JustJohn

This time of day is when my cravings hit - early to mid afternoon when my energy is high. I know many struggle in the evening and night, but if I make it to 6:00 PM I'm good - weird huh? I always tried to be finished consuming booze by about 7:00 PM so I could sleep it off and salvage part of the next day.

I ran across a couple of quotes from an article I read that I saved while I was still drinking, yet painfully aware I had to stop. I'd like to share them:

"As the famous drinker Kingsley Amis once said, it's not about being drunk, it's about getting drunk. It's about that magic moment of rapture on the way to somewhere else. The sweet spot – the exact moment when anticipation and reward are in perfect balance."

When I found that quote, it was a "eureka!" moment for me - it summed up my drinking succinctly. This one spoke to me too:

"People have told me quitting is hard. They ask me why it was easy for me. I don’t know, I say. I kept giving abstinence a chance. Abstinence won."

I have kept on giving abstinence a chance - isn't that we are all ultimately doing?

Here's the link to the article: How I Let Drinking Take Over My Life

I sincerely hope this helps someone - anyone - as we all work our plans. Thanks for reading - just typing this is helping me get through this craving.

Dee74

Thanks John

D

TheAten

Hi John

That Kingsley Amis quote is spot on! The funny thing is, when you’re an alcoholic, you either never actually get to that stage or tip past it so quickly the getting to it and aftermath are never worth that split second euphoria, are they? Still, it’s profound and it sums up perfectly where I always wanted to go by drinking but could never reach. Thank you for sharing!

Surrendered19

Thanks for sharing that JJ. My cravings were more along the timeline you are on. 3 or 3:30 to 6 was brutal at first. Once 6 rolled around though I was in the clear. I quit for good when even the magic moment of rapture was nothing but a distant memory. The last year I drank there was not a moment of pleasure in any of it. I drank because for an hour (at most) each day, instead of feeling like grim death, I could feel like not-as-grim death. I get nauseous thinking about it. Pure insanity.

least

In early sobriety, when I'd get cravings to drink, I'd walk my dogs if the weather permitted. We got out of the house, got some fresh air and sunshine, and when we got home, my craving was gone.

Steely

Thank you for your post John.

Both quotes nailed it in one.

"The way to somewhere else" can be found so beautifully in sobriety if we put in the work. Why did I ever bother with the other? I think I know, but it was a waste of time in the end.

JustJohn

I remember times the drinking didn't bring the desired pleasure as well. It was usually after too many consecutive days of drinking. I've learned through many days, weeks, and months of abstinence the pleasure will return if I drink and off I go on that downward spiral yet again. I'm working my plan to be aware of this and avoid dwelling on the desire.

sortofhomecomin

I have a friend from rehab whose drinking pattern is (was?) quite similar to yours. If she doesn't buy alcohol by 5 pm she knows she is safe for the day. On evenings when she drinks it is generally between 5 to 8 pm. She is now a week sober.

JustJohn

I do whatever I can too. Drink a lot of water or soft drinks, eat a meal, etc. I do need to walk more - my two puppers have a fenced in yard to run and play in, but they love to go for walks too.

tornrealization

I call it the witching hour. So keeping myself busy during the hours of 6-9pm it was then bedtime and I was safe for the night. Sometimes I just put myself to bed early to trick myself witching hour was over. I felt like a grumpy kid getting grounded when I did that but I did not consider drinking any further for the night. I do find it helpful to know your trigger hours and to have little plans to get through them. Like least did, walk a dog, or just do something not normal. I was watching tv, so maybe I cleaned, grounded myself, walk, read on SR...anything to get to safe zone.

It gets better and easier the longer you go. Suddenly you’re filling the time or enjoying the downtime.

AlbaSober

How far into your sober journey did the "witching hour" cravings diminish? I see you'd about 14 months sobriety.

Anna

Thanks for the post, John.

My witching hour was 5-8pm and it was really a struggle to get through those hours. I don't have a dog, but I did begin taking long walks and those saved me.

WhiskeyBent

with ya jj. 3 - 6pm. deadly want to drink. 6:05pm - im good, dont need it.

3 - 6 is now when i go for a long walk and make dinner. something else.

least

Walking my dogs (now just one dog) always made me feel happy. I loved taking them for walks to watch them carefully checking their peemail. Just watching them 'being dogs' made me feel good. I also felt good that my sobriety meant I was taking good care of them and not neglecting their needs.

Take your puppers for a nice walk. They'll appreciate it and you'll feel better for it.

tornrealization

I believe I felt it ease up significantly by 3 months for me. Now I don’t have witching hour cravings as the habit was broken. Year 1 - is battle of the witching hour, then holidays, then whatever life throws at you good and bad and getting it through it sober. Year 2 was even less cravings and now I had experienced all these things sober at least once, my sober muscles made things easier.

least

I felt far fewer cravings and desires to drink after I started practicing gratitude every day.

lifewithart

This was such a great share and I enjoyed the responses. I recently added an evening ritual to replace that moment when I used to start drinking.
I watched a video on YouTube about A "Reset ritual" for the evenings. It has been quite impactful.
Sending you all love and so grateful to be sober.

DriGuy

I read someplace that a study found that cravings diminish when an alcoholic simply plans to drink. It's almost like they don't actually need the drink, but knowing they will drink lessens the craving. I've experienced that too. I could relax once I knew help was on the way. I remember that sweet spot. Another one was the momentary glow, which in my early drinking seemed like it lasted, but toward the end that glow was measured in seconds, and then the dullness of drink after drink would set in.

For me it goes a little beyond giving it a chance. When I drank, I just let things happen to me. Sobriety is not something I just let happen to me. It's something I actively participate in. Early on, I cultivated it, filled it with things, and constantly practiced gratitude. I still don't see it as giving abstinence a chance. I embrace it.

Aellyce

I've logged my drinking urges in a spreadsheet since my first week sober and it shows a strong pattern of cravings starting either around 9-10am in the morning or early afternoon like yours, John. The strongest and most stubborn urges correspond nicely with what I'd already known as my main triggers, and times of day when I most frequently would decide to drink - it makes perfect sense to me. My goal with this "urge log" is to link it with everything else I can discover about my cravings, triggers and to track how well my various coping methods are working. It's been very interesting and useful, a great tool I originally picked up from the SMART program. Focusing on recording everything about the urges while in the middle of them is also a great distraction that has helped me stay focused on going through them without acting out and trying many different ways of coping. It's also reinforcing to see the cravings becoming much less frequent and powerful over time, more rewarding now than any intoxication