Tomorrow is One Week... some progress today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Tomorrow is One Week... some progress today
Hi All 
Tomorrow ( in a few hours) is one week....
2 awesome things happened today
1) I have always had migraines and dizziness... ( it is such a long story but at one point I was told I had 50% of my equalibrium left... ) today I went to a new chiropractor and he took over an hour with me. He is a chriopractor that specializes in vertigo and headaches.... long story short I walked out of there feeling better then I have felt in so long... so so long. I cold cry happy tears just thinking about it.
2) I was crying and crying and crying everyday about my breakup with my boyfriend ( who I realized was abusive in the wake with the breakup ) so last night I prayed and prayed ... I asked God for some relief and last night I had a dream that felt so very real. I had a dream that I was at a house party and my ex was following me around trying to explain his abuse and asking for me back and in the dream I saw him so different. I felt annoyed by him and couldn't get away fast enough .... I woke up with a sense of peace...
1 week tomorrow. Yay
Tomorrow ( in a few hours) is one week.... 2 awesome things happened today
1) I have always had migraines and dizziness... ( it is such a long story but at one point I was told I had 50% of my equalibrium left... ) today I went to a new chiropractor and he took over an hour with me. He is a chriopractor that specializes in vertigo and headaches.... long story short I walked out of there feeling better then I have felt in so long... so so long. I cold cry happy tears just thinking about it.
2) I was crying and crying and crying everyday about my breakup with my boyfriend ( who I realized was abusive in the wake with the breakup ) so last night I prayed and prayed ... I asked God for some relief and last night I had a dream that felt so very real. I had a dream that I was at a house party and my ex was following me around trying to explain his abuse and asking for me back and in the dream I saw him so different. I felt annoyed by him and couldn't get away fast enough .... I woke up with a sense of peace...
1 week tomorrow. Yay
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Thank you guys It is really strange getting to know myself all over again... I am a romantic at heart and I watched about an hour of old rom com trailers from the 90s and early 2000s today and felt that feeling I had of promise and safety growing up... Like a teenager... It reminded me of something I had burried for a while in me....
It is really strange getting to know myself all over again... I am a romantic at heart and I watched about an hour of old rom com trailers from the 90s and early 2000s today and felt that feeling I had of promise and safety growing up... Like a teenager... It reminded me of something I had burried for a while in me....
Member
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Mid-Atlantic states
Posts: 993
One week is such a huge accomplishment. Congrats!! You have so many wonderful things in store! Keep up the excellent work of posting your emotions and the positives as well as the struggles. We are here for you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,426
Thank you for sharing AJ.
A couple of thoughts.
A danger zone for you has been during the one to two week period, yes? It is important, at least it was/is for me, to identify your danger zone and have a plan in place. When the AV comes calling again, which is now doing calisthenics just waiting for the perfect opportunity, play it forward and ask yourself if you really want to be at this same place a week from now, and again 10 days after that, and again 10 days after that, etc. Have a plan in place, like a nice coffee shop you like to hit, a run or trip to the gym if that's your thing, anything other than getting back on that miserable dark path that leads nowhere.
Feelings of having been betrayed and hurt, and the other negative emotions of resentment, anxiety, and insecurity are totally understandable. Looking forward, as you stay away from the wine, and people who seek to control and hurt you, the negative emotions will become less intense. Positive emotions and sobriety go hand in hand, just as negative emotions and drinking do.
A couple of thoughts.
A danger zone for you has been during the one to two week period, yes? It is important, at least it was/is for me, to identify your danger zone and have a plan in place. When the AV comes calling again, which is now doing calisthenics just waiting for the perfect opportunity, play it forward and ask yourself if you really want to be at this same place a week from now, and again 10 days after that, and again 10 days after that, etc. Have a plan in place, like a nice coffee shop you like to hit, a run or trip to the gym if that's your thing, anything other than getting back on that miserable dark path that leads nowhere.
Feelings of having been betrayed and hurt, and the other negative emotions of resentment, anxiety, and insecurity are totally understandable. Looking forward, as you stay away from the wine, and people who seek to control and hurt you, the negative emotions will become less intense. Positive emotions and sobriety go hand in hand, just as negative emotions and drinking do.
Yield beautiful changes
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: A home filled with love
Posts: 1,699
Good work, AJ.
I appreciate Cityboy's comments. In AA we are taught to identify resentments and move hell/high water to rid ourselves from them. Everyone has a history and struggles with different relationships/people, but folks who struggle with substance abuse have discovered a "shortcut" to deal with the negativity.
For me, it was (what I thought was an appropriate) resentment at my ex-husband for drinking away our future, emotionally and verbally abusing me, abandoning our family, harming my financial future, and killing himself. Drink it away!!!! Except......it comes back. And the resentment doesn't move. So, I was stuck, without even realizing it.
Therapy, self-help reading, meditation, AA - these are all means of dealing with the pain of the past, so that we don't have to continue numbing ourselves to "deal" with it. I know that you are doing a lot of inner work. It has helped me immensely to focus on FORGIVENESS and ACCEPTANCE as my path forward.
I appreciate Cityboy's comments. In AA we are taught to identify resentments and move hell/high water to rid ourselves from them. Everyone has a history and struggles with different relationships/people, but folks who struggle with substance abuse have discovered a "shortcut" to deal with the negativity.
For me, it was (what I thought was an appropriate) resentment at my ex-husband for drinking away our future, emotionally and verbally abusing me, abandoning our family, harming my financial future, and killing himself. Drink it away!!!! Except......it comes back. And the resentment doesn't move. So, I was stuck, without even realizing it.
Therapy, self-help reading, meditation, AA - these are all means of dealing with the pain of the past, so that we don't have to continue numbing ourselves to "deal" with it. I know that you are doing a lot of inner work. It has helped me immensely to focus on FORGIVENESS and ACCEPTANCE as my path forward.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Originally Posted by Cityboy 
Thank you for sharing AJ.
A couple of thoughts.
A danger zone for you has been during the one to two week period, yes? It is important, at least it was/is for me, to identify your danger zone and have a plan in place.
A couple of thoughts.
A danger zone for you has been during the one to two week period, yes? It is important, at least it was/is for me, to identify your danger zone and have a plan in place.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Oglsby
One week is such a huge accomplishment. Congrats!! You have so many wonderful things in store! Keep up the excellent work of posting your emotions and the positives as well as the struggles. We are here for you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by Cityboy
Thank you for sharing AJ.
A couple of thoughts.
A danger zone for you has been during the one to two week period, yes? It is important, at least it was/is for me, to identify your danger zone and have a plan in place. When the AV comes calling again, which is now doing calisthenics just waiting for the perfect opportunity, play it forward and ask yourself if you really want to be at this same place a week from now, and again 10 days after that, and again 10 days after that, etc. Have a plan in place, like a nice coffee shop you like to hit, a run or trip to the gym if that's your thing, anything other than getting back on that miserable dark path that leads nowhere.
Feelings of having been betrayed and hurt, and the other negative emotions of resentment, anxiety, and insecurity are totally understandable. Looking forward, as you stay away from the wine, and people who seek to control and hurt you, the negative emotions will become less intense. Positive emotions and sobriety go hand in hand, just as negative emotions and drinking do.
A couple of thoughts.
A danger zone for you has been during the one to two week period, yes? It is important, at least it was/is for me, to identify your danger zone and have a plan in place. When the AV comes calling again, which is now doing calisthenics just waiting for the perfect opportunity, play it forward and ask yourself if you really want to be at this same place a week from now, and again 10 days after that, and again 10 days after that, etc. Have a plan in place, like a nice coffee shop you like to hit, a run or trip to the gym if that's your thing, anything other than getting back on that miserable dark path that leads nowhere.
Feelings of having been betrayed and hurt, and the other negative emotions of resentment, anxiety, and insecurity are totally understandable. Looking forward, as you stay away from the wine, and people who seek to control and hurt you, the negative emotions will become less intense. Positive emotions and sobriety go hand in hand, just as negative emotions and drinking do.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by ToughChoices
Good work, AJ.
I appreciate Cityboy's comments. In AA we are taught to identify resentments and move hell/high water to rid ourselves from them. Everyone has a history and struggles with different relationships/people, but folks who struggle with substance abuse have discovered a "shortcut" to deal with the negativity.
For me, it was (what I thought was an appropriate) resentment at my ex-husband for drinking away our future, emotionally and verbally abusing me, abandoning our family, harming my financial future, and killing himself. Drink it away!!!! Except......it comes back. And the resentment doesn't move. So, I was stuck, without even realizing it.
Therapy, self-help reading, meditation, AA - these are all means of dealing with the pain of the past, so that we don't have to continue numbing ourselves to "deal" with it. I know that you are doing a lot of inner work. It has helped me immensely to focus on FORGIVENESS and ACCEPTANCE as my path forward.
I appreciate Cityboy's comments. In AA we are taught to identify resentments and move hell/high water to rid ourselves from them. Everyone has a history and struggles with different relationships/people, but folks who struggle with substance abuse have discovered a "shortcut" to deal with the negativity.
For me, it was (what I thought was an appropriate) resentment at my ex-husband for drinking away our future, emotionally and verbally abusing me, abandoning our family, harming my financial future, and killing himself. Drink it away!!!! Except......it comes back. And the resentment doesn't move. So, I was stuck, without even realizing it.
Therapy, self-help reading, meditation, AA - these are all means of dealing with the pain of the past, so that we don't have to continue numbing ourselves to "deal" with it. I know that you are doing a lot of inner work. It has helped me immensely to focus on FORGIVENESS and ACCEPTANCE as my path forward.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2022
Posts: 526
Originally Posted by advbike
This is a great point - look at your patterns. I tracked everything, and found remarkable consistency in the timeframes in which I tended to relapse. Generally once I made it through the first week I was okay until a weakness at the 3 week point and then again at 75 days. Almost like clockwork within a day or two. Not sure if it was physiological or psychological.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
