Tetrax

Okay so basically I just did 16 full days dry (3rd ever longest streak) but I couldn't deal with the insomnia, the sleep deprivation. There were no good mornings of 'Yay I'm not hungover!' I just felt hungover the whole time even though I hadn't drunk, and I couldn't do it anymore, so I drank yesterday, and it was okay. Then I drank again today, to 'put myself to sleep.' And it didn't exactly work. I have work in eight hours. I'm wide awake. I've put the booze down, but sleep ain't happening anytime soon.

I don't know. I came off a two-year spell of Prozac on Dec. 19th so maybe I'm still withdrawing from that and that's why I couldn't sleep? I've basically been treating myself as my own human guinea pig lately (if that makes sense?), giving drugs here (caffeine in the daytime and nicotine, well, all of the time), taking away drugs there (Prozac and booze). I just couldn't believe I'd got to Day 17 dry and only had about three nights sleep the whole time. So disheartened.

Obviously I know recovery is so much more than not drinking but with AA I just can't deal with Step 2 onwards (I am just so atheist by now I can't even deal with simple PHRASES like 'power[s] greater than ourselves'). And with SMART and their pros and cons and whatever, obviously this thing isn't as logical as that! And with Rational Recovery and Allen Carr and This Simple Mind sure I get it! It's idiotic drinking! But again this thing isn't as logical as that!

Sorry for ranting, and letting folks down. I just feel beat. And I wish I could sleep.

P.S. I live with three other people but we all avoid each other. I basically live alone, and only talk to people at work (when I make it in).

Healthyandsober

don't give up drinking won't solve anything. read my post alcohol will kill you

FeelingGreat

Hi Tetrax, you seem to have got to the point where you can cope with the idea of stopping, but not some of the follow up symptoms. I was lucky that nothing changed much in that area for me.

As a fellow atheist I understand about AA. Are you able to take it for the sake of getting support from other As? Many atheists take what they need and leave the rest.

My suggestion is to enlist the help of your doctor. Be brutally honest with him/her about how much you drank, and what happened when you gave up. My sister who is a GP says they usually have a good idea what people drink and find it so refreshing when the patient is honest with them. I makes a world of difference to have your doctor's support. They may also be able to tide you over with sleeping pills. If you need to, take them. The important thing here is not to drink.

Hang around, there are plenty of people who know just what you're talking about.

Tetrax

Thanks for this, you got me right. I am totally up for quitting forever (doesn't scare me anymore), if only I could deal with the immediate fallout. I guess I'm just scared of chronic insomnia, which of course could just be an excuse my AV has given me to keep drinking, even though it clearly doesn't work! THANKS A BUNCH AV!

listae

I'm basically like you. I have gone 2-3 weeks max maybe a month at some point without drinking over the last 15 years. I've been in denial for so long. I kept drinking a few glasses of wine everyday and, of course, the amount always increases because you need more and more to feel that "good" feeling. I isolated too and started to feel like I was always going to be alone. I was always alone. I drank mostly by myself because then I could drink without shame. I could have as much as I wanted.

Then, because I couldn't finish a major project, I lost my job. I have symptoms of depression too. But all I know is the misery of going back and drinking alone is worse. I only have 12 days. I've been a revolving door at AA too and have had trouble with the higher power thing. But all I know is that I need to cling to something other than alcohol. Alcohol has ruined my career and health.

You can do it. Don't let this slip go deeper. It is harder to get out. Get help.

Ghostlight1

Hello friend. You're not alone. I've been sober ten years and I'll be awake until 3 or 4 am tonight. I'm an insomniac. I never have gotten much sleep. Once a week I'll sleep well, but that's about it.
I've gotten used to it. I've adjusted my circadian rhythm. I don't function on a normal level. I know that and have accepted it. I sleep when I can and find plenty to do when I'm awake, which is, obviously, most of the time.
How was your sleep before alcohol became a problem?
Alcohol didn't make me sleep. Pass out maybe, but I stayed up all night drinking. It's just the way I'm wired.


I agree with seeing a doctor if you're really concerned. Maybe it will help.
Wish I could offer more in the way of advice, but wanted to let you know you're not alone.
I'll sleep when I sleep. I've gotten used to it.

least

When I got sober, it took me longer than 16 days for my sleep to settle down. You're not giving yourself enough sober time to see the benefits. It takes several months to truly realize how much better you feel. Give it another go, and stay sober, no matter what.

Tetrax

Thanks guys for your responses. And just a futher follow-up FeelingGreat, you're right again (with the above quote) and I should try another time but in the past my GP has been dismissive, thinking I can moderate if I try hard enough... Also (I'm in the UK) they're reluctant to give out sleeping pills - which I understand - but that leaves few options otherwise. As much as I love our free health service, it is behind many other countries when it comes to such issues as addiction and mental health.

Dee74

Hi Tetrax

I think insomnia is pretty common - I would go from no sleep to fairly regular sleep in about 10 days.

If thats not happening for you I think you'd be way off seeing a Dr than reaching for the bottle - it stands to reason the more dependent we get on the stuff the more withdrawal problems we're likely to have.

There are some pretty good common sense ideas here too"

http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/insomnia/...omniatips.aspx
http://www.better-sleep-better-life....mnia-tips.html

If your doctor is dismissive, and worse than that, S/he thinks moderation is possible if we try, you need another doctor.

Just wondering whose idea was it to come off the Prozac?

D

Tetrax

*This Naked Mind was the book I meant to quote in my OP. God I'm tired!

And Dee it was mine, 'cause I felt I was long past the therapeutic effects and maybe it was that that was keeping me up. I've been okay with coming off it generally but now I'm more confused than ever as to what the real cause of this insomnia is. In past abstinence periods I've been mostly ok with sleep but then my drinking had never been 7 days a week till fairly recently.

Dee74

Yeah I had an inkling...I really gotta recommend coming off stuff like that with a Dr - thats one area where based on my experience tapering is generally a good idea, especially if it's been a while that you were on them.

You've made the break now so...

I don't know if thats been a factor or not, but I hope things get better fro,m here on in T

D

Guener

Since there are multiple things going on with you, Tetrax, it's hard to untangle why after a couple weeks you are getting no sleep, but it happened to me when I quit, too. I was not working at the time, so it was easier for me to deal with the lack of sleep at night, but that's not true for you. Getting your GP on board with a serious medical plan might be helpful, it's worth that additional visit.

If you are put back on Prozac or some alternative psychiatric drug(s), it is important that you take the medication exactly as prescribed, and that includes the right way on coming off of it, if that's what is right for you.

I was prescribed a non-addictive medication that helped me fall asleep, though not necessarily stay asleep through night, and I have a new sleep cycle that works for me now, but it took quite a while.

I understand your feelings about various programs' pros and cons, and I have pulled from more than one to build my plan that is working for me so far. But it was important for me to be face to face around recovering alcoholics frequently to gain perspectives and to have that support day to day. Today I'm still in the company of recovering alcoholics every day on SR, and I listen to what they do to get and to stay sober. What you will do that works for your plan is a good path to follow and to stick with, knowing that you will not be in agreement with everything you hear or read.

You can find your way, don't let things overwhelm you.

PhoenixJ

I agree with Dee, see a doc


support to you

MindfulMan

One shouldn't stop taking SSRI antidepressants suddenly, although because Prozac has such a long half life it's probably the easiest. In any event, there is a withdrawal syndrome. My issues with Prozac INCLUDED insomnia, I myself have not experienced insomnia especially badly after ceasing SSRIs of various sizes, shapes and colors.

Not sure how much you were drinking. I was very ill, and used a benzo taper to withdraw under medical care, and it still was really 4-6 weeks before my sleep became more 'normal.'

If you want to completely stop drinking it's not really your doctor's call that you should moderate. Self advocate, it's your life. From what I understand, in the UK they are less likely to help you medically in detox than here in the US. I'm a big fan of medically assisted detox. It's also not a great idea to stop more than one thing at a time like alcohol and, say, antidepressants. Also if your depression has any sort of seasonal component, in the Northern Hemisphere deep winter might not be the best time, especially suddenly.

You're 16 days in, these things take time. It will get better, and the worst is almost certainly behind you if you have been completely off both the Prozac and the alcohol.

Check in here please.

Also I'm a stone-cold agnostic but did use AA Step 1 and the community for the first 90 days or so before I entered a cognitive based outpatient rehab. I can't handle the whole higher power thing either, but some atheists find a way. To me other things were a better fit. YMMV.

MantaLady

Definitely see your Dr, there is a lot of very valid documented research about how doing withdrawal from Prozac cold turkey is dangerous. All the symptoms you described before you started taking them again are well documented symptoms of withdrawal from this drug. Insomnia is also a withdrawal symptom. The clinical guidelines in the U.K. are being revisited due to many people experiencing the exact same as you. Please see your dr and drinking is not a good idea while taking SSRI’s and isn’t going to help with the symptoms. x

noaddedsugar

I'm in the UK too and Doctors are so strict with what they prescribe so I can imagine many would be reluctant to give out sleeping tablets but it may be worth seeing your GP anyway.

I'm on day 13 and I struggled massively with sleeping at first and got to the point where I was contemplating having a drink to knock me out. It's so frustrating lying there tossing and turning. Lack of sleep can really send a person insane! However I remembered drinking might of helped me get to sleep but it got to the point where I would be waking up multiple times though the night in a panic with night sweats and shakes. At least now if I don't sleep I'm not walking around with bloodshot eyes smelling like alcohol.

Don't know if you have a workout routine but I've found since I've started exercising daily (once I felt well enough) it's really helped. Tires me out and also gives my mind something to focus on.

August252015

I did a lot of "independent" decision making when I was drinking. It was never successful, very much including my (mis)use of anti-depressants and other mental health specific meds.

I have learned from our friends here in other countries that the dr situation is different than in the US in a lot of cases. If I could find another GP, and truly, a psych or addiction specialist, that would be the best thing I could do on top of no drinking. In the US (and it sounds, perhaps, even moreso in the UK based on what drs do or don't prescribe or suggest, whether it's out of practical/litigious related reasons or other), it's rare to find a GP who is also truly well-versed in addiction.

It is scary to leap to the side of sobriety- and having watched my sponsor wean off of (note the word wean) her 20 yrs on anti-depressants (under her doctors' care ) it is often a process that sometimes sucks - and doesn't "resolve" itself in a couple of weeks.

Nothing about getting sober resolves itself completely in a couple of weeks. Each of us have a different path of progress, but mine sure took longer to regulate in my new life.

Getting through my terror and not drinking and taking the right meds as prescribed was critical to the beginning of my recovery.

Wishing you the next right choices in getting sober.

Plure

In my layperson view, coming off an SSRI like Prozac and stopping drinking sounds like it might be too much all at once. Both can have challenging withdrawal issues on their own, let alone together.