CosmicCharlie

And i must say it truly doesn't seem worth it to me I am in the same place I was same depression <only now I feel it> same attitude and such . I am not gonna relapse cause as I have said allot here, to confirm to myself mainly, I have way to much goin gon right now to be all clouded and go back down that road .. But it is so easy to think One beer won't hurt me :p Again just posting to let my feelings out to others I know are thinkin the same thing as me .. It is comforting knowing that but alas it is also scary to think that all these people and I still can't find that right groove .. Reading the post I start to answer some encourgment and I end up not answering cause I think WTFunk am I to say anything I am in such a rocky place myself ...

HPierce

sometimes just letting someone else know that you relate to them or you understand what they are going through sometimes is all the help you can give. anything you do for someone is helping them in your own way. we all go through the rocky parts of getting sober... just remember the longer you go the better it gets. i know its probably hard to think like that right now but i'm a 108 days clean and i assure you it does get easier!!! just remember to keep on keeping on, and your doing great!!!

Heidi

Renee B

Hi Charlie-
First- please don't feel you are not worthy to respond to posts because you're in a rocky place yourself! Most of us are! We still learn from you...no matter what you're going through, just hearing about it helps me stay sober. It might teach me what NOT to do, or I might gain advice on what TO do. So please know your contributions are valid!

The other thing I wanted to say is that you CAN'T have just one beer. It's such a common thing to think. But let me tell you....2 years ago I stayed sober for 6 months...and then I decided I could have a couple. Well, I did, and I actually drank "normally" for a couple months. I wouldn't drink as frequently, I would only have a couple, etc. But, as the months progressed, so did my diseas...and well, here I am! So don't let your mind mislead you that you can have just a couple...you can't! I could have 2 years sober under my belt right now, and have my life much more together and fulfilled if I hadn't had that drink 18 months ago. Instead, here I am on day 26, trying to climb my way back.

Good luck to you!
Renee

kckman

Give it another day. Living is an action verb. Grab a hold of life and live it. Make your life; the life you want to live. Only you can do that for you self. Stay strong we both know the problems adding alcohol causes. I for one hope that you wont go down that road. It always leads to the same things really. congratrs on your week.

Time4Me11

Hey Charlie

Congratulations on your one week! And PLEASE...Conratulate yourself first! Its an enormous accomplishment. I recently passed my first week. The filth that was in my system is slowly moving out, and that makes all of the difference in the world as to your mental state. You obviously have a sense of humor about it..hee hee... I have found that (and posting here) a great relief. Keep posting and sharing...and really, don't have that beer...laugh in its face!

Jupiter2

Hi CosmicCharlie,

It does take time and we do have to stick with it one day at a time. It sounds like you think that nothing has changed, but something has: you are not drinking or using. Big change. You are dealing with the wreckage and underlying problems now and that is a big change. I know what you are saying, since I am in early recovery too, but I have started to see a few (maybe just a few) glimmers of what life can be if I stay on this good path. Everyone tells me that it will get better and I am running on faith that it will and am starting to see some evidence that it is. Post as much as you can. You'll get responses, support and encouragement no matter how badly you are feeling.

Hang in there!

CosmicCharlie

Thank You all for the kind words .. I know I can't have just one beer LoL I had 3 yrs + sober and Had a "cpl" one night and Like you were saying Renee was doing the social thing pretty good\well <hate grammer lol> for awhile .. But again as you pointed out slowly slid down that road to be a lush:p Recently in Boston to see my GF I told myself well I am on vacation I can have a few LOL That seemed to be the Big mistake though cause I got back to "home" and thought well I am still on vacation technicly LOL and well yall know the rest I am here Posting so pretty obvious huh .. I just have the problem of seperation from others as well as drinking and such .. When I went 3yrs I literaly <as Renee talked about in her other Post> cut myself off .. Became a hearmit; learned about PC's found the net then evidnetly built my own and started repairing them YaY .. But now I have no one to talk to get through anything w\ .. I am in the hole I dug and even sober it seems to get deeper .. I know I should see a Shrink<not to mention a reg MD> but money is so tight right now I am not sure if I will have a place 2morrow let alone the Net or PC .. Anyway just ranting Stay Strong folks and Rememebr What the Man Said, "If you get confused, Just listen to the music play!!!!!"