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Old 12-01-2018, 07:19 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Jjl,

It only got worse when I was drinking. It only got better when I quit.

I will crave for life. I can put a fancy paragraph around it with all sorts of references...bottom line...addict for life.

When I crave...I think BpSSS. My mantra.

Thanks.
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When I crave I think of the next day after effects:

high blood pressure, sleep issues, strength loss, immune system compromise (sick).

BpSSS. My mantra.

Studied "alcohol kindling" and "alcohol PAWS."

Last intoxication: 8 May 15.
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Old 12-01-2018, 07:55 AM   #22 (permalink)
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I did it by making a decision to not drink anymore. I lurked here while drinking and multiple years later still lurk here To keep in touch several times a week. I just knew it was time for me to quit. It did take minute to minute mindfulness of why I wanted to ready for a drink. I remember Driving to the bottle shop and asking myself " why are you doing this?" and pulling over sorting it out and turning around to go back home. Then I would just delay the drink over and over again until bed time. The reward of a sober sleep and waking up feeling well rested was worth it. Meditation and reading a lot of Buddhist philosophy really helped me. SR helped a lot. There may be a sort of mystic thing going on as you read and identify with like minded folks here. That's what I think. Good luck. I know you read this all the time here but... it does get a lot easier with every day you put the alcohol behind you.
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Old 12-02-2018, 08:59 PM   #23 (permalink)
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It's been a little over nine months since I quit. I was having some health problems and decided to quit for three weeks to see if that helped. Over the course of those three weeks, I realized that moderation was impossible for me and I needed to quit for good. I've lost fifteen pounds and the chronic gastrointestinal problems that I have had for ten years resolved in weeks. I still think about drinking and have moments when I really want a glass of red wine but after nine months of thinking of myself as a problem drinker, I finally realized I am an alcoholic. When you read all of the posts here, you see the range of alcoholics. Some who hit rock bottom, some drank all day everyday, some weekend warriors and some who describe themselves as high functioning. The one thing we all seem to have in common is one is never enough. When I was drinking, I was never focused on the drink at hand but the one that was coming.
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Old 12-04-2018, 11:12 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizaD View Post
When I was drinking, I was never focused on the drink at hand but the one that was coming.
I echo your statements here and this bookmarks a great reminder. For me, the first 2 weeks did not prove that difficult once getting over the initial withdrawal. The fresh wounds had not been healed per say and I was fairly adamant I would not drink.

However as I stated before if I don't somehow remind myself of these wounds that alcohol inflicted I start to think about the good times, forgetting the wretched feelings and symptoms that alcohol brought on. These past few days have been tough. That said, I am thankful to be writing this today knowing those negative symptoms are gone/improved. Today the difficult part is the daily self reminder that alcohol is what brought those on and without it I am much better. I believe reading these posts and seeing others affected at various stages helps for that reminder.
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Old 12-05-2018, 06:04 AM   #25 (permalink)
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Alcohol couldn't/didn't inflict wounds as much as you willingly accepted the consequences of continuing to self intoxicate.

The internal calculation was decided on the experience of the effects of alcohol consumption and a willful disregard for the consequences.

The negative consequences hadn't proven a bar to future drinking, in the past, they may also not prove likewise in the future.

Disregarding all consequences of indulging the desire for alcohol , the negative consequences and the positive effects was the only way I was able to quit.

AVRT, great threads on these ideas here on SR in the Secular Recovery forum, showed me how to live comfortably with a latent desire for more alcohol while being fully committed to abstinence.

Rootin for ya
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