noaddedsugar

This sober life is easier than I thought it would be. I thought after my sober challenge passed in January I'd find February sooo difficult but it's been okay. That's not to say I haven't been tempted, but when I say tempted I mean a fleeting thought of 'a glass of wine would be nice' and then it passes rather than intense cravings.

My partners drank wine and gin around me on 2 occasions and it hasn't bothered me and there's alcohol in the house I have no desire to touch.

Had a catchup with a close friend the other day and as soon as she sat down she said "I need a glass of wine" and I told her I wasn't drinking but she should go for it! She decided against it and was like oh no it's okay I probably shouldn't. Is it weird that I felt like I was stopping her from enjoying herself? Like I didn't want her to feel awkward drinking if I wasn't. Messed up that I felt guilty ha!

OH is out for drinks with her friends tomorrow and I'm meeting them after I finish work for a little bit. They'll be well into their drinking day by the time I get there and I feel like it could be a challenge. I've never really socialised with them completely sober so it will be a first too and I'm not sure if I'll be tempted or not. Should I avoid the situation completely and just say I'm beat and go straight home after work or should I face up to the situation because I'm going to have to do it sometime?

Those of you who drank to deal with your social anxiety how did you deal with socialising in your early sobriety?

Strangely since I've stopped drinking my anxiety seems to have disappeared so I might be fine. Sober life is so very new to me though. I've probably drank in most social situations since I was 18.. that's 10 years!

Dee74

I've always been socially anxious. If I'm honest my drinking started as a way to combat that.

I always wanted to find the inner raconteur sweet spot between painfully shy sober and almost passed out obnoxious drunk...never found it.

There was no middle ground for me.

I'm still not a great social person - I prefer small gatherings over big ones and people I know over strangers...

Rather than trying to change that I accept it now. It's a part of who I am...and in accepting that some of the anxiety has gone from those situations .

I am still painfully shy but I can make a decent effort of talking to people now and even tho it's still not really enjoyable for me it's not an ordeal either.

D

NerfThis

I've suffered social anxiety for many many years and did find that drinking a couple before meeting people on a night out would drastically ease the anxiety. The problem was that any extreme binge drinking I did just made the anxiety a million times worse the next day and would draw it out for days.

I've discovered now with some sober time that the fear I have prior to a social event is MUCH better than drinking to immediately combat it, then suffering with the aftermath of crippling anxiety, self loathing, guilt and fears for my health.

SoberCAH

I'll bet your friend had a great visit with you without a glass of wine.

She's probably happy that you weren't drinking.

Like Dee and Nerf, I suspect that I probably started drinking to alleviate my social anxiety and my lack of a sense of belonging.

You have the opportunity to get sober at a young age, a few years younger that I got sober.

I hope that you seize the opportunity.

You don't need to waste any more years out there in the drinking world.

The sober life is the way to go.

noaddedsugar

That is me.. I guess I am always going to be an introverted person. It's just in my nature. I suffered from crippling social anxiety for so long that I didn't think I'd ever be able to work a job. Alcohol has always been my crutch for everything so it's learning how to cope without that.

We did have a lovely catchup SoberCAH.. nice meal and conversation was all that was needed. I am going to seize the opportunity and I'm not wasting any more time, money and energy on being intoxicated.

I didn't go out tonight but there's always next time. I've quite enjoyed a night in to myself. Few drunken texts from the mrs.. nothing bad or anything. Sounds mean but I'm quite looking forward to being the smug one when she wakes up with a rotten hangover. I know that's awful haha

I have been drinking tonic water with lemon out of my gin glass and it's sort of fooling me into thinking I am having an alcoholic beverage. It's comforting almost. I watched a video earlier of a celebrity I look up to talk about how she's quit drinking for health reasons with glowy skin etc. The more days that go by the stronger my resolve is getting. When I look back at the state I'd got myself into it already feels like a different life.