****** up again
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Originally Posted by Hopeful528 
When I start to feel better, when time has passed, and the acute memory is no longer as strong, what can I do and change so that I end this cycle?
Continuing to post here - posting to others, re reading my old threads - all helped me break that 'I don't have a problem cycle
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 10
Hey. I totally get where you are coming from today. I screwed up. I haven’t drank but I got sober after coming out of a relationship 4 months ago. I changed my whole life. Diet, sleep, exercise, meditation. Discipline and routine. I want just going to white knuckle it. I was going to live a useful life and a life I wanted to live..... things were great. I was my old self. A girl asked me out..... I said yes. I got caught up in it. Tonight she said something that had me feeling like I’d been pushed off a cliff. Just a sense of falling. I’m not going to drink. I actually don’t feel like drinking. I just feel as low as I did the day before I stopped drinking. Not in control of my emotions. Lack of discipline. I had not prepared myself for this, and I guess not ready to deal with it. Wow. All I can say to myself is this too shall pass. Emotions are not actions. Actions are what I judge myself by. I will learn a lesson from this. I will not numb this emotion with alcohol. I will deal with it and move on.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 617
Sorry for the delay.
Thank you for responding to me and sharing how you feel.
Emotions can be really challenging to me but Im determined this is my last lesson. Because it is never the solution.
Congratulations to you for realizing how ****** reaching for alcohol would be! and what a ****** worst choice possible!
Even though the emotions are strong in the moment and can make you temporary thinking stinking it does not make anything better! Im Fridays Proof.
It Makes EVERYTHING 10000000000 times worse and is never worth it. You will feel better and learn a great deal from this and not have to start over like me.
I will describe a brief shot of how I how I feel right now:
I would normally ride my bike, go for a walk, or be outside, and I joined the world again yesterday evening but currently feel like my head is discombobulated and like I am crawling out of my own skin, and feeling absolute remorse and ways of actual physical panic and my strength to accomplish what i normally would enjoy doing is so overwhelming.
On the outside, no one could tell but I now have to deal with my life that is still here waiting for me, while I climb the days again to feel like a human being and great again.
I feel completely overwhelmed and have been doing homework all day and it feels like my head is under water, completely foggy and I'll probably be up until 2 am doing it and hopefully I'm doing it right.
I have consequences at school from drinking Friday that i will be facing this week and in one night I have ruined many things again and set myself back. And, I have lost sober time as well as I have a week full of obligations and exams and interviews and I want to crawl under a rock.
Lol sorry, I don't know if that is any help and I'm sorry to that you have to deal with this at 4 months as they say it is really hard in the first year. With your tools and discipline, you're going to make it,
But I thought I could explain a little of how I feel because I'm in it right now and next time I feel like that im running to a meeting or I'm doing any healthy tool and never doing this to myself. Because it and nothing and nobody is ever worth it. And remember we cant change people places or things. We have no control over them. We only have control over ourselves.
Think of how healthy you are and what a great choice! Congratulations. I'm now going to go to a meeting even though I don't want too.
Thanks for the reply
Thank you for responding to me and sharing how you feel.
Emotions can be really challenging to me but Im determined this is my last lesson. Because it is never the solution.
Congratulations to you for realizing how ****** reaching for alcohol would be! and what a ****** worst choice possible!
Even though the emotions are strong in the moment and can make you temporary thinking stinking it does not make anything better! Im Fridays Proof.
It Makes EVERYTHING 10000000000 times worse and is never worth it. You will feel better and learn a great deal from this and not have to start over like me.
I will describe a brief shot of how I how I feel right now:
I would normally ride my bike, go for a walk, or be outside, and I joined the world again yesterday evening but currently feel like my head is discombobulated and like I am crawling out of my own skin, and feeling absolute remorse and ways of actual physical panic and my strength to accomplish what i normally would enjoy doing is so overwhelming.
On the outside, no one could tell but I now have to deal with my life that is still here waiting for me, while I climb the days again to feel like a human being and great again.
I feel completely overwhelmed and have been doing homework all day and it feels like my head is under water, completely foggy and I'll probably be up until 2 am doing it and hopefully I'm doing it right.
I have consequences at school from drinking Friday that i will be facing this week and in one night I have ruined many things again and set myself back. And, I have lost sober time as well as I have a week full of obligations and exams and interviews and I want to crawl under a rock.
Lol sorry, I don't know if that is any help and I'm sorry to that you have to deal with this at 4 months as they say it is really hard in the first year. With your tools and discipline, you're going to make it,
But I thought I could explain a little of how I feel because I'm in it right now and next time I feel like that im running to a meeting or I'm doing any healthy tool and never doing this to myself. Because it and nothing and nobody is ever worth it. And remember we cant change people places or things. We have no control over them. We only have control over ourselves.
Think of how healthy you are and what a great choice! Congratulations. I'm now going to go to a meeting even though I don't want too.
Thanks for the reply
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 617
I feel emotionally and physically exhausted today and my energy is really low.
I also have a sense of calm that this time is the time I make it, and that I’m never looking back.
I will not drink today. I’m an alcoholic and I will never forget that again.
I also have a sense of calm that this time is the time I make it, and that I’m never looking back.
I will not drink today. I’m an alcoholic and I will never forget that again.
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