woowinnielrrm

Hey all. I've reached 525 days sober and out of the clear blue for 2 weeks I want to drink. Im not stressed out about anything so I have no idea where this is coming from. I refuse to give in but Im getting annoyed with the cravings and drinking dreams. Any thoughts?

Grateful0603

Stay strong.... just think how far you have come and what it wold feel like to go back. Do you do aa ? Maybe hit a few meetings, all some sober buddies, read the big book and keep posting here. You will find lots of support....

Dee74

hi woowinnielrrm

525 days is awesome - don't mess that up!

I think nearly everyone gets to a point where they forget how bad it was, or they think because they haven't had a drink for so long they might be ok to do that now,

Abstinence is not control. They are not the same thing.

I'm afraid this is a life long condition.

but...you know all this, or you wouldn't have posted for help ...just sometimes it helps seeing it in black and white.

No matter how long it is, the first drink back will always be the one to start the madness again - perhaps not right away but inevitably.



Re reading your day zero thread again would be a great start,
Are you still involved in AA?

D

least

I hope you stay strong and sober. Remember, thoughts don't have to become actions. Come here and read/post as much as you like. A safe place to come for a big hug.

Mags1

woowinnielrrm, you’ve come so far. You’re gonna get some bumps in the road now and again, strengthening your sober muscles, so as to step over these bumps will help you for anything unexpected.

Ghostlight1

Congratulations on 525 days, that is awesome.
When I got those thoughts, I never thought, 'Gee I sure am glad I drank last night'
Not once during my almost eleven years sober have I given in to those thoughts.
Early on, I romanticized a drink. Then I thought of the next day. All that sober time thrown away as if it didn't matter. And it didn't. I was once again an active alcoholic starting over from day one.
And I had a lot of day ones.
All the anxiety, regret and remorse came on me. How could I do it again?

There's a difference between wanting a drink needing one.
Seems to me, you don't need a drink and you want one. Nothing wrong with that, but that kind of thinking, and I know how deeply rooted it is in an alcoholic's mind, rears it's ugly head is forgetting the misery of the first drink.
And, if you're anything like me, there was never just one drink.

Think ahead. Do you really want to throw away all your sober time? I bet not.
Thoughts are just that. We certainly don't have to act on them.
You've gotten some great advice.
Hang in there. If we acted on every thought we had it wouldn't necessarily be in our best interest. Self control can be tough. But do what's in your best interest.
You won't regret not having a drink. What about if you caved and listened to that thought. Save yourself some misery and look at it as a test. That's all it is.
A test you can pass.

Delilah1

Congrats on 525 days! What have you been doing in recovery to support you so far? Can you think of something you might be able to add in to support you with the feelings about drinking?

woowinnielrrm

hey Dee! I am not going to drink I was just wondering if Im having thoughts because it might be PAWS? Believe me I've worked too hard on my sobriety!

CRRHCC

You are doing great because you value sobriety over inebriation. We are all driven to seek happiness (reward). All human behavior is driven by the pursuit of happiness (reward) and that, when you choose to do something, you do so because you see it as your best available option.

Cravings are just temporary, "Ruminating Reasons," to drink.

Ask your self, what emotion do I "feel," right before I have that urge and decide to take that drink, do a drug or engage in any compulsive behavior? I'm not asking what you are thinking, I'm asking what are you feeling? All addictions, all compulsive behaviors, always serve an emotional purpose! What is that purpose? That purpose (behavior) is almost always a method of regaining control over feeling frustrated, helpless, feeling trapped, powerless or out of control regarding some specific circumstance. Empower yourself and regain control with a healthy high value behavior that is important to you.

Dee74

Good to hear you're secure

Could be PAWs I guess - doesn't really fit with my experience but I'm no doctor.

Often there's just a dropping off with how much we do for our recovery.

I don't doubt you've worked hard but are you still working hard or have you maybe levelled off a little?

D

AnvilheadII

525 days of continuous sobriety is awesome.
526 days is even better!
according to my calculator, 525 days is 1.43 years or about 17.5 months. while this is truly a gift, it is not surprising that the beast in the bushes is still there. a very wise person in another post said that Addiction is very Patient. the beast never sleeps.
so experiencing a flare up of craving or thoughts is not at all unusual OR a sign that you are doing anything wrong. you are just on the road of recovery and sometimes it's a bit bumpy.
double down on sober actions. let this be a good thing, a touchstone, a strong reminder of where you came from and where you are headed.

woowinnielrrm

Thank you that's exactly my feelings. Good news is I feel much better today. I just keep digging my heels in and understand cravings are temporary.

AnvilheadII

and understand cravings are temporary.

indeed! they may SEEM endless at the time, but the average craving event is about 20 minutes or less. kinda like a middle of the night charley horse!

remember, part of early recovery is learning how to deal with things sober. your first summer. your first holiday. your first birthday. your first raise. or maybe your first car wreck. or bad news about a relative. whatever it is, it will be your first opportunity to navigate your way through sober. doesn't have to be pretty - there are no style points for recovery!

zoobadger

I'm 18 months sober. Anytime something happens that's better (or only possible) because of sobriety I try to savor it and deliberately remember it.

When I have moments like you're describing I think of those things and it reminds me why sobriety is so much better. Not just because I'm avoiding misery, but also because I can enjoy things that were impossible before.

D122y

I'm over 4 years without intentionally drinking to get drunk and I still crave all the time.

Not sure when it is going to happen, but I know some things to pull out of it.

There is a link here, but basically i am a drug addict for life. My current doc are exercise, coffee, seeing shows, eating etc etc.

I am a non drinker. I am no longer physically addicted, but mentally I am a drug addict for life.

Thanks.

5329guy

I love this!