on my car thats the only way i remembered this place.

thank you to everyone else who posted to me, i'm in tears right now and \i cant even think what to type. i'm so screwed right now, i never thought i would be here.
my life is always so organized and planned and perfect and now nothing is okay.
im lost.

Done_With_It

File for unemployment now. Sit down and make a plan. Now would be a good time
to go into rehab/detox. Don't you think? Your life isn't as organized and as planned and as perfect as you think it is or you wouldn't have turned to meth in the first place, that's what we all think, then the meth just makes us think it is for a long time. You can get yourself out of this it's not to late. Do it now before you really
do lose everything. It is stressful here right now, lol, go into rehab now, and get away from this place for awhile, lol, it's probably better in there, , it's just going to get worse here tomorrow. Hang in there girl,
:support Fight tough!
Your going to be okay.