Hope1989

Hi everyone,

I am just writing this to remind myself that I did accomplish something this year: I stopped drinking. I want to be grateful for something.

In early January, I took my last drink. Little would I know that this will give me a fighting chance. I have been suffering from severe mental health issues as a result of poor medical treatment and just my underlying conditions. I have gone through the most horrific symptoms anyone can imagine. Any terror movie you have watched falls short.

I have spent most of the second half of the year in and out of psychiatric units. Until today without any success. I am having a horrible time. BUT there is absolutely no r way I could have battled this if I was drinking. I would have lost a long time ago.

Listen, I do not know if I will recover. I am dealing with crippling anxiety, depression, and OCD. All by myself. In a lockdown.

However, I want to be grateful because I am still alive and fighting. I lose perspective quite easily but I do have hope.

Now more than ever I understand and have sympathy for all of us who are struggling with addiction and/or mental health conditions. We are true warriors.

I want to wish everyone a happy new year. A big hug. You guys are not alone. Stay connected and keep trying.

Best,

Hope

Erica375

Hello, Hope! I'm sorry you're having such a tough time, but I'm glad you're here with us. Some days all we can do is get through. I know I have some psychological issues to work through, too. I can't say I'm looking forward to that work, but I will keep trying to better myself.

Happy New Year, my dear!

Dee74

Stories like yours are an inspiration to me Hope. The resilience of humanity under immense pressure is amazing.
Not entirely sure if that makes any difference, but I wanted you to know that I’m really rooting for you

D

Devizes

((((Hope)))) Giving up drinking is a fabulous achievement in any year, but so much more in a year like this. Be proud. Huge hugs to you

FreeOwl

hey hope...

you're not alone, either.

Thank you for sharing... stick around.... it'll be OK.

Bubovski

Nothing endures except change and I sincerely hope you will find change for the better, and soon.

RAL

Many congrats on your sober time

I hope your health improves in 2021.

sugarbear1

Sending you healing wishes, love, and hugs

SnazzyDresser

Good going, Hope! Now that's fighting the good fight I'd say. Change can be brutally hard, that's for sure. Gotta fight to keep hope alive every day, and you're doing it literally!

advbike

Hang in there Hope, you are fighting the good fight. Please keep posting and here's a big < HUG > for you and a wish that 2021treats you better!

WaterOx

Hey buddy. You want a good laugh? I remember when you told me that I was an inspiration to you. My how the tables have turned. You really have become an inspiration to me and while I know you're hurting I still admire all that you have done. I still believe in you bro. See you in 2021!

bandicoot2

(((Hope))) Thank you for sharing what you're going through. Sobriety definitely gives us a better chance of successfully fighting the other battles. Wishing you all the best and sending you a huge hug!!

Steely

With you all the way Hope.

Hope 2021 is good to you.

SR will be.

EndGameNYC

I'm sorry for what you've been going through, Hope.

Mental health is an often overlooked priority. Stigma. Mediocre insurance coverage. Difficulties in accessing services. And, because this is America, as long as you have a job, a nice car, and a place to live, and you don't make too much trouble, then all you need is a beer, a raise, or a kick in the ass.

I don't know whether or not you're getting adequate treatment or where you live; I know only what I read in your post. I believe that all fifty states have an office of mental health. Some cities have them too. There are also local organizations that may help.

Several hotlines have come into being since we became aware of the pandemic last winter, many of which are specifically geared to matters of mental health; referrals, counseling, or someone to talk to. Phone, texting, or, in some cases, FaceTime, Zoom and the like. You can even have therapy sessions using current technology.

Nonprofits also offer assistance:

https://www.nami.org/Home

https://www.verywellmind.com/leading...ations-4147842

https://www.choosingtherapy.com/top-...organizations/

Hope1989

Thank you everyone for your replies. Each one was very valuable to me.

It is indeed a rough road and a painful journey, but the last days I've finally seen some improvements.

Theres hope right?

Be123

There is always hope, and your short story has topped up my levels so thank you very much. I also found your story inspirational, you've done so well to cope with all that has been thrown t you and to still be living soberly.

Ill send some hope back over to you, it's an Amazon delivery so check down behind your bin 😉