Sad and cravings....
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 110
Sad and cravings....
Last night I had some awful cravings :'( I just wanted an escape so bad from all the hurt and anger inside me. It led to half the night awake tossing and turning. Today inside me feels like a massive pain. I left my partner months after I gave up alcohol because he couldn't go a day without weed or alcohol. He wasn't particularly bothered with me at all in the end. He was controlling at times, could never be wrong and made everything my fault.
It still hurts massively. I feel like he's gotten away with everything because I could never say to him what he was doing wrong or he used it against me and made me feel so small. Now he is running about like nothing has happened. He is telling people we broke up because I didn't pull my weight about the house. Ha. Imagine. I feel such resentment towards him. I'm getting more angry. Even though I left him and my life is much better without him. There's still feelings there of course, because obviously he wasn't a monster all the time. I don't want another night like last night. Although I didn't drink and I'm glad, but I feel horribly low today :'( Please help.
It still hurts massively. I feel like he's gotten away with everything because I could never say to him what he was doing wrong or he used it against me and made me feel so small. Now he is running about like nothing has happened. He is telling people we broke up because I didn't pull my weight about the house. Ha. Imagine. I feel such resentment towards him. I'm getting more angry. Even though I left him and my life is much better without him. There's still feelings there of course, because obviously he wasn't a monster all the time. I don't want another night like last night. Although I didn't drink and I'm glad, but I feel horribly low today :'( Please help.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 780
Good on you not drinking! It’s amazing how manipulative people can drive us nuts and make us feel like we are losing it or in the wrong even when we aren’t! I’m sorry he’s taking up so much of your headspace (rent free, which he doesn’t deserve). Remember that your life IS better. Meditate or do something positive and don’t let thoughts of him keep intruding on your good life.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Next time someone starts to "update" you - tell them you are no longer interested in hearing anything about him.
People who feel a need to rub salt in your wounds really are not friends. I would limit contact with those people. Be firm with your boundaries.
People who feel a need to rub salt in your wounds really are not friends. I would limit contact with those people. Be firm with your boundaries.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
You should be proud of not drinking, the easy thing to do would have been to cave. Regarding your partner, as hard as it may be, try to keep the focus on yourself. Keeping tabs on him does nothing positive for you. You are moving onward and upward.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
Agree with Bim there, just say your not interested in hearing anything and leave it at that. When I split up with my ex I found those people updating me were updating him in the reverse so were reporting back to him how annoyed and upset I was about it all...and he won again knowing he could get to me even when we had split.
If you handle yourself with grace and he continues to slander you people will soon start to work out for themselves what an ar$e he is without you having to lower yourself to his standards.
If you handle yourself with grace and he continues to slander you people will soon start to work out for themselves what an ar$e he is without you having to lower yourself to his standards.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 1,246
Well done on getting through a bad night of it! When I feel very low the only thing that works is to exercise in the fresh air. Its usually the last thing I want to do but I am always glad when I force myself. Connecting with close friends also helps. Oh and posting on SR....lots of posting.
Support to you.
Support to you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 110
Thanks guys. Unfortunately I cannot avoid the person feeding back, as he has allowed me to stay with him until September. So it's something I have to suffer through. I've told him not to update me but then he gets drunk and tells me. Yesterday he was drunk and spilled beans. It's not an ideal situation living with someone who drinks, but it's temporary and better than being with my ex.
My ex has not been unkind that I'm aware of. But he is acting as if life is better without me, and that hurts. Although to be fair I am doing the same. I have such resentment. I want him to realise all the hurt and pain he has caused me. I know this is not the answer. I'm having a hard time letting go of the resentment.
Today I did go for a walk in nature and it has cheered me up a lot. But the anger is still in the background.
Your responses all mean a lot. Thank you
My ex has not been unkind that I'm aware of. But he is acting as if life is better without me, and that hurts. Although to be fair I am doing the same. I have such resentment. I want him to realise all the hurt and pain he has caused me. I know this is not the answer. I'm having a hard time letting go of the resentment.
Today I did go for a walk in nature and it has cheered me up a lot. But the anger is still in the background.
Your responses all mean a lot. Thank you
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 271
Craving what
Are you craving A severe hangover with terrible anxiety. Are you craving loss of money and respect. Are you craving having to call into work sick. Are you craving having to scrape yourself off the floor. If the answer to the above is no then do not drink.
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