Fail, try again, and fail again

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07-23-2018, 08:01 AM

# 21 (permalink)

slipnslide

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Join Date: Aug 2016

Posts: 96

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fearlessat50

You are expecting you can still have alcohol in moderation. And this is really tripping up your thinking, because in fact it does work for you for a little while. But then you are right back where you were.

This resonates with me so so much. Because it’s this right now. 80% of the time I drink I can and do control it. Maybe I’ll get a slight warm fuzzy feeling and then back off. But then there’s the time the drinking doesn’t stop. And your mention of comparing myself to those around me? Those around me don’t think I have a problem with my drinking. “So once in a while you go overboard... it’s ok. You were just letting loose”. They normalize it. And accept this behavior. Because they all do it too. But FOR ME it’s not acceptable.

02-04-2019, 07:25 PM

# 22 (permalink)

slipnslide

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Join Date: Aug 2016

Posts: 96

For anyone who cares, this post from July 23 was (so far) my last “day one” of no drinking. I’m on day 196 now. Not sure why, but this last blacknout drunk night was the one that stuck with me. That made me never want to feel like that again!