Tee68

As I sit here and write this I am having a drink. I have maybe one more drink left in my bottle of vodka. I may or may not have the last one but regardles when I lay my head on my pillow tonight it will be knowing that I have had my last drink. I know this will be the most difficult challenge of my life. Well maybe. I used to smoke 2 packs of smokes a day and quit 10 yrs ago but in some ways I just started having a drink when I wanted to smoke and to this day if I can't drink then I still want to smoke, I have come up with a solution to combat that. My problem is I am not sure I like the sober me. I am boring, blazee, and very uninteresting. I discovered alcohol in my 20's and for the most part have been an alcoholic from the word go. I am now 52. My husband has requested that I quit as he is worried I have scarosis and I most likely do. I HAVE to show my family that I choose them over alcohol. .... that is why I am doing this. Wish me luck. I dont post often but I read alot of your posts.

SoberLeigh

Good that you are posting, Tee.

Sobriety will be a huge gift for your family, but first and foremost do this for yourself. You are worthy of an exponentially better way to live.

You are likely correct; this won’t be easy but we are here to support you along the way.

If you haven’t already done so, pour out the rest of that vodka. It has nothing worthwhile to offer.

alphaomega

Good for you !!

we will be here to cheer you on and hold you up though it all. Stay close.

Mizz

Congrats on the decision to reclaim your life. There is so much to discover and learn. So much to get interested in and to do. Getting sober for you is essential. For you. You wont regret this. I surely don't.

D122y

Being a drunk in my 20's was ok. I had tons of energy and could do stuff.

As I got older, all I wanted to do was get drunk and go to sleep.

The energy levels change.

Thank God I quit.

Get clean and stay clean.

Being a drunk is a learned behaviour. It can be unlearned.

Thanks.

Dee74

Hi and welcome back tee

Maybe like me you haven' been giving the sober you a chance to emerge from the shadows?
It took me a few months to rediscover who I was and I wasn't boring blase or uninteresting to the people who really mattered

I understand you want to do this for the family - but do it for yourself first and foremost too.
I don't think you can go wrong by embracing the person you are meant to be

Think about a plan to stay sober too - I don't think we can wing this - you need some ideas on what to do if cravings come calling.

D

D

least

I didn't like the 'sober me' only because I didn't know the 'sober me'. Once I'd been sober for a while, and was practicing gratitude every day, I found that I wasn't half bad, that I had lots of redeeming qualities.

someday

Good luck to you! I am back on Day 3 after I had 2.5 months under my belt. You are absolutely right about drinking and smoking. I notice I smoke a whole lot less when I'm not drinking. This is a great place for support. I been on and off the wagon for years and years. Finally got sober in april and blew it over something stupid.

Post every day. The responses to my posts are what keeps me going.

Steely

Welcome aboard Tee68.

Becoming sober is the very best thing you could do for both yourself, and your family.

I hope you continue to post.

Evoo

Good post. And congrats on making that decision.

I also used to think I would be “boring” without alcohol. The realty is the total opposite. I’m more active, athletic, spontaneous, creative, better at hobbies and work, and generally a happier and less anxious person…

Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises. The “fun” self-perception of our drinking personality is the addiction voice at work.

Evoo

I never really thought of it this way, but very true. In my 20s I could manage pretty well and still just be “the partier.” It really changed in my 30s.

Haris2014

hi tee,
By the sound of it you have haven’t met “Sober Tee” in 30 years so don’t write yourself off just yet. An alcoholic between drinks, hungover or trying to hide their drinking is boring, blasé and very uninteresting..I think a sober and committed “you” might just surprise yourself.

good luck tee and post often

Evoo

Love this post.

Go meet the sober you. The mental image of some boring teetotaler? That’s not real.

I’ve become a really competent home cook in my sobriety and love hosting people (I am obsessed with cooking). I’m active with my kids. I’m a present husband. I’m getting my masters degree on the side. I’m a great racquetball player. I love doing things… concerts, games, etc. where drinking me might’ve stayed home.

When I was active in my addiction, I did a fraction of those things and the addiction always came first.

DriGuy

Something strikes me as odd about not liking your sober self. I doubt that others think your drunk self is better than your sober self, and I doubt they think your sober self is boring unless they're three sheets to the wind themselves. Doing it for your family is commendable, but doing it for you seems more important. Do it for yourself and your family benefits. If they don't benefit, then what? Do you start drinking again?

I may be the exception to some rule, but I got sober for me, and I was selfish about it. Anyone who didn't like it be damned. I couldn't stand seeing myself acting like a drunk. Being called a lush no longer had the quality of loving approval as it did when I was in college. I was just a guy who didn't know how to act. But no one showed any disapproval when I got sober, surprise for some of them, but none disapproved. Least of all my drunk friends, some who understood better than most.

fishkiller

Hello tee!
1.5 years ago I made a very similar post in regards to being done with alcohol. SR has showed me the way and I have followed it.

As said, you don't even know who you are. At least I didn't.
I know after 1.5 years I am finding myself and I am not boring at all. Just the opposite.
Before I just drank. Acted like I was fun but in reality I was just drunk.
Now I actually Do stuff. I go places and meet people. Something I Never did drunk..

Driguy is right, as usual. We must do this for ourselves. Don't worry, your family will see the benefits of your sobriety but this has to be done for us.

travelbug

Welcome Tee, Hope that you made it thru the first 24 hours. Please come back for support form us all. You can do this!

Scd619x

I can so relate to the drinking more thing when not smoking, as can a lot of my friends who, when they stopped smoking, turned into a raging drinker for a while but it was short lived until they got over it. Of course we don't get over it so we keep drinking. Good luck with your day 1, keep us updated please

Boondock

Welcome Tee, I know for a fact That you'll be a much better person sober than drunk, all you have to do is embrace sobriety and recovery with the same amount of effort you use to embrace alcohol. You've just made one of the best choices you could ever make in your life.

Anna

Tee, you've made a good decision to stop drinking. And, I think you might be surprised that you like the sober you.

Dee74

Hows it going Tee?

D