Hello. I am not sure where to start
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: US, Ireland, Just name it.
Posts: 1
Hello. I am not sure where to start
I am a 45 year old woman who has been drinking steadily since I was 15. Since marrying and havng a baby (now 9) and moving away from the "old world" where I was a total mess I still have not given up the booze. I gave up the other stuff but my oldest fiend is still with me. I was diagnosed bipolar II about 5 years ago and I continue to hide my drinking from my regular doctor and my pdoc. I miss so much - I race home to grab a beer instead of grabbing a basketball to play with my son or a leash to walk the dogs. I wait for everyone to go to sleep so I can get a few more brewsies down before bed. Getting up is miserable. I do it because I have to take my son to school and I have to work (I am the primary breadwinner) and I work in a corporate atmosphere. My son has begun to notice. He recently mentioned about my beer cans. I was mortified.
I am home now on disability after having my knee reconstructed. I do not return to the office until the beginning of the year. Maybe today I will try to stop - just for today.
Any responses welcome.
NMLady
I am home now on disability after having my knee reconstructed. I do not return to the office until the beginning of the year. Maybe today I will try to stop - just for today.
Any responses welcome.
NMLady
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: fumbling towards ecstasy
Posts: 2,551
Where to start? You already said it, my friend. Don't pick up that drink, just for today. One day at a time is how we build sobriety. There is freedom in sobriety and you deserve that. So do the people who love you, but you must do it for your self or be doomed to failure, in my experience.
My advice? Get to an AA meeting. Hobble to one, if need be. There you will find the support and tools you need to get and stay sober.
jojo
My advice? Get to an AA meeting. Hobble to one, if need be. There you will find the support and tools you need to get and stay sober.
jojo
Psalm 118:24
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
hAVE YOU SAID ANY THING TO YOUR HUSBAND? HAS HE SAID ANYTHING TO YOU? CONTRARY TO WHAT YOU MIGHT BELIEVE, YOUR HUSBAND MIGHT KNOW AS WELL AS YOUR SON.
LISTEN, I WENT FROM A FUNCTIONING ALKIE TO A FULL BLOWN FALLING DOWN DRUNK IN JUST A FEW SHORT YEARS. ALCOHOL ROBS YOU OF EVERY THING THAT MEANS ANYTHING TO YOU.
DO YOU DRIVE YOUR SON WHEN, YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING? DOES YOUR THOUGHTS INVOLVE YOUR NEXT DRINK INSTEAD OF, FIXING A MEAL FOR SUPPER?
DRINKING BECAME MY NO. 1 LOVE. I ALMOST LOST EVERYTHING BECAUSE OF IT. I LOST VISITATION OF MY KIDS FOR 5 YEARS. IMAGINE, NOT SEEING THAT SON FOR 5 YEARS
NOT DRINKING HAS BROUGHT ME IMMENSE SERENITY. IT'S BROUGHT MY SON BACK TO LIVING WITH ME. HIS MOTHER LEFT THE AREA AND LEFT HIM WITH ME.
GO TO A MEETING, TELL YOUR HUSBAND YOU NEED HIS SUPPORT. FIND YOU ANOTHER WOMAN IN AA TO SPONSER YOU. WHEN, YOU HAVE FREE TIME STAY IN TOUCH WITH US ON HERE. THERE'S A LOT OF SMART WOMEN ON HERE, THEY'LL GIVE U HONEST ADVICE.
CHRIS
LISTEN, I WENT FROM A FUNCTIONING ALKIE TO A FULL BLOWN FALLING DOWN DRUNK IN JUST A FEW SHORT YEARS. ALCOHOL ROBS YOU OF EVERY THING THAT MEANS ANYTHING TO YOU.
DO YOU DRIVE YOUR SON WHEN, YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING? DOES YOUR THOUGHTS INVOLVE YOUR NEXT DRINK INSTEAD OF, FIXING A MEAL FOR SUPPER?
DRINKING BECAME MY NO. 1 LOVE. I ALMOST LOST EVERYTHING BECAUSE OF IT. I LOST VISITATION OF MY KIDS FOR 5 YEARS. IMAGINE, NOT SEEING THAT SON FOR 5 YEARS
NOT DRINKING HAS BROUGHT ME IMMENSE SERENITY. IT'S BROUGHT MY SON BACK TO LIVING WITH ME. HIS MOTHER LEFT THE AREA AND LEFT HIM WITH ME.
GO TO A MEETING, TELL YOUR HUSBAND YOU NEED HIS SUPPORT. FIND YOU ANOTHER WOMAN IN AA TO SPONSER YOU. WHEN, YOU HAVE FREE TIME STAY IN TOUCH WITH US ON HERE. THERE'S A LOT OF SMART WOMEN ON HERE, THEY'LL GIVE U HONEST ADVICE.
CHRIS
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,513
Hi NMlady,
That sounds like a great idea. It is so hard to give up the friend that seems to offer you so much ut first, but then it ends up causing so much pain. Somehow it still seems like your friend. But, it will only drag you down deeper and deeper. You're right to think your life could be better without alcohol. It was unbelievable to me how obsessed I was with drinking - there was no room for anything else in my life. But, you can not drink today and begin to reclaim your life!
Love, Anna
That sounds like a great idea. It is so hard to give up the friend that seems to offer you so much ut first, but then it ends up causing so much pain. Somehow it still seems like your friend. But, it will only drag you down deeper and deeper. You're right to think your life could be better without alcohol. It was unbelievable to me how obsessed I was with drinking - there was no room for anything else in my life. But, you can not drink today and begin to reclaim your life!
Love, Anna
The Serenity Plus Plan
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: The Garden State
Posts: 157
Hello NMlady!
One of the great many lessons I learned about sobriety is that it's just for today, or this hour, or this minute. I don't worry about tomorrow or yesterday - it's about today - now.
I too missed out on so many things because my only focus was alcohol. But it doesn't have to be that way.
Stick around and one day at a time.
Richard
One of the great many lessons I learned about sobriety is that it's just for today, or this hour, or this minute. I don't worry about tomorrow or yesterday - it's about today - now.
I too missed out on so many things because my only focus was alcohol. But it doesn't have to be that way.
Stick around and one day at a time.
Richard
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Dubh Linn - Ireland
Posts: 455
(((((NMlady)))))
Dont pick up that first drink today! Seek out AA meetings and read and post here on SR - lots of wonderful people here to help and offer advice!!!! I too have used alcohol for Bi-polar for many years. Funnily the Bi-polar is not so bad when one isnt drinking. My AA sponser is actually of the belief that i am perhaps not bi-polar but rather "moody" because of the booze!!!!!
I dont have the answers to everything but I do know that one day at a time it is possible to NOT DRINK - you have that choice!!!! Take it and liberate yourself!!!!
Luvs And Recovery Ama
Dont pick up that first drink today! Seek out AA meetings and read and post here on SR - lots of wonderful people here to help and offer advice!!!! I too have used alcohol for Bi-polar for many years. Funnily the Bi-polar is not so bad when one isnt drinking. My AA sponser is actually of the belief that i am perhaps not bi-polar but rather "moody" because of the booze!!!!!
I dont have the answers to everything but I do know that one day at a time it is possible to NOT DRINK - you have that choice!!!! Take it and liberate yourself!!!!
Luvs And Recovery Ama
On The Bus
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Brattleboro, Vt.
Posts: 484
If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, then please, please try an AA Meeting. You really have a lot to lose. Trust me when I tell you that freedom, peace of mind and serenity are sooooo much better than booze and hangovers.
The miracle is in AA. Why not go find yours?
Post often, people are here for you. Mike.
The miracle is in AA. Why not go find yours?
Post often, people are here for you. Mike.
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: El Paso, Tx
Posts: 5,862
Hi and welcome!
Good advice already given. Just want you to know I was you not to long ago. I managed to muster up the courage to quit, finally, once and for all. Life is damn good now. I promise it will only get worse, much worse. There are many recovery options available to you check out our links and resources forum for your options. You'll find a great deal of support here. I quit the day I arrived. Good luck!
Good advice already given. Just want you to know I was you not to long ago. I managed to muster up the courage to quit, finally, once and for all. Life is damn good now. I promise it will only get worse, much worse. There are many recovery options available to you check out our links and resources forum for your options. You'll find a great deal of support here. I quit the day I arrived. Good luck!
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