wecoyote13

Have made it over 30 hours now so...Day 1 as they say...have not been here in a while...can talk about my recent story later but found a wife had 3 kids...2018 was the year that this all became unmanageable and the list of ways I'm letting everyone down and embarrassing myself has gotten out of hand. The lengths I was going to to be drunk were extraordinary. At least 10 drinks per day, lots of vodka, and creeping into the morning hours. and daytime lately.

I took the hard step of confessing to my wife. Was shocked that she did not really know. Talked a few times. Made a plan.

Just kind of stayed up the whole night last night. dealt with insomnia, scary brain activity, eventual sleep and again scary dreams...racing heart, and sweating.

I think with my wife's help I can make long term progress. She has not held this against me one bit and is really impressed with my attitude. I'm sure we will need some outside counseling to stay on track...but a Day 1 in the books is a great start.

Thanks!

-Bill

least

Make this your last day one.

Ghostlight1

Welcome back, glad you made it.
Congratulations on day one. I'm glad your wife is supporting you.
You can do this. Do whatever it takes.
And yes, make this your last day one.

Anna

Good for you for getting through Day 1. I'm glad you have your wife's support, and I do hope that keep reading and posting here.

Dee74

Welcome back Bill

D

wecoyote13

Made it to Day 3 and I almost feel guilty as this has not been as bad as past Detox periods. Slept well 2nd night, poorly last night...but...some sleep! Been getting up early for really light workouts as my BP is still up I can tell. I could write a book as you all know all of my thoughts are trained on this experience. The bad...I grapple with "permanency"...as you've said "may it by my last day 1"...I read one great post from someone on "I don't want one glass of wine, I want ALL the wine"..and that is what I have to keep walking myself through...when summer comes and i want that one beer on the deck...have to remember by this year I was pumping two shots before opening a very strong belgian beer for my time on the deck in the sun, then another shot before dinner...and so on into the night. To everyone around me...it looked like a two beer night...but it was a 12 drink night. The good...I've been spending so much more positive time with my kids...its so effortless to be a good father when sober. My wife pleaded with me to come to bed at 9:30 last night and hold her...she fell right to sleep feeling loved...but didn't let me totally off the hook saying "its nice to not smell alcohol on you"...whew...lots of days ahead...may they be good and sober. Thanks all!
(for the record I am not sure I love the new feel of the forums...is it just me? what happened to the "thank you" button on the posts? )

wecoyote13

I have hit a wall today...feels like every cell in my body woke up to the fact that the "punch bowl" is gone...exhausted....hoping a good night of sleep will help.

RikerNY

Bill - Good Job! Each day you'll feel a bit better. Sounds like you are doing well and have awesome support from wife. Enjoy those kid. If you are enjoying them, just think how much they are enjoying you sober. Day 16 here... taking it day by day.

wecoyote13

Congrats on 16 days!

Fearlessat50

Congrats on day 1. One day and one breath at a time!

Soberwolf