Call the student loan company, if it’s federal loans you are eligible for income contingent repayment. They can only take 10% of your disposable income. I owe a lot, more than I’d bring home in two years, I too do not care for my field, but I’ll work it and build on my skills to go into another area in my degree field. All the little things in life, the hassles and burdens will only get better bit by bit when I got sober. Be grateful for what you do have, somebody in this world would give anything to trade places with you. I agree with others about seeking some help for how you are feeling. Getting sober, it will all work out one baby step, phone call, appointment, interview, at a time.