Renegade2

Being an alcoholic makes us learn how an alcoholic functions. We can spot easier than others, when someone else might be an alcoholic too.

Some say gays have a "gaydar", some sort of radar that detects other gays. Well, I can say that, just like gays have their radar, we, alcholics, might have our own radar too.

I've spotted some alcoholics in these past few years. For example, at work, we have a senior executive that has a long and bright career in business. I knew in the past he had some problems with booze and drugs (15 years ago), but managed to keep his career. Sometimes we go have lunch with him and, knowing about his past, I took special attention to him and noticed several things: shaky hands, the bottle of wine was always near him at the table, red and bloated face.

What about you? Do you notice any of this behaviour in others?

Pelagic263

One word: yes. I think the look is mostly scared, mostly self-recognition.

DriGuy

I think I often can, but I don't have absolute faith in my Alki-dar.

DreamCatcher17

I can spot someone who is wasted, drunk, or tipsy. Not my call if they are in fact an alcoholic and I would not call someone out on their stuff UNLESS this was a person I love and respect.

Sober45

I can and I look for them. I had to go to a family gathering last weekend and I took note of who they were. I think many more people are dealing with this issue than we think. Makes me feel so grateful to be on the other side.

Pelagic263

I guess I was thinking about the ones you see at the liquor store in the morning. Not exactly social drinkers, neither was I at the end.
We were haunted looking, terrified, addicted.

Nonsensical

I have my suspicions. It's interesting, but it's not my place to diagnose.
No one else's drinking was ever my problem.
My drinking was definitely my problem.

nez

I probably can, but I don't really pay any attention to those blips on my radar screen because there are other blips that provide better insight into potential areas that might impact me more and that give me more latitude in adjusting my sails.

Pelagic263

Well, that's quite a metaphor!

Zebra1275

I can certainly spot "red flags" in someone's drinking behavior. But it's not my job to label.

During my drinking career, I'm sure somewhere, sometime, someone wondered about my drinking.

I thought I kept it well hidden, and nobody ever said anything, but I'm sure it wasn't as well hidden as I imagined it to be.

nez

serenity prayer in nez-speak

Pelagic263

Sounds right. Carry on.

Sunflowerlife

I think it's easy to sense when someone has an unhealthy relationship to alcohol, yes. Especially if you have had one yourself.

lessgravity

I don't use the word alcoholic but I can certainly sense when I'm around someone who has a problem with controlling their alcohol intake. There are levels to this of course - we all know that with our own experience. Someone might have seen me at 30 and thought I drank too much, but if the same person saw me at 40 they might think I was close to ruining my life.

Be123

I see this the other way - how obvious must it have been I was an alkie! I thought I hid it so well, but what a fool!!!!

Embarrassing and another thing to add to the list of 'Why I don't drink'

Eddiebuckle

I notice others who show the signs of problem drinking. I also remember how resistant I was to any unsolicited advice on my "choice to drink." It wasn't until I right and truly hated the trajectory of my life and accepted that there was no choice left to not drink, that I became willing to do anything possible to become sober. When people ask for help, I give it freely. Until someone is at that point, my input is at best ineffective and quite possibly harmful to their open mindedness when they do reach that dreadful jumping off place.