allishope73

Hello its day 3 when i changed my approach to recovery in order to.prevent relapse.... so as much as life is stressful
... still do not know how i survive with no husband.. no resources ...off sick in recovery... depressed anxious fatigued as it started from fatigue ... burn out alcohol was a medicine ... only made it worse ... Soo i went to the gym after felt still.low soo i went to recovery cafe first time ...and stayed till the end ...three hours ... met folks ..laughed ...attended a very good meeting and played bingo first time in life ....they had prises like toiletries ...or chocolates ...i never won but was so suprised a guy who won asked me to pick up a prize ... i was so suprised as badly wanted a set of candles ... i always had my house beautiful and smelly ... oils .... nicely decorated ... nearly a year i have no money to live so everything finished ... i still try to pick up flowers to keep standards ...to make what i can ...not to forget who i was who i am ...not to resent my husband and not to self medicate .... so came home with candles and was grateful to be in companion of like minded people ....i spoke during meeting ... i said whatever life brings i m.not going to self medicate with beer ... if i die i die respecting myself .... of course not planning to die yet ... but it was internal dialogue .... i m living 24 hours a day ... bring day 4 ... maybe one day i see the light in the tunnel ... now i know the gate to hell are closed and keep faith one day gate to heaven will open ... blessed night folks

Hopeful528

Congratulations on Day 3, the rewards are plentiful

Buckley3

On my day 3 I had no car, no money, severe bruises and cuts on my elbows and knees, no phone, stiffness in my chest and a bruise from my seatbelt (I'd hit a telephone pole at 45 mph 3 days prior.) I had to borrow the money to hire an attorney from a friend so I could delay my court date and not go to jail in 10 days. I had to make the decision to stop paying my mortgage so I could repay my friend. So I stopped paying my mortgage, knowing the clock was then ticking to sell my house or declare bankruptcy. I had to walk 2 hours to buy a phone on that day 3 so I could call that friend to borrow the money. That was the first action of rebuilding I took.

I was experiencing night sweats that made me feel like I could drown. Anxiety so bad I couldn't sleep for more than an hour. I didn't eat for 3 days and when I did all I could eat was half a ham sandwich.

I'm only 5 months sober but if you looked at me today you wouldn't believe what I just wrote. I hardly believe it.

You just keep picking up one foot and setting it in front of the other. Do 1 thing. Maybe 2. One piece at a time. Keep going. Be where you're supposed to be when you're supposed to be there. Keep going. One foot at a time.

I can't wait to read your posts in 3 months, 5 months...

-B

Dee74

Congrats on day 3 allishope - that's a great start
Welcome

D

allishope73

Thank you Buckley and Dee.... its my day 4 i kinda got into routine that i start from being mindful and planning one thing a day that involves recovery .... yes Buckley i will write in 3 ...5 months whatever happen honestly ...i hope life will be easier a little bit .... yes i read your expierience ... im glad you bounced back so fast well done ... o was lucky in my unlucky as never drove ... hubby drove me everywhere classic control and co dependence ... i regret i let it happen but also think in future i learn how to drive ... i am a bit determined Lady... not looking back ... thank you for your sharing its inspirational regarding outcome ... i posted my story in post day first ...blessed day oddat x

Buckley3

Hey so very sorry...didn't mean to make it about me. I guess reading your post brought back a lot of memories and I just wanted to try to inspire you to keep going. Just keep going it does get better.

allishope73

No no ...it was awesome to read
..i love such true posts ...real expierience as i share here my journey ... it inspired me a lot ... just English is my second language so sometime my posts can be tricky to get ... maybe .... soo day 4th going according to plan ... i met councellor had great session went to gym now food rest and womens group .... as i am in recovery and do not work for a while ehhh but its a must now stil pacing days as insomnia...... thinking also to explore SMARt recovery to integrate and learn all possible tools ... holistic approach as i m thinking when feel better in a year or two ... might be back to work in the field just with some greater expierience on practice not only theory and of course different client group ... regarding readiness... or library peace and calm ... but today is this one day 24 hours here and now ...
Lets see what life brings and keep sharing please

Midwest1981

great job on day 4!