skybert

Hi all!
I need some support here...

After a very bad night, I have countless panick attacks, I am in rapid cycling (bipolar), my head feels like exploding and I sweat buckets.
I sincerely hope this is only WD...
I have been out with my dog, and to the grocerystore. Bought remedies for homemade pizza (I am actually good at making pizza (selftap)), and four big bottles of Pepsi. It helps to have a plan for the day.

My daughter (18) asked me why all this Pepsi, and I told her that I have stopped drinking alcohol, and I needed a treat for the weekend. She asked me why I stopped drinking- if I had a problem with alcohol? (!) So you havenˋt noticed?, I asked her. No, she said! I am partly releived, and at the same time it tells me allot on how my habit was.
My wife understands now, but she needed allot of argumentation from my part. No one in my family applauds my sobriety project I feel.
Problem with that again, is that I keep my WD-symptoms to myself, when i actually need som direct support. Exhausting situation.

Anyway- nothing of this can tip me off the wagon now. I do not want to go through this **** again! (Remainder to self)

The observant reader might think this is a thread written to remind myself of how day 12 was, so that I will not have to do day 12 again- you are right!

Just needed to get it off my chest- it actually helped

Thank you for reading, you lovely bunch of people

sugarbear1

I suggest putting a pitcher of water in the fridge. Periodically walk to the fridge, pour your water and drink it. This kind of mimics the way we drank, so you aren't focused on that in the back of your brain. Keep writing on here when you feel weird or something, like you noticed, it really helps!

Wastinglife

I can certainly emphasize with you my friend. When you give up the booze, your body and brain need some time to adjust. Everyone is different, but it will take a couple weeks at least for you start feeling like your normal self. This advice is not from a doctor. My own experience only. The sugar cravings are normal. If you start to have withdrawal symptoms like heavy sweating, shaky hands. Go to the nearest ER. They will help you out. May need some medication for the withdrawal symptoms.

skybert

I just poured me a wine glass of apple juice and soda, and drink it like it is wine. Small sips. To me it does the trick👍

skybert

I don´t think I need meds for the WD. I am relatively used to weird sensations and physical oddities. Usually it will pass without any other actions than distractions. Thank you for kind advice Wastinglife

fishkiller

My wife was kind of in disbelief I felt I needed to quit. She said I wasn't "that" bad.

They do not understand and that is perfectly ok.
Glad you got it off your chest.

You did the 100% right thing by coming here and posting.

We are doing this for ourselves not them. They will no doubt reap the benefits but we must keep focused on how we feel about our sobriety not how others feel

jr67

So, sky, does that make today Day 13? Congratulations on your lucky 13 today, and on keeping aware of your main goal here, sobriety. Yeah, it's probably a good sign, in the scheme of things, that your daughter did not seem to realize you have a drinking problem, but what really counts, of course, is what you think and know.

I'm 52 days into this sobriety thing, and loving it, but in my real life no one thought I had a drinking problem (well, maybe my doctor suggested cutting back might help lower my blood pressure, and maybe an ex who has been in twelve-step programs for 20-plus years or so now has said something once or twice), but mainly, I am (was) a high-functioning substance abuser. It was me, myself, and I who thought it was time to take a Dry January, and now February, and most recently a "century" pledge (century = 100 dry days).

So congrats again, and stick with it.

(P.S. Have you considered Diet Pepsi, or perhaps flavored fizzy water as a step-down alternative to booze? No matter what, you are right: You need to hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. I am still aware of the need for extra hydrating after 52 days.)

skybert

Fishkiller: You are so right. This is our own choice. A very appealing fact actually. We are not beyond the stage of beeing able to do that choice by ourselves, like many are.
I have to come to terms with that this is my own project. I know I get the support I need by you guys! Thank god you are here

skybert

Here in Norway, I still have one and a half day untill I can shout 14 days

52 days here I come....in a few days I was sober for 18 months, before the last relapse. That is a huge motivation for me. I urge for that clean feeling. The energy, clear head, physical capasity and abowe all, the feeling of victory!

I bought Pepsi Max- no sugar, but the big bag of chips on the other hand...
In my situation, i need to address one challenge at the time. No matter what, I consume less calories without the booze, so the account is on the positive side still

HeadEast

Withdrawing is hard, but when you add the rapid cycling bipolar stuff into it, it becomes even harder. (I know). You have made it to day 12 and that's quite an accomplishment. Congratulations. The pizza sounds really good. Keep going and I wish you all the luck in the world!

DriGuy

I think these reactions from others are common to most of us here. Reactions vary from "Huh?" to strong support. The "Huh?" group is a bit strange, but then we worked hard on keeping our problem hidden for years. People knew we drank a lot, but few knew the full extent, and almost no one had a clue as to how much we suffered. This is where AA meetings helped me. To be with a group, regardless of any philosophical differences about what we needed to do, was the only support I got that was 100% behind my recovery.

Six months after I got sober, I told my ex who I had been married to for 19 years that I had quit. What felt like to me as almost a miracle was met with, "You did? Huh; cool." At best as I could detect in her tone was on the order of, "Why did you do that?" Granted she was not there for the worst of my drinking and that awful spiral at the end.

Wastinglife

Go to the nearest KFC store. Buy a bucket of fried chicken. The sodium will help your liver! Kidneys need sodium too. You may have diarrhea after though! Haha

fini

i'm glad that works for you...it wouldn't have, for me. i ended up giving all my wine glasses away, as the association was a bit much for me, in new sobriety.

Derringer

You might wanna re-think the high anxiety and Pepsi thing.

Caffeine is not going to help.

skybert

Thank you all for your support and helping me to put things in perspective.

Derringer: The anxciety has been with me since I was 16. The caffeine might make me restless, but has never trigged anxciety for me.

Newsflash:

My wife, who is a nurse specialized on infectous deseases, found out that I actually has got the flu. I laughted out loud when she told me. Lession learned.
WD or not- it might actually be not
I´ll make the pizza, and then straight to bed.

Dee74

congrats on day 12/13

D

skybert

Just reporting in:

Had 9 good hours of sleep last night. Feels like a hot shower after weeks in the wilderness!
Only plan for today is a walk with my dog, get the fever down for a while, and snug in with herbal tea and Netflix.
I am stunned by how I love beeing sober- or greatful....i don´t know. It just feels so right!
Sober greetings to you all, and make the best of your day/evening

fishkiller

yep, sober sleep is MUCH better.
I used to think I needed a drink to sleep. Now I realize the drink was killing my sleep. Yes I would fall asleep quickly but I would be restless all night and wake up constantly.
Now I fall asleep and pretty much hit a deep sleep and stay there at least a few hours and feel much better the next day.

skybert

Sorry fishkiller. I thought my thread had died out, and haven´t checked it for days.
Good sober sleep is highly underrated. The thing we really need in the recovery process, is good sleep. And when we need it the most, insomnia hits.
My theory is that the recovery process goes into a sort of fast lane from the point the sleeping pattern and quality gets more «normal».
I have Atarax (prescribed) to back me up, but haven´t needed it the last few nights.
16 days sober now, the flu is not bothering me mutch any more, the sun is shining, and life is fab at the moment!
Thank you for reading

fishkiller

Hey man no need to be sorry.
Sometimes I forget I replied to a post. Lol

Congrats on 16 days!

My sleep has been a little off lately but I think I am just letting my mind get overwhelmed with some things in my life. Nothing bad just a lot going on and I am not shutting it down like I should be.

I will say when I do sleep it is 1000000 times better sleep than drunk sleep.

As long as you post this thread wont die.