At two hundred days
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Join Date: Oct 2020
Location: Near the mountains
Posts: 1,552
At two hundred days
I want to say thanks to all the members of this site new or old. Your wisdom and experience has helped me beyond words. It's so nice to have people to interact with that really understand.
At two hundred days of sobriety today my life has changed in many ways. Most of it is internal. I am calmer, more confident, patient, understanding, and at peace. There's a lot more. I can't obviously list all the benefits but they are mental, physical, and spiritual. It's positively affected every area of my life.
There are lots of challenges though. Life is still life. This is really hard work. In some ways it's harder now than in the beginning. There are things in my life that were much easier to ignore when I was drinking which now need to be addressed. It's tough to have no escape hatch. Even the promise of a fake release from worries or stress was sometimes comforting in my drinking days. Now my comfort is in knowing that I can face my life without that crutch of alcohol. I actually can. You can too.
Looking back there's only a handful of things that have changed to allow me to stay sober this time. I found them all right here on SR. Accepting that I can't start drinking again in the future, ever. Not allowing myself to romanticize alcohol. Knowing that it's only the first drink I have to avoid. Realizing that a few drinks is not going to satisfy the addiction. Doing this for my own reasons, and not worrying about how anyone else feels about it. Having a plan.
I appreciate being able to share here. If you are new or struggling or maybe even for my future self... someone here said to set my belief that I could end my addiction at 100%, and I have found out that they were correct.
At two hundred days of sobriety today my life has changed in many ways. Most of it is internal. I am calmer, more confident, patient, understanding, and at peace. There's a lot more. I can't obviously list all the benefits but they are mental, physical, and spiritual. It's positively affected every area of my life.
There are lots of challenges though. Life is still life. This is really hard work. In some ways it's harder now than in the beginning. There are things in my life that were much easier to ignore when I was drinking which now need to be addressed. It's tough to have no escape hatch. Even the promise of a fake release from worries or stress was sometimes comforting in my drinking days. Now my comfort is in knowing that I can face my life without that crutch of alcohol. I actually can. You can too.
Looking back there's only a handful of things that have changed to allow me to stay sober this time. I found them all right here on SR. Accepting that I can't start drinking again in the future, ever. Not allowing myself to romanticize alcohol. Knowing that it's only the first drink I have to avoid. Realizing that a few drinks is not going to satisfy the addiction. Doing this for my own reasons, and not worrying about how anyone else feels about it. Having a plan.
I appreciate being able to share here. If you are new or struggling or maybe even for my future self... someone here said to set my belief that I could end my addiction at 100%, and I have found out that they were correct.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 9,081
Huge congrats Five!
Also thanks for this post. As much as I read about addiction there is always something new that I stumble across. I haven't heard this:
" someone here said to set my belief that I could end my addiction at 100%,". That is a a good one.
Also I love that you acknowledge the tough stuff. It sure doesn't go away no matter how long we are sober; life still throws &^%$# at us.
May the next 200 days bring you much wisdom and increasing strength.
Also thanks for this post. As much as I read about addiction there is always something new that I stumble across. I haven't heard this:
" someone here said to set my belief that I could end my addiction at 100%,". That is a a good one.
Also I love that you acknowledge the tough stuff. It sure doesn't go away no matter how long we are sober; life still throws &^%$# at us.
May the next 200 days bring you much wisdom and increasing strength.
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Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,196
I remember about where you are at when I was done with drinking, and wasn't going back no matter what. While it was enough just to be sober to keep me going, I came face to face with the same old life problems that were still being thrown at me, and thinking, "I guess sobriety doesn't fix everything." I was not expecting that, of course. I knew better than that, but I realized that I had been carrying an expectation that something would be different about it, but not sure what that was. But it didn't seem like anything was different. This part of sobriety took much longer than the initial confidence that comes from knowing I didn't have to drink again. It was easier to put the bottle away than to deal with the unavoidable issues in life.
Eventually, something would be much different about it. But while I measure the progress of putting the bottle down in weeks and months, I measure dealing with life more in years and decades. For me that part came so slowly as to be barely perceptible. Sometimes I would solve a problem, and wonder if this was sobriety, or would I have done it anyway? But since sobriety seemed to be it's own reward, and since I managed well enough, I just kept on being sober. In looking back years later, things are truly much different. It's about enjoying what I have, and not struggling. I seem to put a lot of trivial issues on ignore without even thinking about it. When something I can do needs to be done, I roll up my sleeves and deal with it. Some of the things I don't relish rolling up my sleeves for, but I know that when I'm done, I will realize a lot of satisfaction for it.
Eventually, something would be much different about it. But while I measure the progress of putting the bottle down in weeks and months, I measure dealing with life more in years and decades. For me that part came so slowly as to be barely perceptible. Sometimes I would solve a problem, and wonder if this was sobriety, or would I have done it anyway? But since sobriety seemed to be it's own reward, and since I managed well enough, I just kept on being sober. In looking back years later, things are truly much different. It's about enjoying what I have, and not struggling. I seem to put a lot of trivial issues on ignore without even thinking about it. When something I can do needs to be done, I roll up my sleeves and deal with it. Some of the things I don't relish rolling up my sleeves for, but I know that when I'm done, I will realize a lot of satisfaction for it.
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Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Mid-Atlantic states
Posts: 1,048
Congratulations! I always enjoy your posts. And yes, life still can be hard, but at least we are no longer running from it and can face things that need to be addressed as you mentioned. 200 days is wonderful!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2020
Location: Near the mountains
Posts: 1,552
Originally Posted by DriGuy 
But while I measure the progress of putting the bottle down in weeks and months, I measure dealing with life more in years and decades. For me that part came so slowly as to be barely perceptible. Sometimes I would solve a problem, and wonder if this was sobriety, or would I have done it anyway? But since sobriety seemed to be it's own reward, and since I managed well enough, I just kept on being sober. In looking back years later, things are truly much different. It's about enjoying what I have, and not struggling. I seem to put a lot of trivial issues on ignore without even thinking about it. When something I can do needs to be done, I roll up my sleeves and deal with it. Some of the things I don't relish rolling up my sleeves for, but I know that when I'm done, I will realize a lot of satisfaction for it.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 14,145
Five for your ES&H.It is during the hard times in life that I forge a strong spirit that will overcome all other hard times to come.
Become an unstoppable force for good and the bad times will fade away.
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Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,998
There are things in my life that were much easier to ignore when I was drinking which now need to be addressed.
200 days is brilliant. Inspiring stuff, FiveT 👍👍👍👏
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Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,301
Congrats man! I relate to your posts quite a bit and I am glad you are ahead and close by. Keep blazing the trail. It's good to have someone pointing out possible thorns and pitfalls. Keep trucking. We are behind you and have your back.
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