A holiday and a wedding - observing the drinkers
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A holiday and a wedding - observing the drinkers
I’m just back in the UK after a week in mainland Europe where I’d attended a wedding. Am I insane to not only fly during this pandemic but also attend a wedding albeit low key and outdoors? Yes! I’m not legally obliged to self-isolate, but I’ll be minimising contact over the next week or two in case I picked up a dose of Covid.
Anyway, I’m 20 months sober and have been away a few times since I quit so I wasn’t overly worried about huge cravings or relapsing. In fact, the reverse applies. On the flights too and fro, the free booze was flowing, which is fine, but I observed those who were having more than one drink on such a short flight. They were invariably chubby and generally out of shape.
The wedding was nice but booze was unlimited. No one was falling over drunk or slurring their speech, but one guy I was talking to had around 6 or 7 large beers. Now I’m lucky to be slim having been obese for much of my life, so I can’t help noticing the physiques of others. All the drinkers had ample bellies. Just like smoking, the effects become very noticeable after a certain age.
I can 100% say the wedding and holiday was better without booze. I didn’t need any lubrication to strike up a conversation in English or my other (rusty) languages. For everyone who thinks drinking looks cool or sophisticated, there will be countless drinkers who think it must be twice as cool and sophisticated to not drink, be slim and be able to go off and do other things after a party than wobble home and fall into bed.
I’d been a heavy drinker from around 2000 to 2018, and it seemed an alien concept to stop drinking. I was an obese wreck. Wherever I went, alcohol was the priority. Withdrawal was obviously going to be hard, but the strong cravings, insomnia and anxiety lasted only a matter of weeks. For that few weeks of discomfort, I’ve got my life back and more. Anyone in withdrawal right now, hang on in there and the rewards will be many times greater than you could ever imagine.
Anyway, I’m 20 months sober and have been away a few times since I quit so I wasn’t overly worried about huge cravings or relapsing. In fact, the reverse applies. On the flights too and fro, the free booze was flowing, which is fine, but I observed those who were having more than one drink on such a short flight. They were invariably chubby and generally out of shape.
The wedding was nice but booze was unlimited. No one was falling over drunk or slurring their speech, but one guy I was talking to had around 6 or 7 large beers. Now I’m lucky to be slim having been obese for much of my life, so I can’t help noticing the physiques of others. All the drinkers had ample bellies. Just like smoking, the effects become very noticeable after a certain age.
I can 100% say the wedding and holiday was better without booze. I didn’t need any lubrication to strike up a conversation in English or my other (rusty) languages. For everyone who thinks drinking looks cool or sophisticated, there will be countless drinkers who think it must be twice as cool and sophisticated to not drink, be slim and be able to go off and do other things after a party than wobble home and fall into bed.
I’d been a heavy drinker from around 2000 to 2018, and it seemed an alien concept to stop drinking. I was an obese wreck. Wherever I went, alcohol was the priority. Withdrawal was obviously going to be hard, but the strong cravings, insomnia and anxiety lasted only a matter of weeks. For that few weeks of discomfort, I’ve got my life back and more. Anyone in withdrawal right now, hang on in there and the rewards will be many times greater than you could ever imagine.
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Good that you made it through the flights and the wedding without any alcohol. I think I'd be too scared to fly at the moment. Well I'm scared to fly at any time but especially at the moment. All that air is just recirculating around the cabin. How many people were at the wedding? The police had to break up two wedding parties in the UK at the weekend, one attended by over 100 people, all crammed into a pub which is just plain stupid. At least the one you attended was outdoors. If you were in a country that's not deemed a risk then you should be fine.
Yes, weddings are often just an excuse for people to drink too much so good that you didn't feel under any pressure to join in. And congratulations on 20 months and on losing weight.
Yes, weddings are often just an excuse for people to drink too much so good that you didn't feel under any pressure to join in. And congratulations on 20 months and on losing weight.
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Thanks Robbie, how are you getting on?
It really is a mindset thing once you decide to quit for good. I was never a whisky drinker, but at the wedding I opened a bottle and sniffed to see what the fuss was about. I don’t really have any fear about being around alcohol, but like any ex-drinker aka alcoholic in remission, I know I’d be back to my old ways within weeks if I tried to drink in moderation.
The last time I went out drinking was up your way in early 2018, but even then I’d cut right down so had a lot of breaks with water or just walks outside. My friends there now know I stopped drinking 100% and are all fine with it. I have to say they all look the worse for wear!
It really is a mindset thing once you decide to quit for good. I was never a whisky drinker, but at the wedding I opened a bottle and sniffed to see what the fuss was about. I don’t really have any fear about being around alcohol, but like any ex-drinker aka alcoholic in remission, I know I’d be back to my old ways within weeks if I tried to drink in moderation.
The last time I went out drinking was up your way in early 2018, but even then I’d cut right down so had a lot of breaks with water or just walks outside. My friends there now know I stopped drinking 100% and are all fine with it. I have to say they all look the worse for wear!
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Originally Posted by Hodd 
Thanks Robbie, how are you getting on?
It really is a mindset thing once you decide to quit for good. I was never a whisky drinker, but at the wedding I opened a bottle and sniffed to see what the fuss was about. I don’t really have any fear about being around alcohol, but like any ex-drinker aka alcoholic in remission, I know I’d be back to my old ways within weeks if I tried to drink in moderation.
The last time I went out drinking was up your way in early 2018, but even then I’d cut right down so had a lot of breaks with water or just walks outside. My friends there now know I stopped drinking 100% and are all fine with it. I have to say they all look the worse for wear!
It really is a mindset thing once you decide to quit for good. I was never a whisky drinker, but at the wedding I opened a bottle and sniffed to see what the fuss was about. I don’t really have any fear about being around alcohol, but like any ex-drinker aka alcoholic in remission, I know I’d be back to my old ways within weeks if I tried to drink in moderation.
The last time I went out drinking was up your way in early 2018, but even then I’d cut right down so had a lot of breaks with water or just walks outside. My friends there now know I stopped drinking 100% and are all fine with it. I have to say they all look the worse for wear!
Were you up in the Newcastle area back in early 2018? I haven't been to Newcastle for a while now, possibly a couple of years. I live halfway between Newcastle and Sunderland and was in Sunderland last week for a hospital appointment. When I was younger, late teens and early 20s, I did most of my drinking in Sunderland rather than Newcastle (despite the fact I support Newcastle United!) as most of my friends I went to school with were from the Wearside area. Being back in Sunderland did bring on some thoughts of wanting to have a drink as I know the city - sadly, especially the pubs - inside out. However I deliberately only took enough money for my bus fare and for a bite to eat then after my appointment I got myself straight back home. I'm glad I did as when I got back home I got an invite to a caravan park in Northumberland for the weekend. Had I stayed in Sunderland I would have both drank and missed the chance of getting away for a few days.
It's good that your friends accept that you have quit drinking and aren't putting you under any pressure to do so. They sound like a good set of friends.
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Hi Robbie, you’re getting there. One day you will be able to fly sober. Don’t you think that’s a shame you don’t remember Amsterdam? Sober holidays are genuinely refreshing, so hopefully you’ll go back there.
But you’re right to be cautious for now. I wouldn’t have gone to a wedding early on.
And yes, my friends are in Newcastle. I’ve known them nearly 30 years. I really would have no time for anyone who didn’t respect someone else’s wish not to drink.
Keep at it 👍
But you’re right to be cautious for now. I wouldn’t have gone to a wedding early on.
And yes, my friends are in Newcastle. I’ve known them nearly 30 years. I really would have no time for anyone who didn’t respect someone else’s wish not to drink.
Keep at it 👍
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Thanks for the post Hodd. I can remember making lots of observations like these when sober. Great to see posts from others. I do the same thing as far as observing others appearances and relate them to drinking etc. I think it is my way of seeking validation that my choice of sobriety is in fact the best one.
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I’m sure you look great, Max, with your sober time and exercise routine 👍
We shouldn’t judge other people on their looks, but there’s no rule to say we can’t judge ourselves. I look at old photos of myself and know full well what others thought - lazy slob! They were right.
We shouldn’t judge other people on their looks, but there’s no rule to say we can’t judge ourselves. I look at old photos of myself and know full well what others thought - lazy slob! They were right.
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