lessgravity

Unless drinking the poison is going to kill an intestinal infection you've somehow developed and a bottle of gin is the only cure, there is simply no reason whatsoever for anyone here to drink.

None for me. Not because I'm scared or elated, my father was an alcoholic or a saint, not because everyone I know drinks or because I have no friends, no because I have anxiety or feel overwhelmed with life or want to celebrate or am more successful than my wildest dreams or have self-esteem issues or started dating a heavy drinking supermodel or or or or.

All my "reasons" for drinking in the past were merely excuses to drink.

Just a minor, not all that well-thought-out rant. Seeing people struggle and the cycle circle and circle back and forth, looking back and seeing my old posts.

Hope we can get and stay sober.

Thank you always SR.

Finalround

Right on less. I have no excuses to drink. I just choose to. I need to choose NOT to.

Buckley3

Love it.

Reminds me of this from the Big Book:

"Selfishness - self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, "

Excuses. Poor me. I can't do this because of that. Or it's just too hard because of something. Poor me.

I am growing convinced that taking an attitude of not being defeated is essential. I'm also trying to get more comfortable saying things like "I'm just not going to do that now." Instead of feeling somehow obligated to make an excuse. Of course, I'm referring to little things in life wiht that - not drinking. But frankly, I think it applies nonetheless. Wasn't it Yoda who said "Drink, or don't drink, there is no try." :P

We have to own our crap. I hope I never lose sight of that...

Great post.

MantaLady

Absolutley! I have been prone to a self pity and making excuses. Got a lot of work to do to start believing in myself but no reason to have a drink.

My gran always used to say about alcoholics "poor me, poor me, pour me another drink"

entropy1964

I go through roughly 3 month cycles where I ponder a particular aspect of my abstinence. Maybe its acceptance...that's a big one...right there with surrender. Or coping and growing up. Or 'willingness' and what all that means in the context of AA.

Right now, I've really come to realize that my drinking/addiction have little or nothing to do with anything other than the drinking and addiction itself. I have for years made my abstinence/recovery contingent on so many things. Working out my issues, coping, mental health, the actions of others (did they leave me, did they die, did they lie, did they mistreat me), and the all important 'happiness' (which actually isn't that important). I made my abuse contingent on a lot of things too: I'm depressed, I'm lonely, I'm anxious, I was abused, my husband died, I was heart broken, I have cancer, he has cancer and on and on and on.

I don't have to be anything to quit drinking. I have to be willing to get help and do it. Quit. Whatever I'm dealing with in life will be there, drunk or sober. Its all just a massive excuse. Quitting depends on nothing but quitting. I made my mental health and life issues so enmeshed with my staying sober that I could never stay sober for longer than a couple of years. They are mutually exclusive.

I have no idea if that makes any sense. But for me it actually makes staying quit easier. My drinking is just that, addiction. Some of my issues are real (but lets face it, a lot of it was created by my addiction and certainly horribly exacerbated by it) but they are separate from my addiction. They are best dealt with after being sober for a time. And will only improve with long term abstinence.

Not everyone gets wasted to cope. But I'm pretty sure everyone has big problems in there lives....and frankly most of the world has it faaarrrr worse then I.

Nonsensical

But if I don't drink, I'm gonna feel like drinking.
Everyone knows that feeling like drinking means you must drink.
I mean, if you didn't, then...well...you might just keep feeling like drinking.

Buckley3

We all have. It's the nature of the beast. The underlying cause. I struggle with it daily. Sometimes I manage to beat it back. Sometimes I don't. But hey, at least my eyes are open now. Gotta be able to see it to do anything about it right?

@nonsensical - loved the post.