"Pour it out"
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 705
"Pour it out"
I apologize if this thread is not appropriate and close it, if this is the case.
This is, however, something I have wondered throughout the years on these threads.
When we see a member struggling, still drinking, still deep into that week long binge, one of the things you will see, as forms of advice, more often than not, is to dump it or pour it out.
That seems the obvious answer but what about people who are unaware of the dangers of withdrawal and going "cold turkey"? And, on top of that, scared to see a doctor?
I have, on more than a couple occasions, given money to homeless people knowing full well that money is going to buy more booze. But, I see them shaking and cold and is it really worth it for me to see that they suck it up and hopefully get through it?
Fortunately, the vast majority of advice is to see a doctor. But, unfortunately, i think the majority of people are woefully ignorant as to how scary and dangerous withdrawal really is. My eyes were really opened when I finally said to my husband, "i think I need to go to the hospital" back in January. I could not even sign my name with my finger.
Back to what I was saying earlier It is the same when I have given money to the homeless on the streets. I don't want them to die, seizing in a corner and cold because "I know where that money goes".
Anyone else feel this way?
This is, however, something I have wondered throughout the years on these threads.
When we see a member struggling, still drinking, still deep into that week long binge, one of the things you will see, as forms of advice, more often than not, is to dump it or pour it out.
That seems the obvious answer but what about people who are unaware of the dangers of withdrawal and going "cold turkey"? And, on top of that, scared to see a doctor?
I have, on more than a couple occasions, given money to homeless people knowing full well that money is going to buy more booze. But, I see them shaking and cold and is it really worth it for me to see that they suck it up and hopefully get through it?
Fortunately, the vast majority of advice is to see a doctor. But, unfortunately, i think the majority of people are woefully ignorant as to how scary and dangerous withdrawal really is. My eyes were really opened when I finally said to my husband, "i think I need to go to the hospital" back in January. I could not even sign my name with my finger.
Back to what I was saying earlier It is the same when I have given money to the homeless on the streets. I don't want them to die, seizing in a corner and cold because "I know where that money goes".
Anyone else feel this way?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 850
This is such a hard conversation and topic. I think typically we tell people to pour it out and then go to the doctor, but not everyone has that luxury.
I know what you mean though. The bus I take home from work picks up at a park in downtown where all the old alcoholics congregate. The drink all day type. Honestly? I think the onus falls on the lack of resources and support for addicts.
I dunno. I just wanted to let you know I think about this too.
I know what you mean though. The bus I take home from work picks up at a park in downtown where all the old alcoholics congregate. The drink all day type. Honestly? I think the onus falls on the lack of resources and support for addicts.
I dunno. I just wanted to let you know I think about this too.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Oh, I'm the same way. I give money to the homeless. I actually get cash back at the grocery store to give to them. After I give it to them, I figure it's none of my business what they spend it on. And if booze takes them away from their pitiable life situation for a few hours, so be it.
I will not, however, give money to crack addicts. And I'm street smart enough to know the difference.
I've actually written about this here before.
So, yes, I do give money to probable alcoholics. Mainly because I know somewhat what they're going through. And there but for the grace of God...
I will not, however, give money to crack addicts. And I'm street smart enough to know the difference.
I've actually written about this here before.
So, yes, I do give money to probable alcoholics. Mainly because I know somewhat what they're going through. And there but for the grace of God...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Um I guess I just try to be responsible for my posts and that they line up with what has been my experience.
If someone has just purchased booze or has just started a relapse, I think pour it out is the logical solution, and probably safe medically. So if that's what is in someone's heart to post, well who am I to question? I never say that because, well, I know I wouldn't. So to me its not logical. I mean, can't argue, makes good sense, no? But when did my addiction care about good sense. Sometimes folks say they do indeed pour out the booze...so, maybe it works.
If someone is deep in I never would advise that. But that's just me. I always tell folks to get help, ER, call the dr, anything but just leave them with the idea that cold turkey is a good option. But again, that's just me. And nothing here is actually medical advice.
I give money to homeless people too. I don't judge and assess them. I don't care if they are addicts, mentally ill, lying, or what drug they may or may not use. What's the point in that? And who am I to judge? Where does it stop? Maybe they are a rapist or a murderer. Or maybe they are just really down in their luck. Maybe they are working with an organized group and are simply swindling...which is a thing for sure. Sooooo I dunno. Clearly I do it because it eases my conscience for being so damn lucky in life.....if I'm honest. So kill two birds with one stone.
If someone has just purchased booze or has just started a relapse, I think pour it out is the logical solution, and probably safe medically. So if that's what is in someone's heart to post, well who am I to question? I never say that because, well, I know I wouldn't. So to me its not logical. I mean, can't argue, makes good sense, no? But when did my addiction care about good sense. Sometimes folks say they do indeed pour out the booze...so, maybe it works.
If someone is deep in I never would advise that. But that's just me. I always tell folks to get help, ER, call the dr, anything but just leave them with the idea that cold turkey is a good option. But again, that's just me. And nothing here is actually medical advice.
I give money to homeless people too. I don't judge and assess them. I don't care if they are addicts, mentally ill, lying, or what drug they may or may not use. What's the point in that? And who am I to judge? Where does it stop? Maybe they are a rapist or a murderer. Or maybe they are just really down in their luck. Maybe they are working with an organized group and are simply swindling...which is a thing for sure. Sooooo I dunno. Clearly I do it because it eases my conscience for being so damn lucky in life.....if I'm honest. So kill two birds with one stone.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Context is everything. Its a thread by thread thing, member by member.
You can't make general rules.
If someones posting help I just bought a bottle - I think pour it out is appropriate advice.
If it's a longer bender, I'll usually suggest they see their doctor if they're worried about withdrawal.
Remember that no one is bound to do what we want them to, for better or worse.
Considering we're not meant to give medical advice I'm satisfied we give good advice most of the time
D
You can't make general rules.
If someones posting help I just bought a bottle - I think pour it out is appropriate advice.
If it's a longer bender, I'll usually suggest they see their doctor if they're worried about withdrawal.
Remember that no one is bound to do what we want them to, for better or worse.
Considering we're not meant to give medical advice I'm satisfied we give good advice most of the time
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: here, now.
Posts: 1,236
I feel this way sometimes about advising people to go to a dr, but I still advise it. The reason I feel uncomfortable is because I know from working around the medical field in the US how difficult and sometimes impossible that is for people who have no money or insurance. (And if they have no money they definitely haven’t paid their insurance bill). No job? No insurance. I once helped a guy who had gotten in a terrible bicycle accident. He ended up having his pelvis wired back together as it was broken in seven places on both sides of his body. I tried to call the ambulance and he screamed no!!!! I can’t afford it!!! He ended up getting a ride from a guy with a truck, screaming in pain the whole way. His insurance didn’t cover ambulance and it would have cost him his entire average lower end paycheck for four months.
I once spent all the money I had on a dr visit and the meds I was prescribed when I was very ill with a potentially fatal and treatable illness. I was misdiagnosed tho and the meds didn’t work. Fortunately there was a free hospital 100 miles away, which required borrowing bus fare to take four buses there. By the time I got there I had a temp of 104 and I was hallucinating. But I had to spend that day taking the bus 100 miles because it was the closest place I could go to. The line went out the door. Most states don’t have free hospitals. I don’t even know if this one is still free. This was when I was in between jobs, a long time ago.
So when I advise people to see a dr, people who are desperate, I always clench my teeth because if they are in the US I figure they may be unable to do that. We can say that nothing should come between them and getting help, but the reality is that they aren’t probably able to think about it that way. And when they get the very basic CYA treatment they will get in a US hospital with no insurance, they get released on the street at whatever hour they were technically stabilized, as I was that time long ago, and the last person they talked to was the person giving them their bill. How stressful is that? How helpful? You spent 24 hours in a hospital, you have a script for medicine you can’t pay for, and a bill that totals more than a year’s salary if you’re working, and if you don’t pay it in 30 days we will send it to collections. If you get sent to collections it will show up on your file in a future background check if you try to get another job.
I wouldn’t go to a dr either.
I once spent all the money I had on a dr visit and the meds I was prescribed when I was very ill with a potentially fatal and treatable illness. I was misdiagnosed tho and the meds didn’t work. Fortunately there was a free hospital 100 miles away, which required borrowing bus fare to take four buses there. By the time I got there I had a temp of 104 and I was hallucinating. But I had to spend that day taking the bus 100 miles because it was the closest place I could go to. The line went out the door. Most states don’t have free hospitals. I don’t even know if this one is still free. This was when I was in between jobs, a long time ago.
So when I advise people to see a dr, people who are desperate, I always clench my teeth because if they are in the US I figure they may be unable to do that. We can say that nothing should come between them and getting help, but the reality is that they aren’t probably able to think about it that way. And when they get the very basic CYA treatment they will get in a US hospital with no insurance, they get released on the street at whatever hour they were technically stabilized, as I was that time long ago, and the last person they talked to was the person giving them their bill. How stressful is that? How helpful? You spent 24 hours in a hospital, you have a script for medicine you can’t pay for, and a bill that totals more than a year’s salary if you’re working, and if you don’t pay it in 30 days we will send it to collections. If you get sent to collections it will show up on your file in a future background check if you try to get another job.
I wouldn’t go to a dr either.
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