For posterity
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Join Date: Feb 2015
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For posterity
Not sure how much of this post relates to alcoholism, but there is an alcoholism slant to it.
This is historic times and its not good for the mind. I don't even live in very restricted area and I am very uncomfortable. I am homebody, I should be in heaven, I am not.
This would be one of the easiest times in the world to just drink myself to death, but I can't, and i won't. But I will admit, its not easy. I have kind of been through long periods of "nothing" before in my life, so its not totally foreign to me, but still sucks.
On the positive side, started walking which is hard for me because of my knees, but I am toughing it out. Me, my wife and my golden retriever walk 2 miles a day. I never watch movies but have started signing into Netflix to pass the time. I'm currently watching a show about Sigmund Freud.
Now reality, I see far too many good people either drinking themselves to death or worse because of the intense pressure that this is "the end". I have my own views on it and if you want to hear them, PM me. Otherwise I simply advise to stay strong. You are tougher than you think.
This is historic times and its not good for the mind. I don't even live in very restricted area and I am very uncomfortable. I am homebody, I should be in heaven, I am not.
This would be one of the easiest times in the world to just drink myself to death, but I can't, and i won't. But I will admit, its not easy. I have kind of been through long periods of "nothing" before in my life, so its not totally foreign to me, but still sucks.
On the positive side, started walking which is hard for me because of my knees, but I am toughing it out. Me, my wife and my golden retriever walk 2 miles a day. I never watch movies but have started signing into Netflix to pass the time. I'm currently watching a show about Sigmund Freud.
Now reality, I see far too many good people either drinking themselves to death or worse because of the intense pressure that this is "the end". I have my own views on it and if you want to hear them, PM me. Otherwise I simply advise to stay strong. You are tougher than you think.
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Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 255
Hey Jeff - I don't see anyone drinking that much where I am, just people bored and worried about money (me included).
That is cool you have a Golden Retriever. I can't afford a dog right now but one day....
Really glad you posted!
That is cool you have a Golden Retriever. I can't afford a dog right now but one day....
Really glad you posted!
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hey Jeff
As you know thoughts are thoughts - it what we do with those thoughts that counts.
The fear is real, but the promises of alcohol to 'fix everything' are not.
Thanks for your post.
As you know thoughts are thoughts - it what we do with those thoughts that counts.
The fear is real, but the promises of alcohol to 'fix everything' are not.
Thanks for your post.
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Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: NY
Posts: 327
I live in NY , the hot zone. My wife works at a hospital with many covid patients. She comes home takes a shower I bag her clothes up and wash them the next day. She sees death everyday. Teenagers are home from school they think it’s a vacation.
My Facebook page has the usual wine and drinking memes, I think people are hitting it pretty heavy. I haven’t thought of a drink and I feel pretty zen. I owe it to the program. I can’t control most of this stuff. Hey I mop the kitchen and bathrooms everyday wipe down handles doorknobs etc. change sheets everyday. Bad thing is the weather has been lousy here, so that restricts me.
I do volunteer basically dropping off groceries to the elderly.
It’s a miracle that I’m sober , a gift .ive been doing AA zoom meetings daily, they’re ok . Maybe it’s because I let go, let god I don’t know. Tell you what it’s slot better than being hammered and useless everyday which I would have been.
Does this make sense I don’t know. Be safe everyone.
My Facebook page has the usual wine and drinking memes, I think people are hitting it pretty heavy. I haven’t thought of a drink and I feel pretty zen. I owe it to the program. I can’t control most of this stuff. Hey I mop the kitchen and bathrooms everyday wipe down handles doorknobs etc. change sheets everyday. Bad thing is the weather has been lousy here, so that restricts me.
I do volunteer basically dropping off groceries to the elderly.
It’s a miracle that I’m sober , a gift .ive been doing AA zoom meetings daily, they’re ok . Maybe it’s because I let go, let god I don’t know. Tell you what it’s slot better than being hammered and useless everyday which I would have been.
Does this make sense I don’t know. Be safe everyone.
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I guess I kind of had my cheerleader hat on yesterday. The reason I said what I said about drinking so much is that I've noticed on our walk there is two houses that are "partying" both times we went. And we go walking at about 1:00PM. Maybe I am making assumptions I shouldn't be.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
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Jeff, I get it and the first word that came to mind is "control." Something we don't have, but then again we do- if we choose to take care of ourselves, our families and how we spend time. The online meetings have been great and I even took 2 days off the grid and actually watching a tv series (yep, binge life!) w/o doing something else at the same time was...strange and good.
And I'm w Kdon on a lot- another reason a break from social media was good is that alongside all the sober support stuff there is a ton of party happy hour stuff taken online. It was also too much for me by last wkd that I spent so much time setting up online recovery mtgs for 15 cities plus a national meeting, for the restaurant recovery group I lead. Oh and 7M jobs lost in the industry stresses *some*...
My emotional sobriety is what I always talk about and I cannot tell you how good it was that over the wkd, as I was suffering a lot of stuff emotional and phsyical, I was able to call my drs Mon and get seen or moved up by GP, psych and therapist. Now we have a plan.
All that, plus getting back to walking (just did!) and other stuff good for me, is stuff I can control.
Then there's always ice cream.
And I'm w Kdon on a lot- another reason a break from social media was good is that alongside all the sober support stuff there is a ton of party happy hour stuff taken online. It was also too much for me by last wkd that I spent so much time setting up online recovery mtgs for 15 cities plus a national meeting, for the restaurant recovery group I lead. Oh and 7M jobs lost in the industry stresses *some*...
My emotional sobriety is what I always talk about and I cannot tell you how good it was that over the wkd, as I was suffering a lot of stuff emotional and phsyical, I was able to call my drs Mon and get seen or moved up by GP, psych and therapist. Now we have a plan.
All that, plus getting back to walking (just did!) and other stuff good for me, is stuff I can control.
Then there's always ice cream.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
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Jeff - good to see you. I also have been reflecting on not drinking during this time and it's just so valuable in a time of crisis not to be living a life in thrall to the demon(s) we might have and instead have a clear head and body to be able to deal with what life brings. Thank you for the post.
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^LG- don't know about you but my alcoholic mind would have gone down the "well the liquor stores are considered an essential business, so taking Lyft to one is totally doable." Yeah, super glad I'm not in that place anymore!
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
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I’ve been feeling anxiety with the current state of our world, I think we all are. Drinking has not once been a thought. I have friends that are hosting Zoom Happy Hours, not something I’m interested in.
I have found walking each day to be helpful. I’m glad you’re able to do that Jeff! Sounds like a good way to spend time with your wife as well.
I have found walking each day to be helpful. I’m glad you’re able to do that Jeff! Sounds like a good way to spend time with your wife as well.
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Originally Posted by Delilah1 
I’ve been feeling anxiety with the current state of our world, I think we all are. Drinking has not once been a thought. I have friends that are hosting Zoom Happy Hours, not something I’m interested in.
I have found walking each day to be helpful. I’m glad you’re able to do that Jeff! Sounds like a good way to spend time with your wife as well.
I have found walking each day to be helpful. I’m glad you’re able to do that Jeff! Sounds like a good way to spend time with your wife as well.
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I am going to add this post and if you wish to contribute I'd appreciate (don't want to start a new thread).
My wife is up my rear end about getting back to work. She's not native to the US, but Peru. I told her she's nuts. 10 million people filed for unemployment in the last 2 weeks. Schools are closed, gyms/health clubs closed, and all "non essential" businesses are shut down and she thinks I'm going to run out and find a job? C'mon. That is insulting to me. I looked today and the jobs that are available are part time $13 per hour on the overnight shift. Sorry, don't want to be a snob, but I don't and won't take that job.
Furthermore, I think many of the jobs she's looking at for me, because as I said before she controls every aspect of my life, are jobs on the internet that simply have not been pulled yet.
She can be so unreasonable. We are not wealthy but its not like we have $6 in our savings.
My wife is up my rear end about getting back to work. She's not native to the US, but Peru. I told her she's nuts. 10 million people filed for unemployment in the last 2 weeks. Schools are closed, gyms/health clubs closed, and all "non essential" businesses are shut down and she thinks I'm going to run out and find a job? C'mon. That is insulting to me. I looked today and the jobs that are available are part time $13 per hour on the overnight shift. Sorry, don't want to be a snob, but I don't and won't take that job.
Furthermore, I think many of the jobs she's looking at for me, because as I said before she controls every aspect of my life, are jobs on the internet that simply have not been pulled yet.
She can be so unreasonable. We are not wealthy but its not like we have $6 in our savings.
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Join Date: Sep 2018
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Hey Jeff - I think everyone is just very stressed out. Maybe take a break from each other - walk around the block? My best friend/business partner had a huge fight on email yesterday. - and we never fight. Made up today. Everyone is on edge about money, bills and jobs, etc. If you need a break - get out of the house for a little while? Take the dog for a walk?
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Couldn't you do some kind of work from home? There are so many things people can do online even without any extensive skill set or only with minimal training. Just google. Many might not pay very much either, but even just for the sake of distraction and peace of mind that you are doing something? Ruminating over the discomfort of the lockdown constantly is not healthy for anyone. I can do most of my normal work from home but sometimes get a bit lazy... then always feel so much better when I get back to it and do something productive. Honestly, if I lived with someone who normally works and occupied with things and is now obviously uncomfortable and restless, I would also insist that they found something useful and engaging to do. Not only/necessarily for the money.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
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Tough times Jeff. Hang in there. I get not wanting to stock super market shelves at midnight. But darn I'm so glad someone does.
I have not seen any partying but I live in a quiet suburb.
Oh boy the President is babbling his must see TV. Gotta motor. Take care friend.
I have not seen any partying but I live in a quiet suburb.
Oh boy the President is babbling his must see TV. Gotta motor. Take care friend.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
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I'm sorry you feel some jobs are beneath you - surprises me a little cos based on conversations we've had I didn't think you were the kind who minded getting their hands dirty.
I do understand self esteem tho and if a basic wage job is gonna mess with your mental health so be it.
Hope the zoom thing works out then.
D
I do understand self esteem tho and if a basic wage job is gonna mess with your mental health so be it.
Hope the zoom thing works out then.
D
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Dee, I don't necessarily feel that there are jobs that are beneath me, but I am kind of old school in terms of "i've paid my dues". Those overnight jobs that pay nothing are the jobs I held when younger. I'm not going to take away from those young lads. I simply want a so called 9-5 job and be on my way. I am obviously wrong in that thinking, but that's how I feel right now.
Maybe I have a picture in my head about society and the job market that is severely skewed.
I do feel like I've put in a "lifetime" of work at my age and am not really hungry or ambitious to jump back into the shark tank. But i might have to. And if I do, I will be humiliated because those young whipper snappers like my younger self will put me to shame. So, what do ya do? (in my best Italian).
Maybe I have a picture in my head about society and the job market that is severely skewed.
I do feel like I've put in a "lifetime" of work at my age and am not really hungry or ambitious to jump back into the shark tank. But i might have to. And if I do, I will be humiliated because those young whipper snappers like my younger self will put me to shame. So, what do ya do? (in my best Italian).
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Originally Posted by thomas11
Dee, I don't necessarily feel that there are jobs that are beneath me, but I am kind of old school in terms of "i've paid my dues". Those overnight jobs that pay nothing are the jobs I held when younger. I'm not going to take away from those young lads. I simply want a so called 9-5 job and be on my way. I am obviously wrong in that thinking, but that's how I feel right now.
Maybe I have a picture in my head about society and the job market that is severely skewed.
I do feel like I've put in a "lifetime" of work at my age and am not really hungry or ambitious to jump back into the shark tank. But i might have to. And if I do, I will be humiliated because those young whipper snappers like my younger self will put me to shame. So, what do ya do? (in my best Italian).
Maybe I have a picture in my head about society and the job market that is severely skewed.
I do feel like I've put in a "lifetime" of work at my age and am not really hungry or ambitious to jump back into the shark tank. But i might have to. And if I do, I will be humiliated because those young whipper snappers like my younger self will put me to shame. So, what do ya do? (in my best Italian).
is “all work is honorable work”. I think you should be honest with yourself. It doesn’t sound like you’re worried about taking the jobs from the “young lads”. There is no job you shouldn’t count yourself lucky to have.
“So, what do ya do?”
You get one.
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Join Date: Oct 2013
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Sitting at home feeling resentful is setting up for a relapse.
At least a part time job gets you out of the house with positive cash flow, with the added bonus of getting your wife off your back.
Gotta restart somewhere Jeff. Staying at home doesn’t seem to be working well, and is perhaps stoking up your AV.
I’m sorry things are so difficult right now. Backlash from a bad relapse can really resonate in a family for quite a long time.
At least a part time job gets you out of the house with positive cash flow, with the added bonus of getting your wife off your back.
Gotta restart somewhere Jeff. Staying at home doesn’t seem to be working well, and is perhaps stoking up your AV.
I’m sorry things are so difficult right now. Backlash from a bad relapse can really resonate in a family for quite a long time.
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Thanks for the post Jeff. I think old school tough would be taking any job right now. I hope we aren't coming into a few years time when there might be 20 people lining up to take each low-paying night job there is. I think you should take one of those gigs. Just for now. Do your best and then take stock in two months. I think that wouldn't just be old school. It would also be totally bada$$.
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