Fell off
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
This can be the best or the worst feeling.....
For "me" (I call myself an active alcoholic even thou I haven't drank in 5 days today) when I fall off on Day 1 it is the best feeling because I have usually built my body back up to a point of "healthy" that I can sustain a lower amount of alcohol...catch a buzz....wash all the cares of the world away....and get sufficiently trashed and pass out and wake up the next day and not feel "so" bad....and tell myself that its "ok" I just won't repeat it....BUT THEN.....that is exactly when everything goes wrong.....
I only 1x was able to drink just ONE DAY...in the last 5 years. So because I did it that one time....I thought I was in control of this "thing". And tried it again...and again...and again...and never since have I been able to drink for just ONE DAY. A lot say I can't just have one drink....I can't do that ever either...but I can't ever just drink for one Day and that is when I realize that falling off is the worst feeling.....
Everytime I think of drinking again...I try to remember that in the end it is the worst feeling, it is not worth it, I can not handle my "booze", booze will kill me sooner rather than later because I am 56 now...and have a form of dementia....
You fell off...I'm sorry....falling off truly sucks if your an alcoholic....and the further you get into the disease...the worst it gets....some of us get lucky and a switch goes off....the "DONE" switch...and some of us do not get that lucky.
That happened to me once...my "DONE" switch came on...and I was sober 8 years..The problem was I thought I had it licked...I thought I could be a normal drinker so I turned the switch back on...and I can't find it again to turn off....IF you find it....DONT EVER TURN IT BACK ON.
For "me" (I call myself an active alcoholic even thou I haven't drank in 5 days today) when I fall off on Day 1 it is the best feeling because I have usually built my body back up to a point of "healthy" that I can sustain a lower amount of alcohol...catch a buzz....wash all the cares of the world away....and get sufficiently trashed and pass out and wake up the next day and not feel "so" bad....and tell myself that its "ok" I just won't repeat it....BUT THEN.....that is exactly when everything goes wrong.....
I only 1x was able to drink just ONE DAY...in the last 5 years. So because I did it that one time....I thought I was in control of this "thing". And tried it again...and again...and again...and never since have I been able to drink for just ONE DAY. A lot say I can't just have one drink....I can't do that ever either...but I can't ever just drink for one Day and that is when I realize that falling off is the worst feeling.....
Everytime I think of drinking again...I try to remember that in the end it is the worst feeling, it is not worth it, I can not handle my "booze", booze will kill me sooner rather than later because I am 56 now...and have a form of dementia....
You fell off...I'm sorry....falling off truly sucks if your an alcoholic....and the further you get into the disease...the worst it gets....some of us get lucky and a switch goes off....the "DONE" switch...and some of us do not get that lucky.
That happened to me once...my "DONE" switch came on...and I was sober 8 years..The problem was I thought I had it licked...I thought I could be a normal drinker so I turned the switch back on...and I can't find it again to turn off....IF you find it....DONT EVER TURN IT BACK ON.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
You had a decent run your last go at sobriety. I am a chronic relapser. I keep trying though. Some people get it their first try, some their 1000th try. The important thing is that you never stop trying.
Samantha
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Wastinglife 
You had a decent run your last go at sobriety. I am a chronic relapser. I keep trying though. Some people get it their first try, some their 1000th try. The important thing is that you never stop trying.
Samantha
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Hevyn
AR - When that happened to me I was even more determined to reclaim my life. I was finally convinced I couldn't touch a drop. You can win this - there is no doubt.
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